Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

December 2008

Oh dear. That seminar’s presentation is in PoweProint. With bullets. And slow reveals. And everything it shouldn’t have. I am ashamed.

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RT @SnarkyPlatypus: US consumer confidence at lowest recorded level since records started in 1967 http://is.gd/eeua Well yes…

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@SnarkyPlatypus Maybe I should dust off the “Effective Comms” seminar I did for IBM Asia-Pacific about writing like an actual human.

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@SnarkyPlatypus Oh not just that article! Almost EVERYTHING written about telcos is full of moronic jargon and empty clches.

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RT @M_Hickinbotham: Fortune: ‘The future of wireless is Down Under’. Profiles Telstra Next G. http://is.gd/eetL [Bonus Trujillo hagiography]

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@andrewbarnett Actually I’m rather good this morning, the best I’ve felt all week actually. I’m hoping this is a Sign.

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RT @andrewbarnett: It’s OK - after some shaking, netbank woke, threw up in a bucket, then got to work

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Codeine FTW! (Oh… No exclamation marks, please. They hurt.)

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RT @andrewbarnett: netbank is clearly still passed out on the back lawn :-/

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RT @shelisrael: Here’s a real idiotic thought: Peace on Earth. Goodwill to humankind. That ought to leave some folk rolling in the aisles.

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@ApostrophePong Good morning. “Ask not what 2009 can do for you, but what you can do for 2009”, you mean?

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@seancarmody @jeffsonstein Hi chaps, and Happy New Year. :) I think I’ll have to do a generic HNY message to get thru the day.

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Emerges, in a New Year. so, this is 2009. It’s quiet.

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RT @josh909: Does everyone else feel that the world would be a better place without Andrew G? [Yes. Definitely.]

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So, we’re watching “Razzle Dazzle”, and @ApostrophePong is threating to play all the songs on . Be afraid.

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Going off-grid to enjoy @ApostrophePong’s Masaman Curry and whatever dodgy drinks are in the fridge.

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@SnarkyPlatypus: “People who weren’t on the whiteboard were a: offended, b: a platypus and c: wanted an avatar as well.” http://is.gd/efSD

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Definitely mouthwash.

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@Nickhodge Does not your son have, like, school to go to?

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@firstdogonmoon Congratulations on an AMAZING series of avatars, Sir!

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@Nickhodge I want to get away from being a sysadmin but then yesterday someone offered to pass me all his clients and like, good $. [sigh]

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@Nickhodge One night I typed “halt” into the wrong Linux shell. Remote machine. Saturday night. Emergency sysadmin callout $600 kthxbai.

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Because I am a grown-up geek, I am permitted to use “screenshot” as a verb.

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@Nickhodge Look, Nick! I said “Thank you, Windows Server 2003”. http://is.gd/efz7 Screenshot that one, you don’t see it every day!

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Thank you, Windows Server 2003, for warning me “Shutdown” requires a human at the remote location to start the computer. “Restart” please.

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@Nickhodge @StuartLivesey Not paranoia. As you both know, HDDs can fail totally without warning. This must be done NOW.

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Upgrading a client’s server backup software. Yes, you heard me. NYE. But do you really want to run with no backups running?

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@ApostrophePong reports that the “Upsinthe Euphorizer” absinthe lemon soda pre-mixed drink tastes like mouthwash. http://is.gd/efjr

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@ZebraBites The teapot has gone. Actually, there never was a teapot. People are going crazy at year’s end. Madness, I tell you!

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RT @ikostar: @stilgherrian Well the psychedelic pseagull was the best avatar on the whole internet. [Better change back then!]

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@shanegold @ZebraBites There’s a story behind the teapot, but maybe for another day. Should I revert to psychedelic pseagull?

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@bengrubb Well the quoted speeds ARE maximums. Just like a car sold as “can do 180km/h” won’t actually achieve that on Parramatta Road.

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@bengrubb I think @duncanriley wants to talk about Next G to someone who isn’t on Telstra’s payroll. Real-world speeds, not brochurehype. ;)

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Those of you with idle hands (and eyes) may like to look at @ApostrophePong’s selection of 2008 photographs. http://is.gd/ef21

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@garthk What you are seeing sounds like the Czech-built L39 Albatros. http://is.gd/ef0i [scroll down]

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I don’t think it’s an obscure avatar at all!

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@SnarkyPlatypus @NathanaelB Australia has a two-tiered legal system too. All of us, and then Justice Einfeld.

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Documentation complete. Desk not really presentable, but Care Factor plummeting. Can has gin?

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@dizzystuff Your new avatar… That posture… Can you blow bubbles from that position? Just askin’…

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@TheJamesGlover I’ve been told to follow you. Poor bastard.

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And now REALLY back to writing that documentation!

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@M_Hickinbotham I haven’t really thought it through and my brain is elsewhere today, bu do remind me to come back to these thoughts!

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@ELROSS True, I have sympathy for anyone who is represented by Budd. :/

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@M_Hickinbotham Agreed, decent mobile broadband helps SMEs. But most can barely use the tools they already have. Time to help ‘em catch up?

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@waferbaby If you keep seeing me on King St (where I am many days) you should so more than just look. :P

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Enough frivolity and plummeting consumer confidence! Time to write some documentation. Baxoon.

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@ELROSS Ah! The Special Bitter must be dishwater with Angostura. [nods] Now I understand!

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@ELROSS @seancarmody Recommending Coopers over Fosters? I’d recommend stale dishwater over Fosters. If one could tell the difference.

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@zbender Oh the core premise is OK: Next G is certainly a good network. But for Fortune it seems a bit of a light touch.

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@M_Hickinbotham If we ran a diff between that Fortune piece and your original media release, how many changes would it reveal? ;)

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@ApostrophePong Nah we get those guys t handle all the t-shirt-making and we just take royalties.

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@ApostrophePong To link to SBS media you can’t use http://is.gd ‘cos it don’t handle the in the URL. :/ Use http://tinyurl.com

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@andrewbarnett You suspect wrong. I would never endorse @thefuckingpope. We are all popes. All hail Eris!

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RT @ApostrophePong: @stilgherrian King Cnut has already been ™. :( http://www.kingcnut.com [Botheration.]

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Le Bake on Enmore Rd will be open on New Year’s Day with freshly-baked bread. “We open. We bake. You buy. You eat.” Deal!

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@SnarkyPlatypus Maybe you need to go work for News Corp. @jg_rat seems to find your perspective, erm, invaluable.

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RT @SnarkyPlatypus: I for one look forward to being recycled like a cheap paper mache pinata

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@dizzystuff When will you answer the question I posted on your photo? http://tinyurl.com/8ncgs9 [Facebook link]

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Hmmm… That’s going to put me into a very introspective mood today!

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Wed plan (loosely): AM desk triage & client documentation; PM write end-of-year blog post & client email; NYE dinn@ApostrophePongophePong.

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@shortyawards So, when you say nominations close at “midnight, December 31st”, you mean UTC, right? Unspecified is UTC. No? what then? ;)

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Emerges for the last time in 2008. Oblique Strategies says “Be dirty”. OK then.

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@wraptinweb I acknowledge your serious link and will read in the morning. Web 2.0 people are now vital but not appreciated http://is.gd/eaaO

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OH: Virginia Trioli is just a bit of random minge.

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@dedlam I’d never scream out a window, it’s not harmonious. ;)

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@erkpod Ah, but it all depends on the “scale” of the typography. Haw haw haw.

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Gym done. Courthouse Hotel packed, skipped. Carlisle Castle less-packed. There is a fish called Mahi-Mahi with my name on it, soon.

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OH: I don’t really blame you for going up and saying “Oh yeah, ah, errrr.”

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OH: Everybody wants to be Malcolm Turnbull. @TurnbullMalcolm, this was in Newtown!

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(And let no-one say they weren’t thinking it too.)

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@JonoH Sorry, did you say “Hot and sweaty”? [perks up]

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DEAR EVERYBODY IN THE ENTIRE STREET, NO-ONE CARES WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT THE COLOUR OF ANYTHING JUST FUCK OFF OUT OF THE FUCKING WAY! JESUS!

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Newtown. Hot. Sweaty. Horny. No, not horny. Grumpy. And annoyed. Hot. Sweaty. Yeah.

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@Alegrya So you’re about to arrive Macdonaldtown?

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@oliyoung It might slow the trains but oh! So totally worth it!

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When a train finally arrives, I’d like to push that ugly child in front of it.

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City loop trains late and out of order. Loop was closed 25 mins ‘cos guy threatened self-harm. Quicker to shoot him, I say.

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@NathanaelB Good to see the phear has hit you already. No philter yet, but self-censor against its imagined power.

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Slowly tubeworming home. Trying to feign enthusiasm for the gym.

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@ragnarok1971 That, Sir, is a disturbing collection of people! ;)

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@garthk No, fuck it. no re-coding of the video. It’s over. We’ll create something new in that time instead.

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@comedy_nerd Well I have once said that an Exchange server is like your business’ compost heap. “Midden” works too.

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Exchange migration complete. Client happy. Stomach empty. You know what that means…!

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Mmmmm… Pod people…

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Exchange is being a pain in the arse. Who knew?

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I can has laptop. Latest glitch: it’s not set up for the Exchange server from which we’re migrating. Can has login details kthxbai.

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@mpesce Ahem, Good Sir. I did not, as you quaintly put it, “throw a tanty”. I would never do that. It was a polite enquiry.

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@einspruch I think the combination of recommending Reiki and a song by Yes is definitely happy territory, ;)

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@barrysaunders “Can The Internet Save The World?” is a fine article, though it links to me? I think not! http://idek.net/1AF

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@trib Oh there are things I can do, but it’s not the order of play I’d prepared for. It requires me to Change.

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@DavidFeng Alas if I only do virtual repairs I may only get paid virtual money.

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On site at Darlinghurst. The laptop I’m about to reconfigure is not physically present. Superb.

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@thetowncrier Agreed. Saw “Frost/Nixon” yesterday and it’s awesome. And funny. Great moofie.

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@garthk Hamas and humus are not the same thing, right?

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@seancarmody Some words are innately funny. http://is.gd/dVRi “Hovercraft” isn’t on the list but it should be. “Eels” was icing on the cake.

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@JohnCleese The consensus seems to be that it is INNATELY funny to say “full of bees”. I, however, blame YOU and Rowan Atkinson personally.

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@franksting It may be “SOOOO wrong”, but not as wrong as http://santasm.net ;)

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Now, is it innately funny to say “full of bees”, or only when @JohnCleese or Rowan Atkinson say it? http://is.gd/dVJq

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@ecoknowgrapher Thank you for your compliments about my Christmas Message too, Sir! It is going to be an annual tradition now.

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RT @earleyedition: [This] looks like @stilgherrian and @Colgo caught in an intimate moment. http://is.gd/dVF3

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@drunkenmadman Twitter IS a hive mind, yes, but your hive currently has like 4 bees. You need more bees.

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@SnarkyPlatypus @Nickhodge AsiaVision is going to be SO FULL OF WIN! http://is.gd/dVzs Like that msuic video over dinner last night.

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@garthk I have already copied the vid to another drive. I want it to take up moar lesseror spacez on that drive.

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@kcarruthers @franksting I think it helps if you also nominate at @shortyawards so @firstdogonmoon makes the finals.

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Oh. I can’t log into Microsoft Live Messenger. That’s gotta be a bonus.

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Um, no, .zip compressing 40GB of raw video footage shall not take 231 hours thank you very much, you can do it later.

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I notice that my nomination does not appear to have happened yet… [taps table]

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@shortyawards I nominate @firstdogonmoon for a Shorty Award in because his charming cartoon avatars are taking over the world.

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@oliyoung Intel’s MD mobile Internet device? New for me, thank you, I’ll check it out.

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@seamus Wow the Modbook is a rather impressive-looking concept! Turn your macBook Pro into a tablet! http://is.gd/22DD

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@Tarale And there is already an Apple tablet. It’s called the iPhone. ;) Want more surface? Glue a few together. Steve will love you for it.

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@Tarale Evolution is all about niches. Niche markets are good. One Product To Rule Them All is old-fashioned.

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@klintron [shrugs] Tools for jobs. There’ll be lotsa folks who bought OLPC XOs who end up hating them ‘cos [surprise!] they’re not 6yo.

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(There seems to be a lot of stuff in the IT world which, unless it reaches 95% global market share, is tagged “failure”. Like cancer.)

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@klintron In what way as the tablet PC “failed”? I have clients who use them as an essential part of their workflows.

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I am liking some of the suggestions coming in for “Gname the Gnome!” http://is.gd/dUzy

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@Nickhodge Dear Mr Hodge. I said “Sennheiser” not “Spandau” http://is.gd/dUXZ kthxbai. Tho a Sten gun… http://is.gd/dUYd

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If I dismantle this Sennheiser microphone, will I be able to put it back together?

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@Nickhodge The WD HDD is now Apple format. Time Machine is backing up my MacBook Pro not for the first time ever honestly. That’d be slack.

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New blog post: “Gname the Gnome!” http://is.gd/dUzy Very, very important stuff!

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@monnie Yes, I may well burn the printer. That’d make a good video actually! Toxic as all fuck though.

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@TwoDogs Oh I TRIED selling that Lexmark printer on eBay a while back. Not a single bid.

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Oh you losers Western Digital! Your terabyte My Book drive was formatted as FAT? No wonder you didn’t like my 8GB video files! LOL!

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You can’t even give away Lexmark printers, it seems. And who can blame them?

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@paulwallbank Please don’t get me started on Vista, @Nickhodge might be watching and he won’t enjoy what I say. ;)

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Does anyone want a Lexmark Z611 inkjet printer? “New” in box? Well, a couple years old. It was a freebie from some promo, sitting unused.

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I am glad an unexpected error occurred. I wouldn’t want you to expect errors to happen.

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@alicam @RuthEllison I think Orwell was somewhat obsessed with recording the minutiae of daily life. So were many then. Like logging IRC. ;)

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George Orwell is useless. He lost track of the eggs. http://is.gd/dTGU

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So, I’m a seagull.

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@wraptinweb Alas, online backups not quite suitable for us. We’re shooting HD video and can generate 30GB or 40GB of new data in a day.

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@drunkenmadman @facibus The cheap-arsed white wine will suffice for this evening. ;)

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@missdizzy As the great man once said, “If it hurts, you’re doin’ it wrong!”

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@JonoH so what are you saying? That you’d like me to take care of the Spain trip for you? Oh no problem, man, when? ;)

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So that task required talking with WebCentral, Melbourne IT, my SFO data centre and my own domain registry, Enetica. Can has gin kthxbai.

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@susan_m Oh Bindi’s harmless. If a croc is to be released, point it in the general direction of her mother.

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@garthk @jdub So what do your brains have in common that you had foreground/background swap when looking at my avatar?

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@JonoH Oh it’d be easy to round up the Aussie Twitterers… just grab a couple of those Cessna Citations you love so much. And gin. ;)

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RT @garthk: @stilgherrian, my eyes are falling out. I was reading your avatar background as its foreground. Ow ow ow. Ow.

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@KateRichardson Thank you. Like so many new avatars, it’s the work of @firstdogonmoon. He’s clever.

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RT @theinquisitr: “Do Not Want: Bindi Irwin Doll” - http://tinyurl.com/9nvrt9 [Can we buy them and release them into the wild?]

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@earleyedition I appreciate the alleged pic of me and @Colgo being intimate, but http://is.gd/dXn6 clearly shows a pigeon, not a seagull. ;)

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@Nickhodge [smirks] Yes, @PeterBlackQUT and I have met a couple of times and we both pretend to have enjoyed it.

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@PeterBlackQUT Yes, when I need psychological advice I’d naturally turn to a… lawyer. :P

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@kcarruthers Yeah lemurs may be cute, but if I just took my advice from whatever it was that was cute then my life would be… oh… wait.

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@kcarruthers So explain to me again, why we are taking advice from a lemur?

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RT @DDsD: Teenagers who skip breakfast ‘more likely to have sex’ - New Japanese Study Claims - http://tinyurl.com/8lav2o

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Hmmm… I don’t known whether to leave my avatar as the gnome or the psychedelic pseagull.

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@kcarruthers Of course I didn’t miss your irony. I’ve been nominated for an award in irony. http://bit.ly/T8KF

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@kcarruthers Oh noes, is someone ELSE confusing “authority” with “popularity” or “well-linked”? “It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.”

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@fictillius Oh. alas, the only response I can think of is unprintable. Even by my standards. Maybe I’ll talk about seedless grapes instead.

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@fictillius Yeah the extra ” ” should be OK. Unless you’re gay.

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@fictillius Yeah that last tweet needs work. And an extra space. Still, I like your koala.

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@fictillius When you’re onTwitter, no-one knows you’re really masturbating on the train.

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@firstdogonmoon You’re number 5 nominee for the Shorty Awards design category now. http://is.gd/b4Z5

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@brandstaetter Some news services choose not to use the word “terrorist” because it pre-judges people as guilty under anti-terrorism laws.

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There are many strange categories in the Shorty Awards. http://is.gd/cZnm I am certain to win one of them, should I be [cough] nominated.

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In amongst all this fun, there is still time for the serious business of Gnaming the Gnome. http://is.gd/dUzy

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@JonoH NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!11! Does not want strange gay sailor man from Hotel CBD. He was moar scarierer than eva!

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I can’t help but notice [cough] that I haven’t been nominated for a Shorty Award at this time, and yet there it is.

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I’m feeling a bit like Paul Eddington from “Yes Minister”. http://is.gd/dWtO

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@zuzu In Newtown, good pizza can be had at Lucky’s (I’m told). If you cross the border to Enmore then San Remo on Enmore Rd is awesome.

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@rbuerckner I have NO IDEA what my avatar is doing. In that sense, it is completely appropriate.

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I see @firstdogonmoon is at number 11 and rising! http://is.gd/b4Z5 More nominations required for Top 10 stats.

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@Nickhodge Exactly. @mpesce will come back from his afternoon granny-nap and bewilderment will set in. Early-onset dementia is so sad.

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@SnarkyPlatypus I do like the phrase “psychedelic pseagull” too.

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RT @misswired: At Kelly’s with @Alegrya. No surprises. [Agreed. No surprises there at all.]

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Oh the end of my beak is cut off! And anyone following this hours later will wonder WTF it’s all about.

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@SnarkyPlatypus White-green colour blind. [nods] I am also cheese-cocaine blind.

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@Nickhodge If you’re REALLY lucky I might show you my Circular Quay!

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Liking the bright, saturated colours I’m starting to see in Twitteravatars today.

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RT @chrismoreschi: 30 wordpress video tutorials. Good stuff here. http://bit.ly/cmmb

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RT @robcorr: Kids who want to have sex will, but if not taught about contraception they won’t use it. Who woulda thought? http://is.gd/e46y

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@markc May I ask what things you request Wotnews to send you if you’re sent THAT?

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RT @markc: Wotnews sent me this as their #1 link in their email this morning http://tinyurl.com/a7a3v3 :) [Oh hai, @genrobey!]

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@middleclassgirl “Goat dominatrix”? Hah! Try THIS search for size then! http://is.gd/e3Yx (Definitely NSFW!)

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@SnarkyPlatypus Everything about me is appropriate, not just my avatar.

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RT @garthk: @stilgherrian, you make an excellent Mysterious Oracle Hidden Under a Tree Root. Just sayin’.

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So, Outlook XP on old computer, you’ve decided to crash. I hate you. I hate @SnarkyPlatypus too, but he has other uses so don’t tell him.

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