OK, I’m going away now. I’ll continue laughing at the Disaster of Everything tomorrow morning Sydney time.
phbarratt Twenty years ago today: commissioning of HMAS Farncomb, at Fremantle. Second Collins Class submarine commissioned i..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…kN
@NicholasFryer As was the custom in those times.
@NicholasFryer Be grateful you didn’t have to endure the original. Mind you, my first experience of Solaris was ham..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…3b
@jonoabroad This will not end well. (Hi to Anna, the brains of the outfit.)
WE ARE ALL ABOUT INNOVATION WHICH IS WHY WE HAVE THE SAME INTERIOR DECOR AS EVERYONE ELSE PLEASE DON’T HURT US.
WHY DO NONE OF THESE PLACES HAVE CEILINGS? twitter.com/LandingPadsAU/…
@NicholasFryer That’s still a puma. As long as you’ve got the half with the serial number.
CanberraDSN 🎼”This is the way we wash the dish,
wash the dish, wash the dish.
This is the way we wash the dish,
so we can sing..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…YE
@NicholasFryer If you have a puma then I dibs first watch of the video.
madashelltv Speaking of embracing Australian progress, Tony Abbott needs to move on from his black armband view of the Turnbull leadership.
#MadAsHell
@MoviusC I’ll put money on 50% plus of those saying they have deep learning not actually having those things. Also, thanks.
@NicholasFryer It’s not cruelty if you unlock the door before dawn.
mitchwongho Not if you wear it upside down twitter.com/Afrihost/statu…
markleggett Toto’s line-up (L to R):
- Your dad’s friend.
- Your step-dad.
- Your dad’s friend, who is an architect.
- Your dad..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…SW
@engin_eer An entire generation fucked up from huffing Peppa Pig.
Since when was it “deep” learning? I suppose since every data breach was down to a “sophisticated” attack, and ever..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…rc
Has anyone thought of sacrificing Caleb to wild dogs? Full Moon is in about four hours.
@jturner_ibrs Long story.
This is probably down to all the cultural Marxism. twitter.com/jturner_ibrs/s…
@pingudownunder @abcnews Mission Accomplished.
Fire is awesome. twitter.com/dannolan/statu…
@dez_blanchfield Brilliant track, I know it well.
@oberonsghost @pikyaa @miss_shiny @pleasedontatme So did they.
@chrisdeerin @johnmcternan @pawboy2 Yes, trawling through second-hand shops can be very rewarding… ;twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…Li
@christopherneal Exactly.
@pikyaa @oberonsghost @miss_shiny @pleasedontatme Building new suburbs is what these guys do for a living. They kno..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…Ez
@pikyaa @oberonsghost @miss_shiny @pleasedontatme Yeah they found a bit of that too.
@oberonsghost @pikyaa @miss_shiny @pleasedontatme Pretty much. One comment was “When ground water ran into the hole..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…wU
JoshBBornstein Soft interview with George Christiansen breached ABC standards
about.abc.net.au/complaints/bre…
@dobes Excellent. As long as it’s on the blockchain, because that will automate fact-checking.
@patstokes I am liking this even more.
I suppose it goes OK, apart from the whole being-a-Nazi thing. twitter.com/abcbrisbane/st…
I would watch this last one. twitter.com/patstokes/stat…
patstokes So how does a sequel to the synoptic gospels work? Jesus reluctantly comes out of retirement for one last job? The..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…z5
joshgnosis Today is a big win for Hanlon’s razor. en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hanlon%27…
cxi Did you know that Franklin Roosevelt was part Robot too, and he’s on Mt Rushmore?
@DDsD @zdnetaustralia The pole dancing gig less so.
@zdnetaustralia There’s actually several sites with several different variants. Cute. By which I mean turds.
@zdnetaustralia Wow. Some bot has rewritten my story for an advertising trap and it’s amazing. newsvire.com/vicroads-to-fi…
IjeomaOluo I have a badass niece who dumps any dude the moment he tries to make her less than she is in any way. One dude comp..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…UQ
BradMossEsq John Yoo.
John Yoo says the President has gone too far.
Now I’ve seen everything. twitter.com/nytopinion/sta…
I would like an emotional support peacock.
Correct, @abcnews. twitter.com/NewtonMark/sta…
jxeeno I keep all my RSA keys in a lockable filing cabinet and then chuck the keys away. AMA.
Me at @zdnetaustralia earlier: “VicRoads to fill identity theft pothole eventually” zdnet.com/article/vicroa… But not just yet.
@jodiem @zdnetaustralia It’s full of win.
NewtonMark Hey @chrisbrownie, do you feel safe in your home in Melbourne at the moment? Might want to call the cops, just to..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…EX
Is it a filing cabinet? twitter.com/BrianHonan/sta…
RichardTuffin This story is so 30 January now! twitter.com/MarkDiStef/sta…
@pikyaa @miss_shiny @pleasedontatme I spoke to some tradies who were coming in to build the suburb after the old Ne..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…sR
berniethoughts DOORS ARE WALLS THAT MOVE IF YOU KNOW THEIR SECRETS
@aspientiae I couldn’t say. I haven’t seen it.
@NewtonMark @jeamland @johnb78 There are many layers to all of that.
liamosaur How do you think these defence force members and other public servants feel when they hear that some parliamentary..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…uB
liamosaur … when the document was later found, still in a secure facility, he was charged, found guilty and demoted. His mi..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…in
liamosaur To put this in perspective, I knew of one defence force member who when shredding Secret documents, signed off that..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…Qq
ProfJeffJarviss New post on @Medium: Millennials Have Killed The Tide Pod
icowid As by agreement between Suretly, Inc. and SURcoin Pte. Ltd., Suretly, Inc. will make every effort to drink “the tea”
@Davidramli @dobes Yeah I’m not taking that bet. :)
@jeamland @NewtonMark @johnb78 On a related note, a taxonomy of leaks. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
@dobes @Davidramli THE FILING CABINETS PLURAL. THERE’S TWO OF THEM.
@DecayRSO Pretty much.
@elronxenu Not specifically, but yes.
@DecayRSO Yes, that’s it! Thank you. And am I a sad puppy? Yes, I am a sad puppy.
Goddammit. I just spent ages trying to remember the title of the movie I wanted to mention. It was “Silent Running”..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…zq
kashanacauley Probably the same way they decide who has a broken taillight. twitter.com/uproxx/status/…
JoshButler honestly only a NSW government could so badly and repeatedly and perfectly bungle the simple act of putting a name..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…4d

pleasedontatme harbourside living redefined, to 15km up the parramatta river pic.twitter.com/K0pWt7WRNi
jpwarren Since you can request the format of #FOI documents, I might ask for my next set to be provided inside an old filing..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…ws
To be fair, we’ve all left a fiver in the pocket when dropping off the dry cleaning. twitter.com/BBCNewsAus/sta…
@Resign_In_Shame Click. On. The. Link.
@Resign_In_Shame Way bigger. Concorde is quite small.
“Russia’s Giant Nuclear Torpedo Is Apparently Real” warisboring.com/russias-giant-…

“Russia Puts the World’s Biggest Bomber Back Into Production” warisboring.com/russia-puts-th… pic.twitter.com/a907b929yi
@NewtonMark @simon_as_twit I am not at liberty to discuss this any further.
@simon_as_twit @NewtonMark Goodness me.
mhorsfall Is your kid texting about Perl?
$#$_: Nope, a cat stepped on your iPhone
!!$!: Still just the cat
*{\$@}: This mea..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…XS
They are so going to send The Van.
Kate_McClymont You can’t make this up: Salim Mehajer accused of assaulting a cabbie with an Eftpos machine. Maybe Salim uses that..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…XM

Today’s events have reminded me of this photo. pic.twitter.com/GjoDwWE42H

BenDroste Still relevant pic.twitter.com/SaQ2nQUyCE
Asher_Wolf Have you run your hand around the top of the recess to check for hidden compartments tho? twitter.com/newtonmark/sta…
NewtonMark Kinda surprised a top secret eyes-only locked filing cabinet in Canberra wasn’t full of refugee corpses, to be comp..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…kZ
@NewtonMark @zdnetaustralia I think the whole thing is nice to know. Everything is nice.

TheDweck I can’t believe they recast Barron pic.twitter.com/iu3D5Ci6d3
smurray38 Classified: OpShopSec
Yes, if only there were some way for the Prime Minister to tell us how he feels. twitter.com/ABCthedrum/sta…
@NewtonMark Well there’s this… twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
Asher_Wolf It is 5:05pm. Do you know where your filings cabinets are?
@citation_needed @zdnetaustralia @davispg Well, assuming the world doesn’t explode in some other way. The news cycl..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…fn
@citation_needed @zdnetaustralia @davispg This doesn’t surprise me in the least. I’ll have a poke around tomorrow.
“We’re Sorry To Inform You But There Is Now A Political Scandal Involving A Boat Named Ferry McFerryFace” buzzfeed.com/joshtaylor/fer…
@citation_needed @zdnetaustralia @davispg That’s a question on notice. I haven’t looked yet.
lanesainty “Premier Gladys Berejiklian backed her minister but refused to even say the words ‘Ferry McFerryface’ when asked ab..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…WB
@ashabeeeee Part B: “‘Self-confessed’ hacker faces court over alleged theft of 33 GoGet rides”..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…F6
Part A: “GoGet fleet booking system accessed, alleged attacker charged” by @ashabeeeee zdnet.com/article/goget-…

LeakyCabinet This will be all I have to say on the matter. #CabinetFiles pic.twitter.com/YLDF65Xs1h
Is DESERT LEAP the US Marines deployment near Darwin? SMS me Y or N from a number ending in 555. twitter.com/jetztgibtshaue…
@jpwarren That’s a very clever use of the internet.
@bsveen This is a slightly better theory, and one that matches the code name in a suitably corny fashion. twitter.com/jetztgibtshaue…
@jpwarren I’ve forgotten them.
@jpwarren I told them two weeks ago. You can see their response.
@SwooseGoose I’ll leave the jackrabbit exploration to people who get paid to do that sort of digging.
@bsveen I think it’s about repairing the rabbit-proof fence.
@kcarruthers It always was.
@Cuff_S @zdnetaustralia Isn’t it wonderful*!
* Not wonderful. The other thing.

InfoSecFriends Who would win? #TheCabinetFiles pic.twitter.com/EhZSgiWd0e
I reckon @troyhunt and @jpwarren and @riskybusiness will find this one amusing. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
Me at @zdnetaustralia: “VicRoads to fill identity theft pothole eventually” zdnet.com/article/vicroa…
@jplonie Yeah I know. And you know I know.
@incorrect Also, that list is only which documents were handled inappropriately.
@bsveen Just got that too, thanks. Well there’s your homework for the week sorted.
That’s enough digging into that for today. I’m on enough lists as it is without saying DESERT LEAP repeatedly. #TheCabinetFiles
So this document “Australia – United States Defence Trade Cooperation Treaty Cooperative Programs” (4 Apr 2017) listwitter.com/i/web/status/9…b8S8
Oh hello. The deployment of DESERT LEAP to Australia? What is DESERT LEAP? An initial Google was unfruitful…twitter.com/i/web/status/9…Me

Antarctica! #TheCabinetFiles pic.twitter.com/TYhFoSGyAj

This one too. #TheCabinetFiles pic.twitter.com/jPgxr7fndQ

I’d like to see this document lost from Wong’s office. #GoodEnough #TheCabinetFiles pic.twitter.com/W3n6SKuqVq
@MathewHounsell But, with many Australians there, at the very least there’d be an estimate of their numbers, and a..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…pz
@MathewHounsell That sounded snarky, sorry, it wasn’t meant to.
@MathewHounsell You mean UAE, our largest export market in the Middle East, and “a major hub for Australian firms l..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…ET
NickFeik As an editor I don’t really mean this but I really think the ABC missed an opportunity not calling it the The Filing Cabinet Cabinet Files
After all, Defence needs to have an answer when a Minister asks “How hard would it be to…?”
It’s Defence’s job to have plans for all manner of contingencies, ready to use at a moment’s notice. Don’t conflate..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…MW
politicsabc The Department of Prime Minister and Cabinet has called an urgent investigation into how #TheCabinetFiles ended up..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…dT
I know that there’s still many questions to be answered, but I think we can start to drawer some conclusions…twitter.com/i/web/status/9…QD
Which Senate committee should I be watching for the most laughs? #TheCabinetFiles
Paul_Karp Well, I’m watching charities in JSCEM and they weren’t consulted until after the bill was released so the analogy d..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…QI
@dobes So when did the bookshelves go in?
Oh @dobes this just gets betterer and betterer. twitter.com/joshgnosis/sta…
Story filed for @zdnetaustralia. It contains theft and a pissed-off citizen.
@twiddlekins @CrimeStatsVic That’s just in Frankston.

New rabbit-hole! @CrimeStatsVic’s “Offences Recorded – Data Visualisationcrimestatistics.vic.gov.au/crime-statisti…Rpic.twitter.com/U4e6AClh2727
It’s hard to stand up when your entire body is filling up with bile and contempt. twitter.com/krassenstein/s…
SICKOFWOLVES JUST A REMINDER THAT THE STATE OF THE UNION COULD BE REPLACED WITH THE BLOOD CURDLING SHRIEK OF AN ELK THAT HAS JUS..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…VQ
snurb_dot_info Why does the supermoon emoji look like a salami pizza made by a very stingy Domino’s wage-slave ? twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
@dobes Nah you can have that one for today. I want to get this licence thing off my list.

dobes I might need to write the next chapter in this ongoing saga. pic.twitter.com/HL4y5SSynX

bencjenkins brave, confidential filing cabinets pic.twitter.com/9zPd4zPmMe

Correct. pic.twitter.com/nwPYGkDWbq
I need to stop laughing and write this thing about a security breach which is, well, almost nothing now. The news cycle will bury me.
TimdeSousa SO MANY questions.
Who still thinks that physical filing cabinets with lockable drawers are adequate security for..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…O1
politicsabc Tony Abbott was warned against breaching cabinet confidentiality … but he did it anywaab.co/2DQxBoEittwitter.com/i/web/status/9…G2pt
TimdeSousa I regret that I have only one face to palm twitter.com/petersterne/st…
samanthamaiden CABINET LEAK:
“The Secretary of PM&C has initiated an urgent investigation. As this investigation has commenced it..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…Hv
@darrenpauli Mate, I’m not interested in your hobbies.
@dobes OK, so you and Nuke Boy had the same joke.
@jpwarren @NewtonMark Glad you could join us.
This is true. Right, @dobes? twitter.com/NuclearAnthro/…
dobes Cabinet leak from cabinets, you say.
I’m now buying all pentagons because I want the secret drone program docs
@NuclearAnthro @thegrugq @BlogsofWar Filing cabinets. Plural. Cabinet documents. Many. This is going to be so much, erm, fun.
timsenior Somewhere in Canberra, a public servant just remembered what that set of keys was for….
@NewtonMark Could be a while. We’ll all too busy laughing.
RTYI @thegrugq @BlogsofWar and everyone. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
@gths Here you go. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
NewtonMark Like “lucky dip” at a country fair. twitter.com/MatthewBevan/s…
@NewtonMark @R_Chirgwin Well I’ve used “hypershambles”, and @trentyarwood coined “fractalshambles”, so where do we go from here?
Just… Wow.
Wow.
Wow. Just… Wow.
@expectproblems @oliyoung @dobes No, but it’s still worth saying.
SydneyTom_ amazing news twitter.com/woodruffbets/s…
NewtonMark I like how the Australian Government has suffered the most serious classified document exfiltration in its entire h..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…5c
CAN I JUST SAY THAT 2018 IS SURPASSING EVEN MY WILDEST DREAMS AND I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO ANOTHER ELEVEN MONTHS OF WONDERFUL.
Tim_Beshara My dad once bought a second hand filing cabinet and it had asio documents about Yugoslavian links to a Melbourne bo..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…nS
tfswebb sent from my cabinet
ACTUAL CABINET LEAK! “The documents were in two locked filing cabinets sold at an ex-government sale in Canberra. T..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…1D
NewtonMark I love how the Australian Government is so fucked that even furniture is leaking against it. Wild!
NewtonMark THE CABINET FILES WERE LEAKED FROM AN ACTUAL CABINET BWAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH abc.net.au/news/2018-01-3…
@JonathanPieNews I agree with everything in this brief video essay. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
ATTENTION! ATTENTION! New @JonathanPieNews! “Football OUTRAGE!” youtube.com/watch?v=FOMoaS…
@oliyoung @dobes Knowing nothing about the games industry as such, except that @expectproblems is fabulous, I bow to your knowledge.
@dobes @oliyoung Isn’t Microsoft buying EA? Or was I hallucinating? #whynotboth
So does #SOTU mean the same as STFU?
@joshgnosis @zdnetaustralia Ah, thanks, Josh. Not quite what I was thinking, but similar. Cheers.
Column filed for @zdnetaustralia. It contains a Brave New World.
GonzoHacker Right about now they’re injecting Trump with his special stamina serum
YahooAnswersTXT Bitcoin?!? More like SHITCOIN! I bought some and it went DOWN!!!! Why it did that??
Wry ting.
Ex_spurt What to do with that innefective Govt employee? Put him in charge of the missile alert system, that never gets used..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…Bt
“Tests link Syrian government stockpile to largest sarin attack - sources” reuters.com/article/us-syr…

jrhennessy two incredibly normel men pic.twitter.com/mix8eMiXjk
@franksting I should give up on optimism.
@DDsD No.
And please can I have an invisible chocolate sparkle-pony for my birthday? Because, sadly, I suspect these outcomes are equally likely.,
Can we please, please, PLEASE not make this about journalists again? twitter.com/Sally_Jackson/…
dobes oh, oh, I know the answer to this one!! twitter.com/jpwarren/statu…

loserboy Flu info from a literal Doctor…who is funny. pic.twitter.com/j3zP0eW3rp
FoxNews Woman denied emotional support peacock on United flight fxn.ws/2nm6An6

oliyoung I’ve seen this movie, this doesn’t end well pic.twitter.com/1KPCc0YxPS
Right now the Cabinet has more leaks than a Welsh farmers market.
@dobes This is an investment opportunity you could really sink your teeth into.
FutureWiseAU When #dataretention was introduced in Australia, George Brandis pointed to the UK law as a model example of why Aus..twitter.com/i/web/status/9…nW
Everything is wonderful. twitter.com/GossiTheDog/st…