The Under the Blue Moon Festival gurgles along on Enmore Rd, with sausage sizzle open day at the undertakers.
Mobile (again): Enmore Rd; King St; @SnarkyPlatypus; gym; late lunch. My attention may be limited.
@drearyclocks Exactly. And well all feel like a man’s man occasionally. No. Wait.
@drearyclocks If Jess had just said up front that he drove a Hummer ‘cos he liked it, it’d be fine. But he wanted to JUSTIFY it. Fail.
@drearyclocks Ah yes, the whole HUMMER to WANKER puzzle generated some great comments. http://bit.ly/3e9Chw
Digital ants could be the future of information security. http://bit.ly/O9aA
@drearyclocks Me being a Google result for “McDonalds Waterloo Australia” is spurious and will soon pass. Good trick, nonetheless.
@iain_chalmers Alas no coffee in the CBD for me. I am already on the train back home. On target for gym at 1400.
This tweet is brought to you live from the Apple Store Genuis Bar, while I await the arrival of the new power supply. Oh here it is now!
I patiently await my moment with a Genius. It takes a Genius to see the power supply’s broken cable and get a new one from the shelf.
@maverickwoman A black polo-neck would just make me look like a Wiggle in mourning. Or a Norwegian Wiggle.
I suppose you could combine all that into a carnivorous tree snuff movie.
I do not like the slogan “Hot and Ready” for selling meat pies. The tomato sauce looks too much like blood.
So how come trees are allowed to spray pollen everywhere, but that time I just … ?
Mobile: Stanmore station; Wynyard station; Temple of Apple; Wynyard station; Stanmore station; home. Standby for Part 2.
“The men may have been under the influence of alcohol when they devised the idea for their disguises.” Heh.
RT @JonoH: http://bit.ly/4fEkXR <— worst disguise ever, c’mon lads, for a robbery???! [Gotta admit, it works for me.]
@Nickhodge There are only five things I feel compelled to do. None of them involve a Windows 7 t-shirt. Only one involves you.
@SnarkyPlatypus Si Steve ne fait pas me sentir mieux, je vais me plaindre. Fort.
I appreciate all your suggestions, and @ApostrophePong’s to wear a Windows7 t-shirt, but I shall ignore them all.
Hmmm… I have to go to the Apple Store, but I have nothing to wear!
RT @CADbloke: Passing of time is bi-cubically proportional to proximity of your closest, possibly-unrelated deadline. [Wanky, but true.]
@jilliancyork Oh. You were asking about the other study, the date-rape drug one. That’s enough research for me on a Sunday tho. ;)
Prof David Nutt: “Estimating drug harms: a risky business?” http://bit.ly/1o4Dc9 [Less snarkily-tweeted link.]
@jilliancyork I reckon Prof Nutt’s paper would be very easy to find, since it was an academic publication. Oh, look! ;) http://bit.ly/1o4Dc9
“Date-rape drink spiking ‘an urban legend’,” they’re just drunk. http://bit.ly/1Ghz0y
UK drug chief who spoke about relative safety of illegal drugs http://bit.ly/13FtQb has been sacked http://bit.ly/7pujY
Former Assistant Police Chief deconstructs US TSA’s flawed processes. http://bit.ly/1YMiOK
If we’re both to pass law school, we must have wild sex immediately. http://bit.ly/2nRzbQ
Emerges.
Definitely exit time. [nods] [exit]
That’s enough linguistic research for a Saturday night. I’m meant to be asleep anyway.
@SnarkyPlatypus ROFL! “The Modern Monotreme: Magic or Minger?”
I’ve founf a guy who named his boat “Savage Minger” but I don’t think that counts.
Aha! The Vine: “The minger ginger from Girls Aloud actually looks pretty neat for a change.” http://bit.ly/maC4T
I wonder if reviewing an LG TV as “Not a minger” counts? http://bit.ly/2vfGA1
Here’s one! Brisbane Times: “… but here are some of my personal favourite sporting mingers… ” http://bit.ly/1aCgAK Need two more.
@glengyron Interestingly, I searched news.com.au and smh.com.au and “minger” only appears in comments, which isn’t good enough.
@glengyron “English slang is English”, yes, but Australian slang is Australian and comes from many sources, including English.
@einspruch It’s not so much finding the definition, tho http://j.mp/1FXnVE are good. It’s citing it in Australian usage. That’ll be easy.
@glengyron The Macquarie is certainly open to corrections, with appropriate evidence. I know this from having been involved in one myself.
@SnarkyPlatypus From 2007, “BBC flashes Kylie Minogue’s minge at innocent kiddies” http://bit.ly/3XMeNy
@SnarkyPlatypus BTW, “minge” is “Romani but also Suffolk dialect”. So there you go.
@SnarkyPlatypus Yeah I’m finding enough references in random searches that I reckon I’ll be able to do it properly for the Macquarie.
@SnarkyPlatypus The Macquarie Dictionary doesn’t have “minger”. This needs to be rectified.
@SnarkyPlatypus “Is your client a Capricorn, by any chance?”
@kcarruthers Look, try explaining your fancy “other hemisphere” thinking to the mingers in cheap witches’ hats and see how far you get!
@SnarkyPlatypus I think you were thinking of Samhain. http://bit.ly/MxTH5 Or maybe it’s just the sangria talking.
@SnarkyPlatypus Erm, Beltane is May Day. http://bit.ly/pqeID You’ll need to find a Pole to dance around.
@anthonybaxter Actually, you know who’d be even better at portraying me in film than Will Smith? http://bit.ly/1kHktY
@SnarkyPlatypus I trust that you have upheld the Glebe Dining Code of Honour.
Pictures of the Ares I-X launch at @big_picture. http://bit.ly/28vkpM
Dinner.
Maybe being a Venturer Scout was bad for me, All that “Be Prepared” stuff and first aid and taking responsibility instead of being a sheep.
@auntie_abc I live in fear of having a heart attack or stroke while surrounded by morons who don’t have the sense to call an ambulance.
@WoollyMittens The sniffy sniffy dogs rarely find anything interesting. http://bit.ly/1dGoPx
I may be overstating the risk to little girl. But she’d strayed beyond the fence, wasn’t visible to parents, following pigeon onto road.
BTW, if anyone wants to take advantage of this surge of testosterone, you know where to find me. Just sayin’…
@eddit0r Oddly enough, when I told Kylie on Police 000 the guy was on the ground with a hand around his throat, “Nice day for it,” she said.
@FortuneGrey Mate, if I don’t pimp myself then no-one else will. It’s purely pragmatism.
Oh, I also saved a 4yo girl from being run over by a car today. She’d strayed from a parkland birthday party. So I’m a double hero. :P
@retrogrrl @middleclassgirl The police sniffy sniffy dogs have an easy gig. Who am I to begrudge them their tail-wagging?
The police thing: I observed street violence from the gym window. Gawkers watched but didn’t act. I called the police. I am such a hero.
@regolith I don’t even know what an “Oxford St stab” means, and perhaps I am grateful for that.
Home, on a humid spring night as the sun sets, and pondering how many of my messages to reply to.
Police sniffy sniffy dogs working King St, Newtown, always look so perky and cheerful.
OH: “i’m just waiting for someone to form an S Club 7 cover band.” Alright, it was @SnarkyPlatypus.
They preen.
OH: “You feel really naughty, it’s a full orgasmic feeling. But it’s totally safe.”
OK, the police had to be called. And before you ask, I was the caller not the callee.
The man on the exercise bike next to me is actually reading the SMH real estate supplement. I want to stab him.
Newtown Square is full of gothlings in their finery. Wish I had shares in black eyeliner.
@SnarkyPlatypus As I told @kcarruthers, try your fancy-pants “southern hemisphere” thinking on the ignorant mob in cheap witches’ hats.
“What price the pace of modern life?” http://bit.ly/2L6FOD
Sun plan: With @ApostrophePong to Marrickville Markets for brunch; a day of writing, ‘cos I’m behind schedule. Should find somewhere nice.
@Lilylauren @SnarkyPlatypus Indeed, the Christmas Tree Hotel in Mwanza, Tanzania, has a tree all year round!
So, @ApostrophePong is wandering the house singing this song. http://bit.ly/3PdNq3 What have I done to deserve this?
@SnarkyPlatypus Oui. La poudre blanche fait tout mieux. Je hoche la tête, sciemment.
@SnarkyPlatypus As humans, we seem to be very good at launching crusades against imaginary fears.
@jilliancyork Actually, “Embodying Uncertainty: Understanding Heightened Perceptions of Drink Spiking” http://bit.ly/46dlhX
@SnarkyPlatypus Bonjour. Je suis arrivé avec La Merveille de la Science. Aussi, le café. Et vous?
Oh bugger it, here it is: “Embodying Uncertainty: Understanding Heightened Perceptions of Drink Spiking” http://bit.ly/46dlhX
@Warlach Twitter Lists will spur another round of pseudo-analysis of “influence”. Shits me beyond belief.
@pressdarling So which shits you more? Being listed as “amusing” or an “influencer”? http://bit.ly/ybX5X
My interest has been logged.
How people are choosing to categorise others for their Twitter “lists” reveals more about their own worldview than they may realise.
@franksting I suspect #shtbox has an existence beyond our mere mortal frames.
RT @jasonlangenauer: One better on the bald with long hair stakes: Mr Kidd… gay killer from Diamonds are Forever http://bit.ly/QBYdu
@drearyclocks @blonde_lili I do not understand your sexuality. But welcome to the world.
@eltonstewart Nick Cave is in a whole separate category, however. There’s still some hair there too. http://bit.ly/dfI9K
I don’t understand balding men who still try to grow long hair at the sides, emphasising their baldness. http://bit.ly/4pDtme
RT @grum: I’m so hard right now!
OH A: “Last time I was there I was on mushrooms and it was packed, and it was awesome”. B: “Acid in public is really hard.”
Two tweets ago I failed to properly balance a quote mark. I am sorry.
Oh dear. Movember was invented in Adelaide. http://bit.ly/2TREl
@SnarkyPlatypus Having just re-watched “The Shave”, it’s not “vagabond”, it’s “erotic! http://bit.ly/47Dz6e
@peterhau I dunno re Movember. Normally I’m more “just give them the money” than gimmicks, but… dunno… Am I now “celebrity”?
Wondering whether I should actually play the Movember game. http://bit.ly/PrAMx I mean, remember “The Shave”! http://bit.ly/47Dz6e
RT @dobes: iiNet’s copyright crucible heats up http://bit.ly/4Ertfd @LiamT looks at what is coming up in the AFACT v iiNet case next week.
@iain_chalmers Yes, “negative budgetary impact” was in Ben Sandiland’s Crikey piece about the Joint Strike Fighter. http://bit.ly/3dfUph
@mtats I AM NOT FUCKING WELL “QUICK TO ANGER” YOU JUDGEMENTAL PRICK! GO FUCK YOURSELF!
Thanks, @JPlatnum @aramadge @NewtonMark @GeordieGuy @iain_chalmers @mtats etc. It was, um, a rhetorical question. ;)
Why do people say “negative budgetary impact” instead of “cost”? Fools.
Mobile: Enmore Rd; King St; lunch; local errands; afternoon writingsomewhere. I am so predictable. Mostly.
@grum What sort of moose sat on your face? Was it… sexy?
SmartCompany Web Award winners: http://bit.ly/1nuIWb
@eskimo_sparky Actually, I think they should START smoking crack. Lots of it. Enough to kill them out of their idiotic obsessions.
RT @eskimo_sparky: People suggesting that “influence” will be measured by the number of lists one’s on should stop smoking crack.
@gabfran In business, lawyers seem to close everything down, fearful of “risk”. Don’t talk to customers. Don’t be open. Unhelpful IMO.
@steven_noble @mumbrell SR7 says “discretion, integrity and client confidentiality”. Shoosh! It’s all SEKRIT LAWYAZ!
How to improve your use of social media: get lawyers involved. Sigh. http://bit.ly/KxtkE HT @mumbrella
RT @ApostrophePong: Anyone else interested in Fantastic Planet [SF Film Festival] opening night at Dendy tonight? http://bit.ly/1NC24e
RT @jeamland: Replacing a bloke with a chick == positive discrimination == left-wing bias == THE IMMIGRANTS WILL STEAL MY FLATSCREEN TV
@BernardKeane Exactly. It’s weird knee-jerk logic. “Left wing” seems to be some catch-all category of “bad” used by idiots.
“CNET River”! River of news? Or undifferentiated sewer? http://bit.ly/20BXeg HT @ChrisSaad
What sort of tool thinks “left wing bias” is relevant to the ABC Good Game story (see comments)? http://bit.ly/4DvcyK
So what’s this “new analysis and opinion online initiative” the ABC is setting up? http://bit.ly/efrrh
Sat plan: 1215 Apple Store, Sydney CBD, my first time there and I hope the last; gym & food w@SnarkyPlatypusypus, probably.
@SnarkyPlatypus Bonjour. Il semble que je dois assister au palais de Steve et rendre hommage. Aussi, je me sens comme de la merde. Et vous?
I have a theory that recording and editing video makes time go even faster still. I choose not to test my theory.
Typing makes time go faster. Just that typing then has made a while 40 minutes go by, says my screen.
The lovely-sounding Gavin at Apple Support is locating a power supply that I can collect today.
@NewtonMark According to the number on my screen, I can run on batteries for almost 4 hours provided I don’t actually do anything.
That extra 3.5 hours of “sleep” was not really sleep, and I still feel… less than adequate.
@Nickhodge Canberra is the perfect place for talking about chickens. But you did choose to go there.
@franksting I am up early because my sleep patterns are completely geb0rken and I have no brain. Your excuse?
@Nickhodge I see Mr Manners hasn’t paid you a visit yet this morning.
Emerges. Actually I emerged a while ago but I didn’t want to reveal the fact. It’s a more respectable time now.
OK, shutting down computer to deal with power supply loss.
@frogworth It’s no big deal. The DC cable out of the transformer has failed to deal with wear. Apple should just replace it.
@frogworth I have AppleCare on this device so if they don’t solve it within 5 minutes I will mock them severely.
@frogworth I will attempt the Apple Store drama tomorrow. I must admit, I fear the Kool-Aid aspects of it all.
So, the power supply for my MacBook Pro is rooted. How long will my batteries last and what idiocy must I deal with to get it replaced?
Home.
@kissability I especially choose not to explore @michaelmeloni’s secret desires. Wait. Hang on.
@ordinarytanya I have no idea what you’re referring to, but “female” = “adult woman” seems a fair thing to me. What am I missing?
@kissability I choose not to explore @michaelmeloni’s crushes.
@Warlach I can create lists that serve myself using Tweetdeck’s “groups”. But the process is very flexible, like that day’s conference.
@pressdarling One can never underestimate the cluefulness of humanity. Truly. Also, are you really a “total fuckwit”?
@gabfran I would never disagree with an attractive professional woman.
@Warlach I don’t see much value for me in Twitter lists. Blindly follow people ‘cos someone else categorised them? Bah!
The ABC is seriously fucking up over this Good Game host thing. http://bit.ly/j2vkW
@jenbishopsydney I’m speaking at Media140 on 5/11 so no #prjournolove for me! :) And am I even a “journo”?
Ben Shepherd: “Can newspapers survive online?” Suggest they close down their websites! http://bit.ly/2zl4sG
UK’s chief drug adviser: Alcohol more dangerous than ecstasy, LSD and cannabis. http://bit.ly/3Spvaj
@GeordieGuy True, those protocols are for any carriers. Using pigeons is just a lazy default, I know. My head is hanging in shame.
It appears the pigeon-Internet protocol of RFC 1149 http://bit.ly/aWPBP was updated in 1999 to provide QoS http://bit.ly/wR6Wa
I really do definitely thoroughly and definitely want a new set of patterns. Sigh.
Emerges. With some difficulty.
I am going to re-attempt sleep. This will be interesting. Or not. [exit]
@SnarkyPlatypus: “A 8-ball of speed with a flask of Xantini?” Well, it’s a start I suppose… [shuffles feet]
I think I would like to purchase a new set of sleep patterns.
@SnarkyPlatypus That is rather a disturbing tweet. http://bit.ly/1jCrIo I do not wish to know how it works.
@NewtonMark If the ABC had any balls, the Twitter back channel would be scrolling across the screen live. #qanda
Six million women have doubled the size of their lashes. Well, that’s good then.
Denim is evil, apparently. http://bit.ly/tlwu
@SnarkyPlatypus “Pynehorne” is a very special word. I’ve just been thinking about it. Thinking about it a lot.
@SnarkyPlatypus Any sentence that contains both “rohypnol” and “goat” is a wonder. Just one more word would make it perfect. Guess which?
@SnarkyPlatypus What if the goat is asleep? Or otherwise, um, incapacitated?
@SnarkyPlatypus I have many skills which should impress you. May I demonstrate a brief representative selection?
Do you want a Beatles song sung by a Hungarian ventriloquist choir? Sure you do. http://bit.ly/1Hkb7J
I’m glad that you can rent a goat in Seattle. http://bit.ly/3GN2TM
I am now going off-grid for a bit to make up for the lack of sleep earlier.
I see Mr James Packer is starting to look like his illustrious father, even if not as clueful. http://bit.ly/2rI4uU
@glengyron Am I post-modern? Really?
I cannot type “shoes”. I am made of fail.
@glengyron My entire perception of everything is broken. It is ALL beyond repair. But maybeI can still con a few people.
@smperris @SnarkyPlatypus All platypuses look the same.
He was wearing red basketball shows (Converse) and hair tied back, does that cancel out the bandana? I don’t know these things.
So what does a black bandana in the rear right jeans pocket mean again?
Also, Byteside Tech #4 on the dirty world of Internet Security is now online. It contains me, and others. http://bit.ly/1PvOBc
I have no choice over what I listen to. I am a puppet of… of everything. I am absorbing the Messages.
“Call 13 24 10… What do you think people say behind your back?”
Why does everyone on commercial radio shout all the time?
Commercial Radio Learnings: Australian households spend more on gambling than gas and electricity, and something about 4kg of cocaine.
The traffic reporter sounds disappointed that there’s been no crashes to disrupt traffic on Sydney’s roads. She must die.
Nova 96.9 FM advertises Best & Less at Centro Seven Hills. There’s the future of broadcast media, right there.
@kcarruthers I like custard. I haven’t had warm custard for ages. Will you make custard for me? Privately?
RT @stephenconroy: RT @davidlmorris Promoting your own Windows 3.1 launch party http://bit.ly/yUK9k
Holocaust and incest jokes not a good “fit” with the “Windows brand”. Go, Family Guy! http://bit.ly/swuvs
Sorry, why do I have to pretend to be a baby cow? I don’t understand commercial radio. Also, “Moo!”
@Headwellred Being “cool” and “funny” doesn’t pay the bills, Hon! Snake oil is a sensible retirement plan. Compared with the other one.
“Twitter will molest you.” http://bit.ly/2eBQUh Indeed.
RT @grantshow: http://twitpic.com/ncqx1 - It’s coming…. [And there are no screaming babies. Yet.]
@stephenconroy It’s OK. @Colvinus can be Voice of Reason at Media140. I will just absorb and reflect the Zeitgeist. A whole bucket of it.
Drinking an entire bottle of snake oil, in preparation for Media140. It goes down s m o o t h !
Mobile: Enmore Rd; lunch; King St errands?; then back to a desk of writing, somewhere.
@BernardKeane It appears that the Crikey website is several kinds of broken all at once, which does not bode well.
Dear cPanel, why is your “empty directory” button, which DELETES email without recourse, coloured GREEN?
@grantshow As the oldest of 7, you’ve already had your chance to take revenge. ;)
RT @grantshow: crying babies—nay, children—should not be allowed on public transport. [Oh FFS harden up! “Public” includes “everybody”! ;)]
@erkpod Some people NEED a lot more self-education than you. ;)
@erkpod Conferences work well for people who need their self-education to be in structured, concentrated bursts, I think.
@erkpod People pay for all sorts of rubbish if it’s packaged and marketed well. Need I list examples?
RT @Colgo: How old is this woman? http://bit.ly/1o0rqg A look at how far digital retouching can go #thepunch [Nice work, guys.]
Still a few slots left for Media140 Sydney next week. http://bit.ly/D6u46 Code “sydney140” gets you 20% off.
@misswired If you have photos of me on Flickr, by all mean tag them. I’m quite happy with that.
@artsdigitalera I’ve asked to be kept informed, anyway. :) Intriguing process, anyway, so I’d perhaps write about it if not a player.