@SnarkyPlatypus Deep question, this. I have no answer.
I have been very well behaved this evening.
So @jturner_ibrs has gone feral on the mic.
@ruth_parslow @dobes To stop Marr from talking? I don’t know there’s enough ammunition in Christendom for that.
@mpesce And after the ratings, the cold cuts.
@dobes Look, I can put every round into the body of a man-sized target at this range.
I’ve got a clear shot at David Marr from up here.
Arriving slightly late for @ethics_centre’s debate “Only The Wicked Need Fear Government Spying” http://t.co/3e5F7d6maJ
@KenAnalytics @BundyB Tetrahedra are the way to go.
Ambling towards the financial district.
SydneyTom_ RT @divinewrite: Oops pic.twitter.com/V3jcoY6Z4Q
(Is $16.99 a kilo good or bad?
I’m not sure…)
@BundyB I am irregular. I should take the tablets.
I would like to take everyone who thinks that restaurant websites should have the menu as a PDF file and grind them into a smooth paste.
5at5 number 166: White supremacy, Chinese smog, more meth, more swearing, and the Vietnam War. http://t.co/L8kGE4mS3G
@vealmince You would think that, yes. Particularly after last year’s little adventures in data disclosure.
@vealmince Yeah that would also do it. My dark, dark sense of humour is the only way I can cope with even knowing about those places.
@vealmince Yes, they do. Poor possums confuse concentration camps with death camps, but I can understand why. The latter get all the press.
@wolfcat I am the supposition of all wisdom.
@wolfcat I suspect that’s true, but I have no facts to back it up, so I didn’t mention it. Call me old-fashioned.
@vealmince I did leave out my original opener, “When they’re not shipping children to third-world concentration camps, they send email.”
@vealmince Was I being too nice to the majestic Department of Immigration and Border Protection, do you think?
Me at @zdnetaustralia: “Immigration’s G20 email bungle was only the first fail†http://t.co/EYP5R12501 Contains traces of @Steve_Lockstep
Shaun.
@christopherneal Not when it comes to goats. No wait.
@teek_eh It may be closer than you think.
@mcbridesride Not yet, alas. “Coupla days, mate.”
Sitting on a bench on said platform is an old Chinese guy doing amyl. Bit early in the day, I’d have thought.
Arriving at Sydney Central station on platform 1 for some reason.
“Happiness Guarantee. If you’re not happy let us know, we’ll make it right.”
@dobes Oh yes, I am familiar with goat rental services. Quite familiar.
Column filed for @zdnetaustralia. It contains a “WTF?”
Crossing the Nepean instagram.com/p/04HnXeCFrX/
Writing. Shoosh.
@jon_lawrence No, I’m good,thanks.
RT @taosecurity: “@kcshowler: #Anonymous threatens #Israel with ‘electronic holocaust’ #cyberattack http://t.co/GsPH5skZtoâ… < I’ll take Uni…
I think that once I’m on the train I’ll stop laughing long enough to actually get the writing done.
@nehadk @darovda Oops. I misread it as just “walk outâ€, not walk out without paying. Retweet deleted.
“Taser fired by federal agents kills driver as car is engulfed in flamesâ€, writes @JessicaGlenza http://t.co/7HM3buevcI
RT @GuardianAus: Jamie Oliver launches global petition in Sydney trib.al/sMOpvzI [DIBP fails yet again.]
RT @smurray38: @johnb78 @stilgherrian The notice itself is the (1A) requirement; the grounds are the (1)(b) requirement [Oh, details.]
All the sections.
johnb78 The AEC is excellent* at making its sub-100-word press releases internally consistent. v/@stilgherrian pic.twitter.com/W3DMX8g3aw
RT @runasand: Philadelphia officers dangled drug dealer from 18th story balcony to get him to divulge the password to his computer: http://…
“Notice of intention to deregister the Australian Democrats - s.137(1A) of the Commonwealth Electoral Act 1918†http://t.co/MtIIcXqcj2
RT @melissacbrooks: Meanwhile the AEC has issued a notice that it is considering deregistering the Democrats. http://t.co/asbRKQBnlT
@skwashd It’s true. It’s this kind of personal “service†that Uber can never hope to replicate.
Me, on phone: “A cab at 1pm please.” Operator: “Oh, we’ll all be dead by then. I’ve just been reading about global warming.”
Tue plan, redraft: Write for @zdnetaustralia; 1324 train to Sydney; haircut; errands; 1845 @ethics_centre IQ2 debate http://t.co/3e5F7d6maJ
Oh God.
@dobes Who can tell?
Worst peer pressure ever, @dobes. pic.twitter.com/ebIr6ID4yS
Persuading a leech to leave the living room and, indeed, this life. Extensively unimpressed with Nature.
Broadly speaking, @purserj @NicholasFryer, this photograph explains everything. pic.twitter.com/4Gt6qzukHI
@NicholasFryer @purserj You’d need to use a scoop.
RT @purserj: So, what’s the difference between Periscope, Meerkat and Livestream or Ustream? [The amount of unicorn glitter up their arse.]
@ethics_centre I was amused to see early publicity listing Dreyfus and Marr as FOR the proposal. That’d be a fun challenge.
@ozjimbob “WHY?†you ask? Because fuckwits.
“Take our GST quiz: You’ll ‘never, ever’ get 100 per centâ€, alleges @abcnews http://t.co/hSXjIECGLt [I got 40% and hate life.]
willdropphoto “It’s never your successful friends posting the inspirational quotes.” - Some dude from @reddit pic.twitter.com/VvxieFG5Qg
Fuckinâ€@j_hutchch and his goddam “factsâ€.
RT @j_hutch: “Apps that don’t crack the top 100 during their debut run almost never turn out to be viable.” I’d like to see some actual dat…
“Meerkat is dying — and it’s taking U.S. tech journalism with it†http://t.co/jhp5Zs8wOM [If it were ever alive…]
Laughing at reports on Periscope and Meerkat which seem oblivious to the existence for years of Ustream, Livestream and all the others.
Tue plan, draft: Deal with SEKRIT task list; 1324 train to Sydney; haircut; errands; 1845 @ethics_centre IQ2 debate http://t.co/3e5F7d6maJ
Warren Truss could sing the national anthem before each flight is allowed to take off.
The safety of Australian airline passengers will be assured by requiring at least one Warren Truss in the cockpit at all times.
“NSA weighed ending phone program before Snowden leakâ€, reports @AP http://t.co/TmHGpW9q2i
DevAdvocat Uh huh…. pic.twitter.com/2fL34zdhSp
Waiting for the nausea to subside.
blakehounshell Saudi plan for Yemen:
1. Bomb a bunch of stuff
2. ???
3. Stability
“A Struggle to Save the Scaly Pangolin†http://t.co/Zx2IlKfchg
DJBentley Pennsylvania is too big.
Laggard.
Spud.
Isn’t Spud Laggard the federal Labor leader?
“Spud laggard.”
RT @Tim_Beshara: Whoever coined the phrase “spud laggard” needs a good talking too. [They deserve a raise and an Easter bonus.]
RT @Tim_Beshara: The Abbott Govt is really going after the big issues in the Harper Review. https://t.co/8yalBEiHPy http://t.co/EvftHtMyR2
dwr “Bitcoin is anonymous!”*
*Except when it isn’t! Law enforcement using blockchain to catch corrupt DEA agent. pic.twitter.com/0ZWTjwxVk7
Dedicated to @sylmobile https://t.co/TdgGABK29X
_youhadonejob Anything is a nose trimmer if you’re brave enough. pic.twitter.com/0rq0DpQFLL
Tuesday. All day. Tuesday.
Gorn.
I see that it’s approaching self-harm hour on ABC TV. Well, some of of us have lives,
Being a hopeless @sarix1 fanboy and an embarrassment to everyone.
@NewtonMark @sarix1 That “de-escalation†work was awesome. It’s why he, once a problem, is now the solution.
@NewtonMark @sarix1 What that arsehat Mark just said. No pressure.
@sarix1 @NewtonMark I know that you know how important that interview was. We can’t let that disappear into the river,
@NewtonMark Exactly. I know that @sarix1 will be embarrassed by my fanboyness now, but fuck it. Yes. This is what it is about. [Bows.]
@NewtonMark Hasn’t @sarix1 been just… brilliant.
RT @NewtonMark: Also: Listen to the last two weeks of @sarix1’s Background Briefing. [Yes. Do this.]
@DrParnassus I understand your point, but will make a linguistic argument in due course.
Seriously, @bernyoung, this is why we can’t have nice things.
bernyoung “It’s not a comeback” at least it didn’t start that way @Grant_Hackett tells @tomforbesGC On Brekkie tomorrow pic.twitter.com/zMVEvLt3hW
@elronxenu Yeah. Isn’t it appalling. I shall return to this point.
@Kimota Well indeed. We all just “write stuffâ€.
RT @semibogan: @stilgherrian @sarix1 you sir are a menace [Somebody finally wakes up.]
And all that said, Chris Bowen is still a useless cunt.
People ask me why I’m hesitant to call myself a journalist. I need only point to the work o@sarix1x1 to explain. I just write stuff.
Just fuckin’ read it. And then listen to the interview in question. http://t.co/JpWEzjcTZg This deserves another Walkley.
Read this, and revel in the fact that @sarix1 is one of Australia’s most outstanding journalists ever. http://t.co/SjaL69EfHy
@phbarratt Don’t remind me. Sigh.
I may have said some words on this The Wire story “Blockchains to the rescue?†http://t.co/8Kp210Nd4I
It’s one of those word puzzles, isn’t it. Change CHRIS BOWEN into LANDFILL, changing one letter at a time.
Imagine that. The first working day after losing the NSW election, and who does federal Labor put up for a chat on TV? Chris Bowen. FFS.
Chris Bowen, the answer to a question nobody asked.
I see that federal Labor’s strategy is to put another useless cunt on @abc730 to waffle meaninglessly. Well done.
Gorn.
Farting like a geriatric cow on an all-bean diet.
@NathanWinter75 @NikkyD77 Yes, but there the bookshelf would fall right to left.
@stewart_emily There’s a whole lot of stuff about building an emotional connection with people you only know as images on a screen.
@stewart_emily Depends what you mean by “genuine”. Search for the (arguably harsh) term “recreational grief”.
“In the Minister’s office, with a bookshelf.”
RT @0xAli @stilgherrian Thanks, now i am afraid of terrorists and bookshelves… [I am here to serve. Let me tell you about bathtubs…]
You’re probably more likely to die from bookshelves falling on you than terrorism.
RT @NewtonMark: Imagine if that bookshelf tipped over and fell on Brandis at his desk. Imagine. Just for a moment. #dataretention
RT @ben_hr: When David Icke is more sensible about data retention than actual govt policy you know we’ve ended up in a dark place http://t.…
You too can imagine your not part of the problem by retweeting every fragment of air crash related fact or rumour that you see.
Looks like the recreational voyeurs of other people’s misery have a new plane crash to obsess over. Extra lube to the rolling news studios!
RT @CyberPrefixerAU NT Cabinet cyberministers voice support for cybercrocodile safari hunting [CYBERCROCODILES! #cyber #cybercyber]
RT @belindafarrelly This has helped me better understand (and face) all the stupid this week ow.ly/i/a4mqv [So true.]
I want to know where Brandis scores his drugs, ‘cos usually it costs a fortune to be this stupid for this long. Or so I’m told.
Brandis sees a practical difference between a data store you own and a data store you can access any time you like just by asking? Arsehat.
No, @SenatorLudlam, it is not the least bit “remarkable” that Brandis doesn’t know things. It’s his key distinguishing feature.
Still, nice bookshelves, eh George? People must think you’re really bright. I mean, look at those shelves.
Thrilled∗ to be in a country that sets up comprehensive domestic surveillance because a buffoon of a minister doesn’t begin to understand.
RT @HughRundle: “Narrow and traditional.â€
George Brandis sums up his general approach to thinking about any matter.
GetUp in GetUp being useless shock.
Receiving advice on how to best manage my urination needs from a police officer. Long story.
Thanks to everyone else who also confirmed my belief about the (lack of) extra Anzac Day holiday. L
Essential’s amusingly misnamed poll, “Approval of Joe Hockey†http://t.co/jraArxmRJo
@phbarratt Oh, thanks, I wish I had the time to explore now. But alas I have to head for the train now. Noted.
RT @mjonesy_87: @stilgherrian yep, no extra holiday. [Thanks.]
Can someone confirm that there’s no additional public holiday in NSW, given that Anzac Day is on a Saturday this year?
Much pleuting en Haymarket instagram.com/p/0mran1iFuW/
Ah, this is good PR from @marshontap. “I’d like you to have the opportunity to throw bread rolls at my colleaguesâ@rycrozierr@jturner_ibrsr_ibrs
Time for gin and tonic two before the 2018 train. Because there’s nothing else to do.
RT @kcarruthers Sydney why are you so humid [It’s the weather.]
“Sharing economy apps need a fair and flexible framework of rules, Labor MP says” ab.co/1EDTMaa
Tub waan ped ped maak. I regret nothing.
“Hong Kong man who dismembered and cooked parents jailed for life” ab.co/19eS1ra
Phrases which are internally inconsistent #48: “Reality TV star”
Resorting to tub waan.
@SnarkyPlatypus He seems a bit needy.
I seem to have rather a lot of email from some bloke called Mike Baird.
Done. And now, to Thaitown.
So, half an hour now to document whatever the fuck I just did, and then figure out dinner plans before the trek westward.
Ah, good, I think I’ve got the fuckers.
MarkDiStef The most Australian TV cross you can do (pic via @dobes) pic.twitter.com/2ehd0mHRsA
Grrr.
EXHIBITING EXTRAORDINARY PATIENCE.
I suppose I just have to be patient, and watch the scan, and watch the passing Enmore traffic. It’s going to be a late one.
PATIENTLY WAITING FOR THE SCANS TO FINISH.
“Scanning for known malware files.â€
Right. Approval received. Time to flush out the infiltrators.
Waiting for a call back to authorise me to spend time and (their) money disinfecting this site.
@Steve_Lockstep @johnb78 @teek_eh Yes thank you. Sigh.
<meta name=”generator” content=”WordPress 3.0.3” /> Yeah I see what your problem is here. #headdesk
“We have received notification that abuse is originating from your service…†oh FFS that just makes the day perfect*.
@ruminski That’s not an “alsoâ€, that’s my entire point.
@kcarruthers @gusworldau Nobody needs a MOOC.
@kcarruthers @zerogeewhiz Well, I’ve departed the Oracle lunch. I shall forgot to pass on your comments in the fullness of time.
I had suspected that today’s plan seemed ambitious, and so it has come to pass.
So the marketing for the Anzac Experience events has begun. Sigh. pic.twitter.com/iHmR0uByi2
@zerogeewhiz @kcarruthers Oracle’s PR people consider your response “a bit harsh”.
@kcarruthers Well, moderately interesting.
“Irishmen”? Is Crusader Rabbit still living in the Great Depression? Language reflects the mind.
Il pleut en Sydney instagram.com/p/0mIkVSiFrO/
Very interesting information about Oracle in APAC being announced tomorrow.
So much pleasure from one fish.
Mulloway, etc. instagram.com/p/0mAcpOiFuP/
RT @jdub tfw you are impossibly wedged between authoritarians and civil liberties pic.twitter.com/xAR4EEOzbj [#rule34]
Oink.
@PlaneTalking @paulwallbank There’s plenty of pork-pulling at most of these lunchtime briefings.
@dobes No, no. I still have my pants on.
@dobes Ankles at webscale.
@kcarruthers It’s a glorious piece of spin, what?
Dear Oracle (and everyone), please think of an example other than Uber.
Oracle is pushing the idea of “engineered systems” rather than the “pieces of Lego” of tinkering with open source.
Here’s @paulwallbank’s picture of the pork cheek entrée.instagram.com/p/0l7ab1REKB/u
Australia’s skills shortage gets a mention.
Morris says that unless you do the analytics properly you’re not going to get any ROI for gathering all this data.
Morris doesn’t like the term “big data” because it’s not about the size but about predictive analytics, rather than retrospective.
Chris Morris IDG says increasing proportion of IT spend is from line manager level. They’ve got surveys, actually.
“Australia is teetering on the edge in terms of its focus”, says Oracle’s head bloke. Will we use technology to ensure our future?
Oh that’s right. Today’s discussion is about digital disruption”. Thank God there is wine.
The Oracle lunch is about to begin instagram.com/p/0l2G83CFqh/
Well here we are then instagram.com/p/0l0knGCFnZ/
What’s even funnier is that the linguitards and whinging about an event that happened two years ago. Do try to keep up. Arsehats.
My “‘Literally’ purists literally belong in the stone age”, August 2013 http://t.co/e94UxQKvc8
I guess I’ll have to repost my piece on “literally” again. Stand by.
Looks like @dobes is literally incandescent with rage.
@AtomicMPC Well they’re basically the same thing, under a sufficiently overwrought analogy.
Imagining Sydney Central station slowly filling with sarin, a decidedly pleasing image.
OH: “Oh we have lunch there every Tuesday. We drink champagne and complain about our husbands.”
The #purpletrain approaches Sydney Central station instagram.com/p/0lwQYsiFgS/