Stilgherrian » 2007 » June

The Westpac Experience, Part 2

Stilgherrian — Sat, 30 Jun 2007 02:33:38 +0000

I can’t log into St George Bank’s Internet banking right now — presumably it’s overloaded with people like me doing their 30 June thing. So instead I’ll continue the story of moving to Westpac.

After that initial meeting, the cards and PINs and other stuff duly arrived — and as usual the cards didn’t record my name correctly. Now I’m OK with that, having only one name is more than a little unusual. And besides, I’ve never found it useful getting angry when something’s a simple mistake. After all, you want people to help you, and berating them won’t increase their chances of fixing your problem.

So I popped into the local branch to get it sorted.

The staff were friendly and helpful. And they were confident they’d made the right changes to get it fixed. But alas, yesterday one of the replacement cards arrived, and it still had me listed as “Stilgherrian Stilgherrian”. Back to the drawing board…

The test now will be to see how Westpac deal with this. Stay tuned…

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Unfortunate Name 1

Stilgherrian — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 06:58:59 +0000

It’s Friday afternoon, it’s the end of the financial year, so a little irreverence is acceptable — if not compulsory. So here’s a link to story about a ship with an unfortunate name.

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MYOB, you’re dumped! Hello NetAccounts

Stilgherrian — Fri, 29 Jun 2007 03:23:50 +0000

Marc Lehmann, you just scored your business Saasu a new customer because you commented on my gripes about MYOB. We’ve just made the decision to run my business with NetAccounts.

Marc, there was a steady flow of “Gee, wow!” moments as we looked at how NetAccounts might work for us — I’ll come back to that. But what really made the difference was how your company communicates. Especially when compared with MYOB…

MYOB only ever communicate with me to ask for money. Once, they were quite aggressive about it.
MYOB don’t reply to emails.
You have to wade through so much clutter to find what you want on their website.

Imagine MYOB were a person. You’d say something to them, but they’d never respond. Instead, they’d just be talking at you — either asking for money or telling you how good they were. Constantly.

You, on the other hand, joined a conversation about MYOB by talking about your product — but you added another insight and kept the conversation alive. “Well,” I thought, “if they’ve won an award and they’re clueful about blogs, maybe I should look at their product.” So I did.

And while NetAccounts certainly looked capable of doing what we needed — gawd, our accounting needs aren’t rocket science! — it was the quality and sincerity of your communication which persuaded me to take a proper look.

Your online demos are voiced by you, not some slick presenterdroid. This is reassuring.
Your website won’t win a design award, but there’s no clutter and so far I’ve quickly found everything I’ve looked for.
Saasu speaks in simple, direct language. You don’t shout about “Your business will be transformed”, you show me how I use your tool to do everyday things.

Imagine Saasu were a person. They’d be conversational, straightforward, to-the-point. All elements which build trust. All characteristics of someone you’d actually want to be involved with your business.

I’ll certainly have more to say about NetAccounts while I set it up over the weekend. But for now, my office manager Virginia Bridger had this to say after an hour or so poking around:

It’s a program that’s obviously been built knowing that human beings are going to be using it.

Oh, and Marc? I’ve just used your logo without asking first. I’m guessing that you won’t mind, given the context.

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Explain the rules, plainly

Stilgherrian — Wed, 27 Jun 2007 06:57:06 +0000

It may seem obvious, but if you want your clients to behave in a certain way, why not just tell them? Open honest communication really is the way to go.

That’s why I was thrilled to see the following message in a newsletter from my chiropractor:

Missed appointments and late cancellations — our solution

Missed appointments and late cancellations are an inconvenience not only for us, but also for other clients who may have wanted your appointment time and miss out. So in future missed appointments and cancellations on the same day will be handled as follows:

1st missed appt: We understand, anyone can forget once.

2nd missed appt: We’re not very happy — a gift (wine or flowers etc) is required to appease us. Or we will donate your “Missed appointment fee” to charity.

3rd missed appt: Our regular fee will apply.

4th missed appt: Our regular fee will apply and we won’t make any more appointments for you.

What a superb piece of writing, too. It’s friendly and conversational, but it’s also laying down the law.

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Crikey editorial slams Howard, Rudd over Aboriginal intervention

Stilgherrian — Wed, 27 Jun 2007 04:29:58 +0000

The best summary of the cynicism and nastiness of John Howard’s War on Indigenous Unpleasantness I’ve seen so far is the Crikey editorial today, written by Sydney journalist Alex Mitchell:

This is the last throw of the dice for John Howard. He is doing one big favour for the mining industry which he has faithfully served in public life for the past 30 years by rolling back Aboriginal ownership of their tribal lands. Cynically, cruelly but utterly predictably, he’s doing it under the hypocritical colours of humanitarianism. (Very similar to the invasion and occupation of Iraq sold as “spreading democracy”)… He is being aided and abetted by Kevin Rudd’s craven behaviour… Rudd has vacated leadership on the tragic issue of rescuing Aboriginal communities and given Howard the opportunity to play his sickening Father of the Nation role. Paul Keating, you were right about the Rudd team of fixers, hucksters, flyweights and spineless opportunists.

That’s just a taste. The full version is well worth it.

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Condoleezza plays mum

Stilgherrian — Tue, 26 Jun 2007 20:58:32 +0000

It’s nice to see gender roles reinforced, isn’t it? Even though Condoleezza Rice is arguably the most powerful woman in the world, she’s still picking fluff off George W’s jacket.

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Human Rights: a reminder

Stilgherrian — Mon, 25 Jun 2007 22:49:09 +0000

I’ve had this sitting on the back burner for a while but I think it’s worth publishing today — given John Howard’s outrageous War on Indigenous Unpleasantness. Please read (or at least skim) the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, adopted by the newly-formed United Nations in 1948. After the bloodshed of the Second World War, virtually every nation on the planet understood that these values were What It Was All About.

To emphasize the key themes, I’ve used TagCrowd to make a tag cloud of the Declaration. Note, Gentle Reader, the most-repeated word of all: everyone.

created at TagCrowd.com

Now you can perhaps argue about the details. P J O’Rourke, for example, reckons:

All men are created equal. We hold this truth to the self-evident, which on the face of it is so wildly untrue. Equality is the foundation of liberal democracy, rule of law, a free society, and everything that the reader, if he or she is sane, cherishes. But are we all equal because we all showed up? It does not work that way at weddings or funerals. Are we all equal because it says so in the American Declaration of Independence, the French Declaration of the Rights of Man, and the UN Universal Declaration of Human Rights? Each of these documents contains plenty of half-truths and nontruths as well. The UN proclaims, “Everyone has the right to rest and leisure, including reasonable limitation of working hours.” I’ll have my wife inform the baby.

High-minded screeds cobbled together by unrepresentative and, in some cases, slightly deranged members of the intelligentsia are not scripture. Anyway, to see what a scripture-based polity gets for a social system we have only to look at the Taliban in Afghanistan or the Puritans in Massachusetts.

But the core words stand out so brightly in that TagCloud. And those core words are being ignored by John Howard’s cynical intervention.

Perhaps you should ask your local MP why so few of them have been enshrined in Australian law and what they, personally, have done about that.

If they’re a Coalition MP, perhaps you should ask them why they’re being party to such a disgusting, heavy-handed approach to what is, yes, a major problem — but a problem which has been sitting there for the entire time they’ve been in government.

Production Note

TagCrowd has already removed common stop words like “the” and “of”. I’ve added a few more so the focus is on the content not the structure: “against”, “article”, “declaration”, “forth”, “held”, “including”, “nor”, “proclaimed”, “promote”, “shall” and “whereas”.

I’ve added a bunch of words to that list to remove things which are about the structure of the Declaration rather than the content, such as “whereas”.

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You can follow the comments too

Stilgherrian — Mon, 25 Jun 2007 07:35:26 +0000

It just occurred to me that people reading this website in a feed reader may be missing half the action: the rather excellent comments (and the dodgy ones too). So, a reminder. Apart from the RSS feed of the posts, there’s also a feed of the comments. And if you have no idea what that means, well… I was going to link to an explanation but all those I found were too geeky.

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Thanksgiving With the Kranzes

Stilgherrian — Mon, 25 Jun 2007 00:50:11 +0000

Yeah OK, it was mentioned in the comments, but the movie Thanksgiving With the Kranzes deserves its own post. It’s a superb satire on Ron Howard’s Apollo 13. 18 minutes well spent. And it ties in nicely with my posts about the oven crash and failure IS an option. Now back to work…

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Releasing the Black Hawk crash video was A Good Thing

Stilgherrian — Sun, 24 Jun 2007 22:07:27 +0000

An open letter to family and friends of those who died in the crash of the Black Hawk helicopter on HMAS Kanimbla, and to those who survived.

I understand why you didn’t want the crash video made public. Every time you see it, you’ll re-live that crash. And every time, you’ll feel that black void of horror creeping back up into your mind. The horror may stay with you for years. It’s pretty fucked, I know.

But despite the on-going pain it inevitably causes, I think it’s not only reasonable that such videos be made public, I think it’s essential.

In 1992, there was another accident. During an army live-fire exercise, an assault rifle accidentally discharged and a soldier died. A very good friend of mine was holding that rifle. And while both a military inquiry and a civilian coronial inquest agreed it was an accident and found my friend blameless, the post-traumatic stress and guilt stayed with him for years — to the point where it became unbearable and he hanged himself at the end of 1996.

His parents were devastated. I wasn’t too thrilled either, having cut him down from the tree in my back yard and, later, helped carry him to his grave.

Some of us reckon the army hadn’t taken proper care of one of their own. The 2005 Senate inquiry into the The effectiveness of Australia’s military justice system agreed.

As a direct result of Senate recommendations, the inquiry into the Black Hawk crash was headed by a civilian judge — the first time that’d happened. And that judge declared the video should be released. It was right and proper that he do so.

Secrecy provides a breeding-ground for corruption.

Secrecy can be used to cover up incompetence.

Secrecy is, of course, essential in many military operations. But when it comes to finding out why a perfectly good helicopter slammed into the deck of a ship and then dragged two fine men to their deaths, secrecy has no place. Justice needs to be done — out of respect to those men, and out of respect to every man and woman who chooses to serve the Australian people in the armed forces.

Justice not only needs to be done, we need to see that it’s being done — and that means putting the evidence on the public record.

I’m sorry you’ve had to re-live the disaster. I know even reading this letter will hurt. I’ll have trouble sleeping tonight too, having re-lived my own story. That’s the price of Justice. It’s worth paying.

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Failure IS an option

Stilgherrian — Sun, 24 Jun 2007 22:02:52 +0000

Hugh MacLeod has written a great little piece pointing out that bravado about “Failure is not an option” is just stupid. I also like some of the comments from readers:

“Failure is not an option” people are invariably the ones least willing to deliver the intellectual and physical juice to lessen the probability of failure.
“Failure is not an option” people are invariably the same people who said, two paragraphs earlier, that they want bold, risk-taking approaches.

Failure is always an option, which of course you want to avoid, But if failure is inevitable, then fail fast — and then adapt.

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Oven crashes: technology gone mad

Stilgherrian — Sun, 24 Jun 2007 22:01:29 +0000

Last night I had to re-boot the oven because it had crashed. I only wanted to grill a couple of tomatoes for our dinner. Does it really require that amount of computational complexity?

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Trash sculptures

Stilgherrian — Sun, 24 Jun 2007 13:17:10 +0000

I’ve been very serious today so the time’s come for something a little more light-hearted — sculptures of garbage that, when looked at from exactly the right angle, form a silhouette of the artists.

Thanks to Signal vs Noise for the link.

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Note to Aust military: tell us about brave deeds

Stilgherrian — Sun, 24 Jun 2007 07:10:04 +0000

Why was this story of Aussie bravery kept quiet for two and a half years?

Dear Department of Defence, if it’s worth awarding two Distinguished Service Medals for, it’s a story worth telling. Particularly as Australia involves itself in politically unpopular wars and the boys and girls who put their lives on the line need our support.

Surely you can tell enough of the story to inspire the kiddies without “revealing operational secrets”. Hell, I’d love to record this kind of oral history!

Releasing the news this week makes it look like you’re trying to distract us from that awful helicopter crash.

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Howard’s concern seems genuine — genuine spin, that is

Stilgherrian — Sun, 24 Jun 2007 06:45:16 +0000

John Howard’s racist intervention into the management of Aboriginal child sex abuse cases seems to be based on genuine personal shock, at least according to one feature story yesterday:

“I thought the report was just horrific,” he said yesterday. “This is very genuine. I am distressed. It is terrible. Little children. Don’t underestimate the personal interest and commitment to this. Or Mal Brough [Howard's Minister for Indigenous Affairs]. He is quite passionate about doing something on this subject. I said to him, ‘We’ve got to do something, we’ve got to grab hold of this. The territory’s not going to do anything.’”

But once that’s out of the way, the spin begins:

“It’s just terrible. Just imagine if it was Dickson, or Brunswick or Marrickville or whatever. It’s just intolerable and you’ve just got to do something about it.

Cute choice of examples, Mr Howard. I don’t know about Dickson (are you reading this, Antony Green?), but I live in the Marrickville electorate and Brunswick is the Melbourne equivalent — both multicultural Labour-voting areas.

Howard’s choice is 100% political. Mention left-wing heartlands so those on the left take the example personally and sympathise with the pain, and those on the right are reminded that these mixed-race communities are a hotbed of sordidness. He certainly doesn’t say “Just imagine if it was Mosman or Elsternwick.”

I mean, there’s no child sexual abuse in suburbs with deciduous trees, and Howard wouldn’t risk upsetting core Liberal party voters by even suggesting it were possible.

Howard doesn’t mention that the Little Children are Sacred report is the 13th enquiry into Aboriginal child sexual abuse since he became PM — three of them federal enquiries!

He doesn’t mention that NT chief minister Clare Martin proposed an interventionist solution a year ago — which he ignored.

He doesn’t mention that federal funding to tackle this issue was cut 4 years ago.

But he does keep emphasizing that he’s taking control, that he’s in control, that once more he’s Big Strong Daddy.

And as I write that a sudden thought crosses my mind. Isn’t Big Strong Daddy the one committing most child sexual abuse?

[P.S. There's interesting comments on this issue attached to my original post. Enjoy.]