Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

December 9th, 2010

Before I go to sleep, I should say that I think it’s only fair that Australia gets Oprah while the US gets me.

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OK, bedtime for me. A busy day of recording tomorrow, as well as changing hotels.

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@jonoabroad I would like to hide out with friends in rural England, sure, but I don’t think it’s going to happen.

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Yes @jonoabroad I still have my dignity, which is more than I can say for some others. Also, I have plenty of material recorded.

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I am back at the hotel, with connectivity. So many things have just happened.

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Long, long speech then Q&A with Bill Clinton. Our brains are dead, need food and drink before processidf10

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Actually that message got delayed. Also Mr Clinton got delayed. So we had a 30-min chat with Stevie Wonder instead.

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Interviews done. Now waiting in a room of 15,000 people to hear Bill Clinton speak. No Wi-Fi from where I sit. Poo.

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My mind is starting to cave in. Too much information to absorb then interviews to record. And I didn’t stay out all night!

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For some reason Duran Duran’s “Union of the Snake” just came to mind. Time to watch the video?

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“Platforming” is a verb now, apparently. Well, that there is a gerund, but stop your whinging. Also a gerund.

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“The bottom line is that Salesforce.com is becoming a platform company.” Ah, pieces on a chess board…

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Currently in a lunch briefing about Salesforce.com’s purchase of Heroku. Message is no change, want to learn and extend.

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@SnarkyPlatypus Bonjour. Je ne parle pas Français aujourd’ui. Les Google, ils sont merde. Et vous, en Anglais?

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Mobile: Back to the hotel to change my shirt; hunt down some AA batteries; back to the Moscone Centre for more stuff.

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And the “keynote” is over. Two hours is, quite frankly, way too goddam long. See? I’m polite. I didn’t use the f-word. You’re welcome.

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Somehow “keynote” morphed from being an inspiring, focused speech into a drawn-out marketing presentation. How did that happen?

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It’s kinda creepy when middle-aged men in dark suits bond by showing each other the “individuality” of their rather similar socks.

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BMC announces RemedyForce. If you know Remedy’s service desk, then it’s that in the cloud with added buzzordiness.

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The hole in my shirt is tearing further now. I can no longer hide it behind my badge. And it’s a brand new shirt too.

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“They wanted to take it to the next level. They wanted it to go viral.” Sigh. Next level AND viral? Just say “popular” FFS!

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Hah! I just saw someone whinge that the Heroku guy sounded like he was making a pitch. Sheesh! THE WHOLE GODDAM EVENT IS A PITCH!

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Ruby. Productivity. Flexibility. Open. Leading. Cloud. Platform. Awesome. Optimised. Synergy. Cutting-edge. Buzzword. Doubleplusgood.

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Heroku is named and the purchase confirmed. Insert promo for Heroku from website copy, but in a more enthusiastic voice.

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Benioff announces their Ruby cloud. “Ruby on Rails really is the language of the cloud”. Database.com’s console written in Rails.

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Lengthy advertorial for UCSF, to which Benioff is a $100M donor.

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Today’s schtick: The model in Microsoft’s anit-Salesforce ads on stage being converted back to Salesforce.

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Benioff invokes the spirit of Intel’s Andy Grove: “Only the paranoid survive.” Invokes the spirit of the Salesforce Nation.

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Phase 2: Position Microsoft as the Evil Empire, trying to stop our fun. Trying to stop the revolution.

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Benioff: “You stayed with us for the whole program. You received the message.” Phase 1: connect with audience, be personal. s#df10

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Opening the keynote, it’s a montage video shot yesterday and edited overnight. “This is the best one yet.” Of course it is.

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The Dreamforce day 2 keynote that’s about to begin is being streamed live from http://www.salesforce.co…

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To be announced shortly: “Salesforce buy Heroku [Ruby on Rails cloud] for $212 million, eyes Ruby developers” http://arseh.at/2kf

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By “short”, I really meant “shirt”. Let’s not get carried away here!

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1. My short just ripped. 2. “George W Bush” is telling jokes. These two events may not be related.

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And… we’re back in The Vast hall of 14,000 people with the warm-up speaker Peter Coffee doing scripted interviews with vendors.

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Mobile: Exit the hotel; find a store to buy batteries; Moscone Centre; quick breakfast in media room; the Giant Room for the keynote.

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Wed (Thu) plan: Day 2 Salesforce.com’s Dreamforce SFO, inc Bill Clinton at 1700 PST and another dinner. So lots of interviews and recording.

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@anthonycole I suspect we’ll see the formal announcement of Salesforce.com buying Keroku in today’s keynote at 0900 PST.

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Il pleut dans la ville de Saint François.

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My first challenge this morning, after waking up and getting dressed: find somewhere to buy AA batteries so the machines work.

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Ah here we go…

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