Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

May 2016

@paulwallbank You’re preaching to the choir, ma’am.

via TweetDeck in reply to paulwallbank

eohiggins Shocking. pic.twitter.com/xBbDSIy1AD

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 9:23 PM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

“Trust scores” are where some algorithm decides “You want to log in? Yeah, seems close enough. Whatever.” https://t.co/OdiiiNQyKq

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@shenmaxiu Yeah, but I haven’t been back in more than 10 years. I only have to be on a standard clinical dose of my meds now.

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@tacticalmaid Oh. I think I may have actually known that once.

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@shenmaxiu @tacticalmaid @btucker22 I’m originally from Adelaide, but WTF is Zone 3?

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Herring1967 I think that’s pretty much repressed gay pride day RT @Ponderinglif: I think BF and EDL keep arranging them but noone turns up.

via Echofon (retweeted on 9:07 PM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@RaincyK Thank you very much. I think.

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@shenmaxiu @tacticalmaid @btucker22 Oh dear God, I’d forgotten about that. Thanks. Thanks for nothing.

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@tacticalmaid Yeah but @btucker22 so missed a Spiders from Mars joke. https://t.co/ucHTkQZFlK

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btucker22 Giant space spiders above , otherwise known as huntsman, on the Mt Stromlo Sky Cam pic.twitter.com/GE7omY8dr2

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 8:49 PM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

So anyway, yes, star of TV and TV @markhumphries will be joining us this Saturday. https://t.co/cP2UULUdld

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Shoosh, @markhumphries, I haven’t announced that you’re on “The 9pm Edict Public House Forum 3” yet. IT’S A SEKRIT.

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I was planning to announce the whole panel tonight, but the rain seems to have delayed people’s email.

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So far I have one really good and one kinda average panellist confirmed. Book your audience spot now. https://t.co/cP2UULUdld

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@WeathermanABC Thanks for that, Graham. You’re bringing back ancient memories of high-school earth sciences.

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“I don’t seem to be enough for my husband any mor@guardiandpic.twitter.com/bANLxPQKyEQKyE

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TBH, the eyelines in this pic look more like it’s from a @guardian column about a failing middle-class marriage. https://t.co/BonZROEZdU

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And no, @kcarruthers, I’m not searching for “russian bear porn” because I’m pretty sure what I’ll find.

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JazzTwemlow Coral bleaching, like anal bleaching, is a sign that humanity has lost its way.

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 8:06 PM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@captaincaple The 9am local time thing has been there forever. Maybe @WeathermanABC knows the history?

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Beautiful-looking tarts ruined by cheap fat, eh? Tell me more, Vicar. https://t.co/tsHeWw2BNH

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@WeathermanABC Or possibly my alleged sense of humour needs recalibrating. It’s been a long day.

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@WeathermanABC Correct. (Also, your satire detector needs recalibrating.)

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See, people, this is how we all know that climate change is a fraud. https://t.co/wolAFbqY8U

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@GordyPls @kcarruthers I haven’t heard about most things.

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@miss_shiny My pleasure. Also, I need to get out more.

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@miss_shiny You could also have a Bananaby Split for dessert, or something with Pyne Nuts.

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@miss_shiny It’s the truffle oil. And the leather jacked. And I don’t think you can get leatherjackets (fish) in Sydney,Or make waffles.

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@miss_shiny Oh FFS, it’s easy. Aged beef in truffle oil, duck(bill) in shortbread pastry (or short soup, so wontons), and a greens salad.

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@dobes @GordyPls Look, I have a response to this, and my response is that you’re in Taipei right now, so suck it up, Sunshine.

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On a related note, @paulwallbank, is that event really called “Silicon Dragon”? FFS give me strengagon

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[Checks calendar.] It’s not 1997, is it? https://t.co/dvH7WP3iQp

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So this is not actually possible, since it’s still May. Don’t let these people play with any sharp objects. https://t.co/kr8PdGKGgt

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@Asher_Wolf @BundyB They’re big on formality in Asia, so yeah big mistakere

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@markhumphries All good. So many people have had a weird day. I think it must all the part of God’s Plan.

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I’d planned to announce tonight who’s on the panel for Saturday’s recording but people aren’t answering email. https://t.co/jqZ2Iv6OU0

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Mate, if you put a dolphin into a cement mixer you’ll get into all sort of serious trouble. Trust me, I know. https://t.co/eLjUIKLyIX

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Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with you people? Have you no self-awareness whatsoever? (That’s a rhetorical question.)

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The Sydney fintech community is planning a push into Asia, so they’ve got all the diversity issues covered. pic.twitter.com/8lK4PqfMnp

via Twitter for iPhone

So 9 of the 20 first-round audience spots have already gone. You should grab yours now. https://t.co/LQmXfQhW64 https://t.co/cP2UULUdld

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daniels_den “a lack of cyclones” RT @abclandline prices slump as warm, wet winter causes glut ab.co/1U9K8nm pic.twitter.com/l3mcCyVHRT

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 6:50 PM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@venessapaech @paulwallbank I hope you’ve sprayed the disinfectant at him.

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@jturner_ibrs You have no idea how relieved I am.

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Remind me again how a man buying flowers for his wife is election news? https://t.co/k3fG54lHjO

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Remind me again how a man buying flowers for his wife is election news? https://t.co/t68Y05zKWI

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dobes Media landscape for 2016. Just needs bankruptcy court to complete the set. pic.twitter.com/dOAKobY4mh

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 6:01 PM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

Hey look, everyone! Sydney traffic is perfect again. And it’s not even 1800 yetpic.twitter.com/cwgG1RtBrqrq

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@ashirben Yes, @paulwallbank, ask here. Twitter is a safe space.

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@ClintonDucas Well it wouldn’t do any harm, so yeah.

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BIG PLUG: “The 9pm Edict’s Public House Forum #3” is recorded this Saturday afterstilgherrian.com/edict/00058a/spic.twitter.com/xGdUUq3t8RUq3t8R

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The pleuting is getting worse out there, @glengyron. pic.twitter.com/umBgNCi2eh

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And the rest are low-doc home loan scams? https://t.co/97jyUn6o73

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@rpy @glengyron Yeah, pictures of slack-jawed gawking SMH readers going base over apex into puddles are always fun.

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So tell me more about your plan to go look at the pretty lights, @glengyron. pic.twitter.com/9X9t3YTEBy

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@rashasman Quite probably. I get all my best advice from YouTube.

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It’s easier to put coloured cellophane over a Dolphin torch, chuck it into a cement mixer, and scoff some bad acid. https://t.co/705nq7afvc

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How’s the North Shore going with its CYBERCRIME EPIDEMIC? Make it through the day OK? https://t.co/mVHAeeZcFq

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@BernardKeane With the emphasis on “semi-detchaed”.

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@BernardKeane Well, NSW Greens are more or less an inner-west semi-detached property-value maintenance organisation.

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@BernardKeane I addressed this issue earlier in the month. https://t.co/fgOJFud6Sr

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opsecanimals

-Wear a balaclava
-Use a disposable phone purchased with cash
-Arrive a few hours early to keep an eye on things

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 4:05 PM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

crikey_news Today’s @deptofaustralia. Birds, you’re next. pic.twitter.com/aRsRG7Ru1e

via Buffer (retweeted on 4:04 PM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

I supposed that having to sleep for three hours today, as opposed to four hours yesterday, is something of an improvement.

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@agelastic @xntrik This is a true thing which is true.

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“Abbott, a loudmouth with a loony streak, was in some ways a precursor of Donald Trump.” https://t.co/u0JrZhiktO

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Well have you ever tried huffing paint from a tin? https://t.co/SsGp8TG3Mn

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joshgnosis I stumbled upon the Christian Democrats Facebook page. :\ pic.twitter.com/CSvFuj9hXz

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 11:42 AM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

My eyes are starting to fall out of my face and it’s not even midday yet.

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@alexkidman Could you perhaps make me a brief video, so I’ve got the technique down right?

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@aqualung Plastic elephants always confuse me too.

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@aqualung African elephant numbers are 450,000 to 700,000, apparently. https://t.co/zkjwUTnfMX That’s a lot of London buses.

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So have you actually tried typing while reading the computer screen while drinking coffee? Go on, give it a go. https://t.co/FquVAgoRQg

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Wow, I never knew that African elephants were made of plastic. https://t.co/EzhI4nsck4

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tfswebb AUSTRALIA IN COMBAT, a timeline
1910’s: world war one
1930’s: emu wars
2010’s: pic.twitter.com/BKRtU0qva6

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 11:21 AM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@shenmaxiu I couldn’t comment on that. I don’t get to Wollongong very often.

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These people seriously need to get out more. https://t.co/rQ18h4YET4

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@shellity @patstokes @shenmaxiu @oberonsghost I’m starting ti like this whole concept even more.

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@christopherneal Agreed. I don’t think this will end well.

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EXCELLENT WE WILL BE ABLE TO TORTURE THE ROBOTS. https://t.co/pxLDqte05a

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Tue plan, redraft: Organise podcast talent; bookkeeping; write for @zdnetaustralia, if I make it that far; stay warm throughout.

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So I still have a cold.

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@KompleatKnut @TheNTNews No let’s not as@guardianstylele ’cos they can’t do proper orthography for NASA or ASIO and they will burn in Hell.

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I think @TheNTNews has finally got woke about donkeys.

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RT @flensomatic: @SwiftOnSecurity @NorthSydTweetup @stilgherrian auuugh no I caught the bug!!! im cybercrimes now. Dont touch its contagious

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Well here’s a question that I hadn’t considered before. https://t.co/tYOkOVsnaY

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@mrgrumpystephen You’ve got a pencil in your nose?

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@R_Chirgwin Oh I am listening to AM, but the idea of Christopher Pyne visiting Elizabeth has kept me going.

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JazzTwemlow Good morning all. Global warming continues and the political system has abandoned you. Cloudy to overcast westerly.

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 8:22 AM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

So Sydney traffic is improving* as the morning unfolds… pic.twitter.com/5undijcRyc

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@mrgrumpystephen We have a secret ballot in Australia, Stephen, and that information is between me and my pencil.

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This is excellent advice, given the statistics. https://t.co/7g4UqiMfiw

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Oh what’s Pyne squawking on about now?

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Right, I’d better make some breakfast and see whether I can get enough brain cells firing long enough to get some serious work done today.

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Yes, @EuanRitchie1 @NuclearAnthro, where “awesome” means “lying unconscious and upside-down in a pile of your own excrement”. Kinda hot.

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WHO. THE. FUCK. CARES.

Serve the electorate. Don’t service the Canberra spin doctors. Well, not unless they’re hot.

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Which means deciding who is “winning” the campaign is really just judging who happened to re-bleat their talking points with fewer stumbles.

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Far too much political coverage is just stenography of party X saying party Y is bad or random punters giving uninformed tribal feelpinions.

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Journalists should interrupt, “We’re not interested in you saying the other side is bad. Let’s look at YOUR policy.” https://t.co/h5ULiAnDK2

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Dear Infosec and Cyberfolk in Victoria, please comment on electronic voting in a way that might make a difference. https://t.co/sm4kzrxGvT

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So yeah, Sydney traffic is a mess right now, especially that 15km bank-up down Campbelltown way. pic.twitter.com/r01IzarfNK

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@i386 I’ve just heard the latest traffic report. It’s a mess out there.

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Reminder: “The 9pm Edict’s Public House Forum #3” is recorded this Saturday afterstilgherrian.com/edict/00058a/spic.twitter.com/xGdUUq3t8RUq3t8R

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Plus talk of reducing the pull factors is just code for telling refugees that Australia will treat them like shit. Yeah good work, @AlboMP.

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You know, @AlboMP, talk of “pull factors” and “push factors” is pretty dehumanising. https://t.co/NwDA6GIGcz

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BREAKING: It rained in Sydney overnight and it is still raining so the entire city has descended into utter chaos.

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@davispg I’ll approach the editor later. There shall be words.

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@MsLods I’d heard from Dr Teague that one was in the works. I suppose I should read the thing.

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@irisherself @calestous Why does this book have a glass buttplug on the cover?

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Also, there’s a magazine called “Northshore Living”? God, give me strength. https://t.co/mVHAeeZcFq

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“A ‘Kung Fury’ Sequel Is In The Works” https://t.co/CG7xfTb6YV HT @jeamland

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@jeamland Well this indeed good and sensible news.

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@NuclearAnthro @EuanRitchie1 Wombats are grumpy little shits and made of concrete and grumpy.

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@R_Chirgwin @trentyarwood @cheshireb BUT IT SOUNDS SO SCIENCEY SO YOU JUST SHUT UP AGILE NIMBLE INNOVATION IDEASBOOM.

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@sylmobile @cheshireb @trentyarwood Where RTA is road traffic accident. I think the medical abbreviation is MVA for motor vehicle accident.

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@sylmobile @cheshireb @trentyarwood For age 1-14 top five are certain malignant neoplasms, submersion, more neoplasms, RTA, cerebral palsy.

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@trentyarwood @cheshireb Yes, that’s also an issue. Kill broad science-directed research, replace with politics-directed research.

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“Data61’s mission to wipe out the password”, writes @parisbcowan https://t.co/JAjN4Hebcz

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@trentyarwood @cheshireb That I am a terrible person is a fact well established for many years now.

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@trentyarwood @cheshireb I asked because “children”, “cancer” and “genetics research” press a lot of buttons during an election campaign.

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@trentyarwood @cheshireb And HIV requires long-term management, so hard to compare? Anyway, the overall message is that it is significant.

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@NuclearAnthro Quolls, on the other hand. Or even quokkas.

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@NuclearAnthro @EuanRitchie1 You haven’t actually met a wombat, have you.

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@sylmobile No, I’m in Sydney all this week.

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@garystark @riskybusiness I did. It’s a little piece of silly linguistics I use from time to time.

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@trentyarwood @cheshireb Thanks for all that. So it IS significant. And I’m guessing the genetics research will have spinoffs.

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Tue plan, draft: Organise podcast talent; write for @zdnetaustralia; bookkeeping; 1830 @OpenAustralia meetup https://t.co/5Axf8Ee6UL.

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@riskybusiness My plan was only to emphasise “wrong” as “wrog”, but now that you point it out, yeah, I’ll claim the credit.

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Now @AusElectoralCom and @cnn have got me very confused about the battle for Falluja. https://t.co/pHn8GP3lxT https://t.co/JnDQ44IO2m

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So, humourless support for a low-factuality demagogue, @riskybusiness? WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WROMG?

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RT @riskybusiness: It took me a while to figure out this guy isn’t posting these as satire… https://t.co/goNwfVSewb

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RT @riskybusiness: Trump fan art really is something hey… https://t.co/lGs6B83kNA

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2. Why map the DNA only of cancer patients? We could map the DNA of every newborn and then use it to… oh… yeah… that human rights thing.

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1. Childhood cancer is obviously frightening, but where is it on the scale of childhood health risks? @cheshireb @trentyarwood

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“Malcolm Turnbull to announce Coalition’s $20m childhood cancer genetics program” https://t.co/31qHABNQg9 I have two questions…

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So, @TheNTNews, what are you going to do about this? https://t.co/Jj45ISJ8Wm

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@shenmaxiu @oberonsghost And perhaps also in relation to increased gin or tea consumption.

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shiftkey to be fair though, look at this kangaroo pic.twitter.com/8HEuzmB8Ep

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 5:40 AM, May 31st, 2016 via TweetDeck)

RT @shiftkey: australia: where the cows and kangaroos are more deadly than sharks and crocodiles? https://t.co/mWGAfKghX4

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This is excellent news, and I know @oberonsghost will be thrilled*. https://t.co/t5A33s2Rwr

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There’s more from Dr Vanessa Teague on electronic voting at 32m15s into this Corrupted Nerds podcast from Nov 2015corruptednerds.com/pod/c00013/y9

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“Voting security in Australia” from @amworldtodaypm https://t.co/kdtZ6rvReC in which Dr Vanessa Teague highlights some problems.

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I also like the impact of its announcement. https://t.co/pxuCbg6Akm

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I really do like this “Midsomer Murders Plot Generatorâpatrickstokes.com/?page_id=8666pic.twitter.com/qYmqQlJ9ZsQlJ9Zs

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Early risers, “The 9pm Edict’s Public House Forum #3” is recorded this Saturday afterstilgherrian.com/edict/00058a/spic.twitter.com/xGdUUq3t8RUq3t8R

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Trust @jeamland to get the wrong end of the stick. https://t.co/Y68iitA7pH

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Tuesday. No, I assure you it is the same size. There’s no need to keep asking me, because that is my answer. Tuesday.

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I also expect a pony, world peace, and a gift basket of some sort.

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I’m off to bed. By tomorrow morning, I expect all first-round audience spots to be gone, and four interesting guests to have volunteered.

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@MolksTVTalk I’m hoping that in the new financial year I can do them in other cities.

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@MolksTVTalk Well, I hope so. I need to find the appropriate D-grade celebrities first.

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I’ve been slothing today because of a cold, but I’ll be organising the talent tomorrow and announcing the panellists tomorrow night.

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So yeah, “The 9pm Edict’s Public House Forum #3” is being recorded this Saturday 4 stilgherrian.com/edict/00058a/spic.twitter.com/xGdUUq3t8RUq3t8R

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Well try this. Exactly the same line-up, but naked in a spa bath full of olive oil. https://t.co/4OWaC8vLGM

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@AlisterAir @ConversationEDU Oh it’s an actual sentence, and grammatically OK, but it’s a terribly old-fashioned literary affectation.

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Pollytics Twitter, never change. pic.twitter.com/qxeURK1aIP

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“How unpleasant the @ConversationEDU can make sentences for people who dare to read their tweets.” — @stilgherrian https://t.co/B6jTgygmBI

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I think we all need to savour the moment. https://t.co/esYJBa7FYA

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RT @ABCemergency: #ICYMI Records broken for coldest May morning in eight areas across NSW, @BOM_au confirms https://t.co/zc8pZpvJVc https:/…

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