Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

December 8th, 2010

I am now finished with Tuesday. You can have what’s left. Or feed it to the dog. [Gone.]

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@SnarkyPlatypus I can’t afford an Earthquake at Intercontinental prices!

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Catching up on the news while waiting for the sleeping pill to kick in. “I’ll fix you, sleep patterns!”

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@sandrabrew I’d never linked a hotel’s choice of hairdryer with business success before. I shall have to consider this more closely.

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@TaniaPV Alas I couldn’t stay with the people talking about the late-night visit. The street was too empty for me to follow them so closely.

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OH: “Of course I brought my own hair dryer! You just can’t rely on a hotel, they have such bad hair dryers.”

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OH, young woman in power dress: “Midnight last night there was a knock on my hotel room door, and it was like a senior vice president.”

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I depart, leaving maybe 4000 people who look to be settling in for a long night.

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So Will.I.am is DJing now. Who’s MCing? Can’t quite see. I should be gone. But that guy there, has he been at the pills?

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Now Eurhythmics, lyrics mod to “Sweet Dreamforce made of this”… It is the End Time.

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OK, so not a techno DJ. He’s now sussed the crowd. Guns’n’Roses. Sweet child o mine. 3000 people in the call and response.

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I wonder if the Salesforce.com branding guidelines cover the MC shouting “I play motherfucking technology”. # df10

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I think I used the word “admonish” incorrectly.

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Ah now the techno DJ begins…

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@greggtilston Hah! I’m currently lurking line neat Wipro’s private stand, near door A.

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Stevie wraps by admonishing the Tea Party.”Don’t you go listening to none of that foolishness… God bless America.”

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Will.I.am can’t sing for shit.

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Will.I.am is on stage with Stevie Wonder, current song is “Heard it on the grapevine” then a best-of medley.

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So it’s yeasty focaccia about an inch thick, cheese, capsicum, tomato paste, bacon, chicken and sweet chilli sauce. Awful. @ApostrophePong

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I’m about to try something called “Thai chicken focaccia pizza”. Ping @ApostrophePong

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OH, in bathroom queue: “But we’re, like, men! We can pee anywhere!” # df10

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The bouncers look both pleased that they don’t have to hit anyone and frustrated because they want to.

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A random woman from the audience is on stage singing with Mr Wonder. She is really bad. This is now the world’s most expensive karaoke nite.

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Mr Stevie Wonder, for once in his life http://post.ly/1J0SM

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I suspect it is better for all concerned that I haven’t been tagging these tweets

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Of these 10,000 people, a fair proportion seem to have taken ample advantage of the free bar.

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@rycrozier No techno, but funk and disco before. No lasers either. Yet. We can but hope.

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“We can work it out”, sings Mr Wonder. Behind me Suzette, all bleach and botox and customer service, dances. Badly. Heels, y’see.

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Easily 10,000 people in the room now. Mr Stevie Wonder has opened his set. Which means he’s supporting Will.I.am. Which is wrong.

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OH: “Well I did throw up over one of the other ones. Thankfully. Anyway we can get some more over there.” It is 8.50pm.

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It’s just like the IT department Christmas party, except on even worse drugs. No pills, just mini-burgers.

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It’s just Luke a warehouse party. Except it’s in a conference centre. And the cool people have been replaced by corporate nerds.

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Martini consumed, on to the concert venue. Maybe 6000 people in the room so far. Disco plays.

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OK, I’ve found the right bar. It seems I should have brought my laptop, ‘cos there’s a table with blue internet string and giant egg timer.

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I never did sort out the data SIM for my phone. So I will tweet, but seeing you will depend on the Wi-Fi working. Yeah right.

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Evening plan: W Hotel for meet-up with Salesforce.com EVP now, then “Global Gala” with Stevie Wonder and Will.I.am. Gawd.

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It is important to be careful when asking for directions. http://arseh.at/2jq

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My last tweet may have been wrong. I think the timings on the Salesforce.com Live website don’t match what’s actually happening.

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Today’s Mark Benioff Salesforce.com Dreamforce keynote will be rebroadcast in under 15 minutes at http://www.salesforce.co…

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Sneezing. Uhoh.

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MasterCard cuts off WikiLeaks for “illegal activity”. I’m glad they’ve decided they’re a court now. http://arseh.at/2jl

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Amused at various idiot media saying Assange is on “Interpol’s Most Wanted list” when there’s no such thing.

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@almiraanthony I’m back in Sydney on Tuesday 14 December.

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@jasonlangenauer These Americans are indeed polite people. But so much wine went to waste! Sad. So sad.

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This wine was an acceptable Californian sauvignon blanc, @R_Chirgwin, and while no cheese at lunch there was plenty at breakfast, @smperris

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Back at the hotel room to recharge batteries, plan some interviews and prepare for the rest of the day.

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Why is noone drinking the wine?

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VIP lunch with Mark Benioff, a mere 400 people. A curious ritual of supplication, even from a Japanese MP.”Mark, you’re great.”

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Amused that there’s 3 media people from ANZ, and we.have 2 PR minders. So pwned.

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Also Appforce and Siteforce in the pipeline. Presumably more details tomorrow. http://arseh.at/2ji

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Database.com will be available early 2011, free for first 100,000 records / 50,000 transactions. http://arseh.at/2jh

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So tonight’s concert has will.i.am as well as Stevie Wonder. I guess that means we have to hear that goddam song yet again. Kill me.

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Amusingly, @anthonybaxter, Steve Fisher is currently emphasising that database.com is “internet scale”. Life imitates art.

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A two-hour keynote with multiple presenters? More to go? We must be getting to the punchline soon.

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I’ve been quiet because I’m absorbed in the emotive nature of the presentations. They’ve all A Big Picture to sell. And they Believe.

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@StefanRied I’d be interested in catching up for a brief conversation for my Australian podcast. I’ll chase you this afternoon.

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Twitter’s role here is fascinating. Dozens of people dutifully repeating the Benioff sound bites into the Twitterverse.

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This is a distinctly preacher-like delivery. “Evangelism” is certainly the word. And Benioff looks vaguely like John Travolta.

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“We’re cloud computing drivers, we’re cataysts, evangelists… we’re here.. to create a new world!”

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Black Eyed Peas’ will.i.am is in the VIP section, introduced with applause.

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Theme song as Mark Beniof walks out on the vast stage Black Eyed Peas’ “Own It”. “This is the Cloud Nation”, he says.

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There’s something like 14,000 people in this room. Music kicks off with the obligatory Video of Animated Words and Big Numbers.

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Wandering from the hotel to the Moscone Centre, next door, for a quick breakfast in the media room then Marc Benioff’s keynote.

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Wed (Tue) plan: Salesforce.com’s Dreamforce in SFO all day, then their gala event with Stevie Wonder (!) tonight.

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Aha @anthonybaxter, well obviously /dev/null is webscale. Don’t you know anything? http://is.gd/iltkK

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@anthonybaxter Hah! What does “web-scale” even mean? Have I missed some public arsehattery?

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To be announced in next couple hours: Salesforce.com’s Database.com database in the cloud service http://arseh.at/2jg

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I’d be a happy man if the Australian folks at Dreamforce would get in contact with me at some point. I’ll post my plans a bit later.

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@oberonsghost Hello. You’re up late. Or I’m up early. Or something.

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Errrrrrrrrrrrrr.

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