Does this stupid thing never end? instagr.am/p/OoMHHGCFkJ/
Yeah whatever it’s just there and we’re sick of it instagr.am/p/OoKBBzCFjn/
@MrFlungabunga Calling Dr Freud…
Not quite as much sense instagr.am/p/On_Y96CFgo/
Finally, some sense instagr.am/p/On_Sh0iFgi/
Sorry, but how am I expected to report accurately when @bengrubb does that to distract me? #samsungexperiencestore
In fact you can buy a phone outright or sign with any of the big three telcos in-store. #SamsungExperienceStore
I’ve just deleted a incorrect tweet about not being able to buy a smartphone at #SamsungExperienceStore … McGee confused both me and PR.
Metaphor instagr.am/p/On7t3viFvf/
I may have another correction shortly… stand by… #samsungexperiencestore
Sorry I just deleted and corrected a tweet
Samsung Galaxy Tab II 10.1 available from #SamsungExperienceStore from 0800 tomorrow. WI-Fi only. 3G later.
Samsung’s Tyler McGee battles the #SamsungExperienceStore hashtag fail instagr.am/p/On1WMpiFt5/
Clearly imposters instagr.am/p/OnzestCFtd/
Latest Korean entertainment technology instagr.am/p/OnzXEgiFtX/
Choices instagr.am/p/OnyCEpiFtE/
I must say, these new Samsung droids seem a bit unwieldy instagr.am/p/OnxapBiFs6/
I AM GOING TO CASE OUT THIS SAMSUNG EXPERIENCE STORE NOW. OK EVERYBODY LIE DOWN ON THE FLOOR AND KEEP CALM.
@SnarkyPlatypus Good to see you applying The Hearst Principle.
@quadrapop International style. But the requirement is Sydney CBD, and in the next 20 minutes.
@GlennBroadhurst Sorry, just dashing on errands now and don’t want to get it wrong.
@GlennBroadhurst So, you can just download the Bill from aph.gov.au …
@riskybusiness Bearing in mind I haven’t had a chance to read last night’s amendments. So let’s walk hack Queensland web servers!
@riskybusiness Correct. Retention order can be issued without a warrant, warrant required to get access to retained metadata…
@en_gy See, the fact that you even have them is more or less like the bells that lepers used to carry.
Alien blob creature attacks pointless monorail instagr.am/p/OnqB1qiFqt/
Holding back the Domino Effect, you’re our only hope instagr.am/p/Onm-BJiFpg/
Communist Re-Education Centre instagr.am/p/Onmi2siFpT/
More Communism instagr.am/p/OnmUksCFpL/
@en_gy Have you washed? I’ve seen what you eat.
Communism instagr.am/p/OnlMWnCFom/
@en_gy Yes, you can press your little nose to the window and gaze at THOSE OF US WHO ARE INVITED.
Mobile: Errands down the length of the Sydney CBD until I eventually find myself at the Samsung Experience Store at 1700 AEST or so.
“The server at [REDACTED] is taking too long to respond.” YES I KNOW THAT YOU STUPID WEB BROWSER.
Trying not to be a bad influence.
ACCAN_AU Keen to see @stilgherrian and others discuss online privacy and security? Register for #ACCAN12 National Conference bit.ly/L9Dz0K
@SBSNews “Federalment” is as awesome word and should be used more often. Thank you.
So yeah I will indeed be going to Microsoft’s Tech.Ed 2012 on the Gold Coast, 11 to 14 Sept. australia.msteched.com
Thanks, @R_Chirgwin, and they’re in stock at Target’s online store with… Australia Post parcel from MEL the ONLY delivery option. Fail.
Dear Buyers of Cheap Footwear, is there anywhere in the Sydney CBD that is KNOWN to have Dunlop Volleys in black in stock?
Serrels Sometimes I wish I liked Nickelback. Just so I could say ‘I like Nickelback’. That would be so sweet.
No, email spam filter, I am actually discussing brand-name pharmaceuticals with my doctor by email.
@FallenAngel_Deb Well indeed but the person who called me bourgeois reckons it is all happening to me and… well I’m speechless!
I’ve just been called bourgeois.
oberonsghost RT: @juhasaarinen: @stilgherrian @oberonsghost There is time for thinking, and time for [pump] action.
@ozdj My pleasure. The main problems with conference Wi-Fi are caused by radio interference, overloading the WAP(s) and people being twats.
@SnarkyPlatypus @jeamland What is “Email”? Don’t they make refrigerators?
@trib “Join the Australian Army, become to sort of lad your mum would be proud of.”
@sparksman Quiet carriages explained, though on-train announcements are patchy. cityrail.info/news/2012/1205…
@dead_aeroplane Well I wasn’t the one who ran amok (literally!) in Strathfield Plaza with a Chinese AK-47 knock-off. This time.
RT @rashasman @stilgherrian are you in a Patrick White novel? [Oh FFS I hope not. Quick, turn the page and check.]
@ozdj Step 4: Block access to protocols like BitTorrent, name and shame miscreants. That’s probably enough steps.
@ozdj Step 3: WAPs on different frequencies, SSIDs. Split punters across WAPs by giving them login info. Monitor performance.
@ozdj Step 2: read the specs of the access points to ensure you have enough for all participants.
@ozdj Step one: traffic analysis based on real-world stats from similar successfully-provisioned events.
A young man helps everyone with luggage off the train. He’s tall, tanned, fit, confident but relaxed. He turns. His t-shirt reads “Army”.
I arrive instagr.am/p/OnRZV_iFre/
R_Chirgwin For an industry that constantly trumpts its “no-borders” telecommuting status, it’s amazing how many people stipulate where devs must be…
@MartinCuddihy Yeah I guess after @mpesce yesterday that @amworldtodaypm is emotionally exhausted.
The future. Your future. Because those drunk teenagers you saw will get to vote and you’ll be senile. instagr.am/p/OnQKTJCFqi/
Cosmopolitan Strathfield, home of the famous assault rifle massacre instagr.am/p/OnP3O_iFqW/
@mrgrumpystephen Wow! That’s all the food you need and it only takes you 11 minutes a week!
“NO! No, goddamn it, no biscuits! That pink stuff in the Monte Carlos is SOCIALISM.” abc.net.au/unleashed/2800…
RT @oberonsghost: I found my peppermints! [Urgent! Please retweet!]
jendudley If Avril Lavigne and that Nickelback dude start making duets, I will apply to NASA to resign from Earth. bit.ly/NFUuuT
@MartinCuddihy @amworldtodaypm So, she just repeats “It’s fucked, it’s fucked, it’s fucked” over and over until the segment ends?
Moria instagr.am/p/OnNhRzCFov/
“I saw a great situation recently, that was apparently true…” Um, so you DIDN’T see it. You just can’t trust autistic swans.
TumblrTXT [here’s someone who identifies as an autistic swan getting mad about people saying ‘kawaii’ on tumblr -ed] swanblood.tumblr.com/post/291842039…
@en_gy Yes. One digit per toe. And?
@jendudley @djsflynn I’m fairly fond of “the entire operation is run by a white-haired, bow-tied kook who seems perennially drunk”.
“The Differences Between ‘The Newsroom’ And An Actual Newsroom” thoughtcatalog.com/2012/the-diffe… HT @jendudley
Pollytics RT @zombiemao: on the Turnbull shares: A spokesman for NBN Co said ”pas de commentaire”. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Crossed the Nepean instagr.am/p/OnLElHiFmu/
Crossing the Nepean, almost instagr.am/p/OnK_mNCFmm/
I thought I told you about standing too close instagr.am/p/OnK1xQCFmZ/
Validating packages.
@lewellyn So, it’s an alpha with few users, and I’ve logged in for a whole minute. YES OF COURSE I HAVE A VALID OPINION FOR YOU.
@jamescmcpherson Mere mortals can plonk down their $50 like anyone else. join.app.net or via (HT @damonism) ihave50dollars.com
@en_gy One should always remember that 525 lines is more than enough. NTSC ROCKS!
@Colvinius Because they’re paid six-figure salaries to be innovative.
I have just logged in to the new alpha thing like Twitter that is not Twitter. Ping @jeamland @SnarkyPlatypus
Downloading the Flip4Mac 3.0 Beta so I can, with luck, listen to the Australian Parliament’s audio stream in some weird proprietary format.
OH: “So it’s Parramatta rail yard, right? Well don’t bring that lunatic Tony with you. And you’ve got plenty of grog?”
So, now there’s an old bloke with a gravelly voice shouting into his phone, also not understanding “quiet carriage”. He’s… fascinating.
@madradish Ah, thank you, but that was an expression of not having decided yet, as opposed to not knowing how.
SnarkyPlatypus If Abbott is “entirely a modern man” (what does that even mean?), then I guess most of the rest of us are post-Singularity.
michaelneale I like how the caltrain designers decided that aerodynamics was a communist plot, because bugger science.
@juhasaarinen @oberonsghost Thank you. Great minds think alike, right?
So @Oatmeal has raised the $850l needed to build a Nikola Tesla Museum. Bravo. indiegogo.com/teslamuseum
@6564828 @BernardK @nehadk Heh. Thank you all. There’ll be my usual level of commentary en route, except probably from Consilium.
Explaining the “quiet carriage” concept to someone who’s not good with “quiet”. Being abused in a nasal, gravelly accent.
@dannolan “Bike bus”? I thought you said it’s too early to be huffing the toilet cleaner?
Explaining financial fraud to a taxi driver. Next up, teaching fish to swim.
En route to San Francisco, via Wentworth Falls, Sydney, Sunshine Coast, Brisbane, Sydney, Los Angeles. instagr.am/p/OnBogLiFgV/
Departure, with random flower of unknown origin instagr.am/p/OnBGkuCFgJ/
Mobile: Outside to await taxi to Wentworth Falls; 1032 train to Sydney Central; somehow to The Rocks.
T minus 10 minutes and counting.
@mukimu It appears that @spandaslui needs to read this tweet. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
T minus 30 minutes and counting.
@R_Chirgwin Sure. By Friday this is going to be just adorable.
T minus 40 minutes and counting.
In the cleaning supplies storeroom, huffing all the things.
@R_Chirgwin Am I correct in assuming that “all-purpose bleach (including urgent huffing)” is verboten in septic systems?
@R_Chirgwin On the bright side, you’re all good for empty window cleaner bottles with no window cleaner in them.
@R_Chirgwin You are completely out of toilet cleaner. On your own head be it. Oh. Ewww.
RT: Pro Tip: How to throw away all the things: 1. Throw away things. 2. Repeat step 1 until there are no more things.
RT @dannolan: @stilgherrian man it is too early in the day to huff it [Yeah, but I didn’t want to start on the butane cartridges.]
Look, I know I’m a man and we’re not mean to say this sort of thing, but where’s the toilet cleaner?
Dear America, I am in SFO with times free from Thu 30 Aug to Mon 3 Sep, should you want to be almost-famous in Australia.
T minus 60 minutes and counting.
Art restoration: Don’t try it at home, kids! gawker.com/5936665
@russellwld @en_gy *blinks*
@HarrisonPolites Oh, we’re talking at crossed purposes. I’m talking about copyright infringement != theft (and I refuse to call it piracy).
@Andrew_Zammit This is the relevant tweet. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
Oh. Yeah. Accusing a senior police officer of theft. That sounds like a Strategy for Success!
@CassPF You’re lucky. At AuscERT 2012 Det Supt Brian Hay of Qld Police STOLE MY BREAKFAST SAUSAGES RIGHT OFF MY PLATE!
nickpmclaren The Greens are now referring to the Shooters Party/ Christian Democrats alliance in NSW as Guns n’ Moses #nswpol
@SnarkyPlatypus Are these the new Sugar Grunts?
@GreenJ I had a dream where a man called Len Pickle said he didn’t need evidence to accuse someone of a crime, or something. Really weird.
“Amazon Glacier”, @ozdj? As if uploading data to the cloud wasn’t already slow enough…
ozdj ~USD10/mth for a terabye = bargain! RT @seamus New Amazon Glacier service. Archival cloud storage for 1c /GB per month. aws.typepad.com/aws/2012/08/am…
@DavidFeng Ah yes, my little friend the feral goldfish. All hail Eris! Vive les poissons rouges sauvages!
@HarrisonPolites Your anecdote conflicts with the words that have come out of judge’s mouths in US and Australian courtrooms. ;)
RT @SnarkyPlatypus: If you view “The Australian” as a fanfic publication, it suddenly all makes sense.
@HarrisonPolites Except copyright infringement is NOT theft by any reasonable legal definition, ‘cos “deprive of use” isn’t met.
BernardKeane Oops. I hope Kim WIlliams didn’t recycle the example of Shakespeare and copyright from someone else without attribution. Oh, wait…
@middleclassgirl It’s interesting that the Samsung store is at 450 George St, just across the road and down a bit from Apple’s. No rivalry.
@DavidFeng Thank you. Changing my avatar is like changing my underwear. I do it every few days to create an impression.
@DavidFeng AFAIK this is not a Cheezburger original, but here’s the full image. cheezburger.com/6417292288
@DavidFeng And #CaoNiMa to you to. Oh wait. Heh, I see the resemblance, but it’s a baby goat. There’s a story, if I can find it…
mikecreighton People that put “FINAL” in their filenames should be shot.
MT @NewtonMark: @anthonybaxter introduced me to “fractally wrong”, where the closer you look at something the wronger it gets.
Wed plan: Pack; 1032 train to Sydney; check in; work on Consilium presentation; haircut; 1700 Samsung Experience Store opening; TGIW.
Since face recognition is the outrage du jour, I’ll just point to this thing I wrote a year ago. cso.com.au/article/398581…
@SnarkyPlatypus Je vous souhaite bonne chance dans votre travail, et nous nous réjouissons de vous voir à l’avenir lumineux et brillant.
@lewellyn I’m doing the rough map of my SFO appointments over the next 48 hours, so we’ll lock in one of those dates. I’m staying downtown.
RT @mindykoch: I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
RT @mikko: BitCoin Credit Card. That’s ·exactly· what I need. codinginmysleep.com/6-8-weeks-unti…
@SnarkyPlatypus “Fifteen trips”? If only.
@SnarkyPlatypus Je suis éveillé et alerte et prêt à être mon quinzaine de voyages. Bientôt, je vais enfiler un pantalon! Et vous?
@lewellyn Indeed, this is my 4th visit to SFO, from memory. Looking forward to it. But I have simple tastes in entertainment.
RT @sylmobile: Humans have become document routers. Can’t you see what has happened to us?
Ah my status has been recognised. And I haven’t even put on pants yet.
@lewellyn BTW I’m now confirmed in SFO from the end of #vmworld [your ugly US notation] Thu 8/30 to Mon 9/3. There’s a Full Moon in there.
@lewellyn Depends on your “work” I suppose. But the whole point of lorem ipsum is that people CAN’T read it and just see the layout.
@oberonsghost I’m tempted to keep clicking just to see exactly how many puerile euphemisms for penis and vagina they have.
Gosh. I just booked my remaining SFO nights via Hotels.com and the UX is excellent. I’ll write more about that later.
Um, you know that apart from its politico-media meaning it’s also a euphemism for masturbation, don’t you?
Plan for the next fortnight: Today to SYD; tomorrow to MCY for Consilium; Sunday to SFO for #vmworld and more; Wed 5 Sep to SYD for ACCAN.
So, there’s a 50 Shades Lorem Ipsum generator. That’ll help. fiftyshadesgenerator.com HT @oberonsghost
@MollyMcIsaac I know. I am with you there. I find that Twitter does the job. And then someone will insult me.
RT @MollyMcIsaac: Writing a ranty blog entry about this, standby. [Yeah that’ll fix it. Always does.] [ducks]
@expectproblems Chang yet!
@expectproblems And besides, I won’t be in America for another four and a half days, so I hope you will leave it in a serviceable condition.
@expectproblems You are in America so I do not trust a word you say because you are an NSA simulacrum of the real @expectproblems.
Ouch. Be the goat. Be the goat. Be the goat. [deep breath]
I BELIEVE THAT IT IS NOW WEDNESDAY MORNING SO I WILL DO THE WEDNESDAY MORNING THINGS OK I WILL START DOING THEM NOW.