Looks like we’re in the wrong cafe. https://t.co/hckdKidomm
RT @SquigglyRick: Omg guys how good is the dance scene from Call me by Your Name I’ve posted it here with permission https://t.co/NFcnjmnOiX
“Alexander Downer†and “drinking buddies†are not a thing. https://t.co/swEnSiyU34
RT @AMNH: Next time you eat guacamole, thank a giant ground sloth: the Lestodon! These 15-ft animals ate avocado whole, traveled, and then…
RT @elzxbth: You tried to warn us. https://t.co/tm1xrGUt9o
RT @angryaboutbikes: The three types of “Amateur Historian”:
1) Owns a metal detector and muddy wellies
2) Has 400 books on the history of…
@SnarkyPlatypus I can think of worse.
I suppose it’s hard to celebrate NYE, and especially hard to let off fireworks, inside the Cupboard. So this is all… https://t.co/dgaX2hGgKf
Sun plan: The “potter around the house eating and drinking†turned into slothing, but now I’ll keep going until the… https://t.co/MIqZQDtOaU
Goddam cicadas.
RT @AndrewBGreene: Pretty sure President Trump’s supporters are gonna lose their minds when they discover @AlexanderDowner was a “Liberal P…
RT @ClickHole: Emotional Rant: Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey Apologized For Letting Nazis Use His Platform When It’s Intended Only For Letting El…
RT @alexdecampi: Heyyy so I heard Marvel is letting us make our own comics now and there are some rules about stuff we have to include? Any…
RT @AndrewBGreene: Americans are now sending herograms to Alexander Downer thanking him for his reported role in kicking off the FBI’s Russ…
Sun plan, draft: Potter around the house eating and drinking until the world ends. I mean, until the year ends. Fourteen hours to go.
@twiddlekins @NuclearAnthro The Hello Kitty look could work too.
@twiddlekins @NuclearAnthro Ain’t it cute though.
@NuclearAnthro This reminds me, I haven’t caught up with the latest adventures of Mr Peanut.
@NuclearAnthro Ah that makes sense.
@NuclearAnthro Amongst other things, I hope, because the Gryphon is slightly obscure.
@NuclearAnthro And this is all before a coffee. I can see how my brain generated both “W84†and “No, that’s wrongâ€â€¦ https://t.co/bMjQOESsSW
@NuclearAnthro “Tonight on ‘Know Your Nuclear Warhead’…†But if I say “W84†I’m pretty sure I don’t get the bonus points.
@NuclearAnthro Is it sad that I took one glance at that and thought “Davy Crockett warhead�
I really am liking this quite a lot. https://t.co/acUGwIVgjO
@developerjack None of those things.
@jpwarren I’m still very confused.
Histreepix The residents of Gotham City summon Santa. 1956. pic.twitter.com/hUFPLCAREk
RT @jacquidark: Yeah, that Joan Sullivan sure could hold a tune! Please, @theheraldsun, re-hire some editors!!! #australianicon #howdoyouge…
I just had a two-hour dream about arguing over the correct size for a paper aircraft, railway timetables, and regis… https://t.co/ou5Q2SiQhn
Sunday. Extensions will not be granted. Sunday.
RT @Kate_McClymont: A twice bankrupted self-proclaimed lord, who claims to be Prince Philip’s love child, is using a mysterious document, w…
@mogadeet She’d lost it long before that.
Oh stop your complaining.
RT @nickschadegg: seven hours. he didn’t even last seven hours. https://t.co/M2YzEfYO7m
@SnarkyPlatypus Maybe not.
@DamianM I see what you did there.
@mediajorge Yes, but only a small start.
Don’t get me wrong. Ms Greer is lovely to drink with at 10am before going on stage — true story — but this far past… https://t.co/wbjuLeqmDv
Is there some sort of Germaine Greer tracking and alert site?
Whew. For a moment then I thought the Woman Of A Certain Age in the beer garden was Germaine Greer and I thought th… https://t.co/qKY3XlliPO
@mediajorge Well I would support this policy.
This, for example. https://t.co/QwJJwOx1Nx
And people wonder why I drink. https://t.co/YeEZrFaRHk
2018 is going to be pretty fucked, eh.
Quiet pre-shopping pint.
RT @upulie: Entirely normal person https://t.co/rfvsWDMAjq
@iiTalW It’s the best kind of Twitterporn.
So, you’ve seen “A Clockwork Orange� https://t.co/uLhkR1bwUv
@nehadk Je suis not an idiot.
Oh good, I could use winning the lotto. pic.twitter.com/W0S0MQFslf
I’d leave the shopping until tomorrow except that it’ll be busy with all the last-minute party shoppers and the like.
Sat plan: Sleep in and slow start (done); shopping, Katoomba (a bit later); meals ad lib. There’s a strong sense of CBF about today.
Cicadas.
Saturday. Rattle or gurgle, but not both. Saturday.
@NewtonMark @warkolm Look. Is it chocolate or not?
@NewtonMark What’s “Bitcoin�
@benpobjie Roger that.
@benpobjie Does it have to be secretly?
RT @peter_tonoli: TIL that ‘#’, ‘%’, ‘&’, ‘=’, ‘/’ and ‘<’ are called ‘hacking characters’. #hacking #infosec https://t.co/3J2Z78HfuM
RT @drmistercody: Guys, thank you for your brave tuxedos. https://t.co/owW8oEXTNn
australian PM to be penalised over dodgy dinghy behaviour.
bit.ly/2BL14zn
dekrazee1 elarroyo_atx’s photo instagram.com/p/BdQS0u7BZMO/ So true
RT @Stonekettle: This guy. https://t.co/bie1ytDXaX
johnmcternan Twitter, you know what to do. pic.twitter.com/NUgpo4aa3I
Just in case you’d started to think, for some reason, that Bono wasn’t a tosser, a reminder. https://t.co/oFLRfXTM1o
Friday. Which just goes to show you. Friday.
RT @SydneyTom_: Malcolm Turnbull Memorial Swimming Centre has a nice ring to it https://t.co/YzDVm2r9W6
@JohnBirmingham Don’t believe everything you read.
@dobes That’s probably for the best.
@JohnBirmingham There are better things to judge me on.
@dobes You shouldn’t listen to that rubbish.
This will be awesome, @dobes. https://t.co/M269E89PMJ
@garystark Look for a (very brief) paper titled “On Bullshitâ€. It makes the point that this is the defining aspect of bullshit, cf lies.
@corduroy I think the trick is to not read the twat.
RT @veryann0yed: my dad said sex ed shouldn’t be the responsibility of public schools, but parents, and i told him that’s a weird tack to t…
Every now and then I end up admiring Trump for the sheer audacity of his bullshit. This is one of those times. https://t.co/X4fAhy8N2d
Why not? We ship ordinary fuckin’ water from France. https://t.co/R83DapCLzt
Oh wait. 30 toes. No, I misread that as 30 tons.
Same. https://t.co/l1Yr4IRAl3
maryellenmurr this is especially funny if you imagine the lizard nuns wrote and submitted it pic.twitter.com/l1k5Jfd50o
@dr_nic Well that’s not down to me.
@dr_nic Way ahead of you.
@garystark @R_Chirgwin @GordyPls @bigyahu You’d need a fuck of a lot of mosquitoes.
@garystark @R_Chirgwin @GordyPls @bigyahu Stop that.
@R_Chirgwin @garystark @GordyPls @bigyahu You want the smoker walking around by itself?
@R_Chirgwin @GordyPls @bigyahu @garystark BTW, I’ve used this procedure on an excess of garden snails and they fry… https://t.co/nRnR3W1Lo8
@R_Chirgwin @GordyPls @bigyahu @garystark Fuckin’ backpackers. You’d have to do the thing you do with snails and fe… https://t.co/Bs7Nk9Zu6F
RT @staffo_sez: So, Simon & Schuster rejected Milo’s MS because its arguments were weak. Imagine if this fundamental standard was applied b…
@R_Chirgwin @garystark @GordyPls @bigyahu Mate. Your kids are too skinny. No meat on them. Not worth it.
@NewtonMark Why?
@DavidRDHeath Yes, the least creepy option is that one of the nearby houses has run out of parking space so there they are.
@GingerGorman Hah! These are excellent. Yes, this is the life!
@garystark Mind you, it probably won’t end well.
@GingerGorman See this is the thing. So much of our work can be easily done in our underwear with a gin and tonic close at hand.
@garystark I shall take your advice.
RT @nehadk: Daily Mail: Old Muslim man (might be affiliated with ISIS) lies to young innocent Christian boy. https://t.co/NVVtjy2VYc
I’d have said it was down to containerisation and bulk handling. https://t.co/4Znnk4c3Lq
Is today a work day? Should I be doing some work?
@DavidRDHeath That does seem to be the business proposition. Curious that it’s parked at a private hotel in Ashfiel… https://t.co/7lco4qeTZl
So here’s a thingpic.twitter.com/a1Z13K8BaGaG
RT @jpwarren: This will test the adequacy of our strategic shadenfreude reserves. https://t.co/qgdxuKQ7iq
@misskylie77 No such place.
@bigyahu Nothing half a dozen A-10s couldn’t fix.
This is worth considering. pic.twitter.com/FAJU2IOcrE
@elle_franks That’s great, but do they have to be in the same thing.
@elle_franks What is wrong with you?
I’m listening to the latest episode of the “Beef And Dairy Network Podcastâ€. Two minutes in and I’m already in love… https://t.co/1WMZfvSRaL
RT @mikenelson586: This is good content https://t.co/drHMo8lao3
@nickzoic I’m just calling for a little lawn’order.
@BlogsofWar Maybe we could cyber the crypto.
@kjmci I quite like this typo too.
If there’s not a lawn against this there should be. https://t.co/M1i3u13ezJ
Thu plan: Tidy all the things (almost all done, apart from concealing the gin theft); lunch, somewhere; train to We… https://t.co/ZVzeVgzlC8
@johnb78 True. In hindsight, I should have let it stand.
crashrosbe Someday I hope to be as brave as my one year old daughter who just kneeled down and took a shit in the middle of the Toronto airport.
@johnb78 Mate, you’ve got rocks, tree things, and laminex. What more do you need?
RT @TheOnion: Rodent Clearly Making Its Way Through Steve Bannon’s Body Throughout National Security Meeting https://t.co/SBEQ5p097d #OurAn…
@wombat1974 OK, thats’s a fair argument.
@wombat1974 Brutalism has a point, though many people don’t get it. These are just dumb blocks.
RT @OaaSvc: 🤔 https://t.co/Ax7i7zPC29
@wombat1974 We live in the age of Pointless Concrete Blocks. It’s wonderful.
RT @darkhorse166: Demolish their apartments. https://t.co/ptuMc8UjAu
ComfortablySmug Humans definitely won’t regret creating robot snakes with lasers on their heads
pic.twitter.com/RhWldxmnWq
RT @wilfredchan: was that chopsticks placement also ‘inspired by asia’ 💀 https://t.co/xG4ixOsOd3
RT @CNNnewsroom: “You Can’t See Me” ⌠💀 A large truck is attempting to block cameras from capturing video of President Donald Trump golfi…
@bluntshovels I do like that we know specifically which of these arsehats we’re talking about.
Thu plan, draft: Tidy all the things; lunch, somewhere; train to Wentworth Falls; reading en route, maybe; lazy eve… https://t.co/6yIeAXNGYr
johnb78 This may be the most middle class problems protest sign in history pic.twitter.com/o523Ll8sKx
@bluntshovels Yes, that’s would be this guy. https://t.co/DRmIvPzSUB
Thursday. Things should be just one thing. Things should not be two things. Thursday.
Stop retweeting things as if you understand what they mean.
RT @MadRadhu: Here’s an image of the Japanese Internment Camps we built during WW2. The memorial we built for these says “Here we admit a w…
I think I was at this party. https://t.co/yU0xULrXI9
@RealNickHodge Oh I like that.
@tacticalmaid It’s OK, I was making a “joke†about being old.
Untitled, 27 December 2017. pic.twitter.com/RKYzTN2GR2
@JohnBirmingham Is that a thing?
@tacticalmaid I used to drink with him at that pub that isn’t there any more.
@michaelneale Well, has to kill them. Obviously.
Cruel but fair. https://t.co/oHA2TGJszN
@michaelneale Nipples don’t count.
@tacticalmaid Nobody ever tells me anything interesting.
@tacticalmaid This needs some work, but “Tom Clancy’s Of The Overflow�
Worst superpower ever. pic.twitter.com/rW9kaH0lt2
Is there any way to remotely cause Airpods to deliver a fatal electrical discharge? Asking for a friend.
RTYI @SnarkyPlatypus. Not the first time I’ve seen this image. https://t.co/NqXjGhUuVo
@franksting I think I understand what you mean. Keep up the good work, Breeder Soldier.
@franksting @purserj @swearyanthony @GordyPls Because cunts.
@GordyPls There’s a lot in this whole scenario that I don’t understand.
@GordyPls Wearing pyjamas is a thing that happens when you’re married I guess.
Timeless tweet. https://t.co/bXjWufbInE
@johncarneyau Ideally, all of them.
@kjmci I believe so.
@kjmci You may not be across the range of placenta-based products already on the market.
@gths Oh,that was referring to a different arsehat.
@kjmci Next up, placenta absinthe.
STOP RETWEETING THAT ARSEHAT.
@R_Chirgwin @jonoabroad Fried beef is no laughing matter.
@R_Chirgwin @jonoabroad Richard. Rent boys are not for cooking.
RT @ota3566: 在推特首é 看到CCTV推出一套å為《如果國寶會說話》的紀錄片，å³æ™‚æµ®ç¾é€™å¹…圖 https://t.co/O1AapMLRb8
Why bother with this bullshit? The man doesn’t pay contractors who he’s got, like, a contract with. He ain’t gonna… https://t.co/DQeMoK9mJo
@ajft Do you have something against bats?
@spottytwit Oh I like this.
@twiddlekins Keep up the good work, Soldier.
@Rashas_Mo @RealNickHodge So would I.
@RealNickHodge When you say “Go full Zodiac’…
@RealNickHodge Sure, but they’re not buried.
@poddiguy @jaybeware Also, in reality. (Sorry.) Yep, this has been part of America for a long time. And other nations.
RT @SixthTone: A married man reflects on his 12 years in the sex industry — how he became a husband, father, and sex worker
This is our mo…
RealNickHodge @Rashas_Mo I know chemtrails contain gluten. #science
For starters, deep-fried beef. pic.twitter.com/fNEQddTkdz
Now that I think about it, I wish I had the resources to make random weird shit and hide it in caves or bury it in… https://t.co/UsknJA1zC6
This is magnificent. These are difficult birds to photograph. https://t.co/PkSXLtP4Y4
RT @RealSardonicus: On June 1836 five young boys, hunting for rabbits on the north-eastern slopes Arthur’s Seat, Edinburgh, found 17 miniat…
@munin We are such sad fucks.
Everyone’s all for air safety until it causes them a little personal inconvenience. https://t.co/wZGf87jgUt
I would watch this movie. https://t.co/3PM9yHUOW4
RT @NewtonMark: Christmas lights. (ping @chrisbrownie @simonhackett @raaahbin @thewildgoose @ndrewreid) https://t.co/L9mEFoKdid
@jonoabroad $350 for an hour plus cab fares.
RT @jc_cummins: An update on the Melbourne crocodile: “four people have called trying to claim ownershipâ€
https://t.co/9EDwd4HirM
@brentspargo @NewtonMark @simonhackett It’s all OK. @simonhackett can take care of himself. He is more than aware of me.
@NewtonMark @simonhackett I guess they do.
@egadheg I see what you mean.
So this is happening right now. pic.twitter.com/JvOPt9Pp13
@egadheg I’ll have another look myself.
@NewtonMark @simonhackett Those cunts.
@garthk I do see. pic.twitter.com/I8gr7SO70S
@egadheg I wonder what you’d have said about the stump-jump plough back in the day.
@travisbynight Fair enough.
@egadheg That said, the actual job of fence posts is to be narrow yet strong.
RT @jaybeware: In case anyone didn’t know this was an actual thing: https://t.co/oe4AI4Cuc7 https://t.co/YNfc2mIrE5
@travisbynight Is this the benchmark scenario?