Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

December 7th, 2013

FUCK YOU AND YOUR JUNIPER BERRIES.

via Janetter for Mac

shiftkey “please call to find out what your options are”
*calls*
“please visit the website”
*ends call*

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 11:31 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

Pschoooooooowwwwww!

via Janetter for Mac

Vice_Is_Hip How a drunk George Lucas invested $120,000,000 into a live action Parapa The Rapper movie that nobody will ever see

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 11:25 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

biorhythmist How can I tell if I have bitcoins? WebMD is no help.

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 11:18 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

All news stories of the form “They 3D printed an X!” are bullshit for all values of X. Pass it on.

via Janetter for Mac

DAaronovitch The entire Labour Party is on my timeline posting photos of themselves grinning at shopkeepers. The cumulative effect is unsettling.

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 11:16 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

So, you “people”, read this rohanharris.net/?p=447 and then this rohanharris.net/?p=454 and then tell @expectproblems that you love him.

via Janetter for Mac

VEVO suggests I follow Nick Cave’s “Into My Arms” with a Justin Bieber song. Which is the obvious next step beyond Cave death ballad.

via Janetter for Mac

There’s the end of linear time right there.

via Janetter for Mac

@SnarkyPlatypus @NewtonMark Does Amex know your phone number? I believe they also have access to location (phone/airline) and other data.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

Were the three women consecutively or simultaneously?

via Janetter for Mac

Yeah look about the cheese…

via Janetter for Mac

Relegated to a menial role. :(

via Janetter for Mac

I had almost forgotten how awesome Danger 5 is. But not completely.

via Janetter for Mac

@NewtonMark @swearyanthony Couldn’t we all, Sir! Our self-control is the only thing that keeps the planet safe.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to NewtonMark

franksting OH: “I love masturbating a big prawn”

via Tweetbot for iOS (retweeted on 9:25 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

“My God, there are Nazis in the walls!”

via Janetter for Mac

dannolan Maritime scurvy solution OBTAINED RT @UberFacts: Semen contains the same amount of Vitamin C as an orange.

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 8:49 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

This question? twitpic.com/di6l70 Shrimp. No wait, the other one.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @UberFacts: Shrimp is referred to as an abomination 4 times more than homosexuality in the bible. [Well, look at what’s in supermarkets.]

via Janetter for Mac

@swearyanthony Yes, I believe P T Barnum covered off this issue some years ago…

via Janetter for Mac in reply to swearyanthony

dannolan I ate too much chicken :(

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 8:34 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

@NicholasFryer Everyone else took down those signs a decade ago.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to NicholasFryer

Bruce Schneier facts are now available on t-shirts. zerodayclothing.com/schneierfacts.…

via Janetter for Mac

baxters Spongebob meets the Christ. It’s quite Xmasy really. :-) pic.twitter.com/CiOTsfrAYG

via iOS (retweeted on 8:28 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

These TPP “negotiations” will end up making Yalta look like an Oprah giveaway session.

via Janetter for Mac

@swearyanthony @NewtonMark I forgot to say, this Bitcoin rig scam is truly glorious, as is the greed of the prospective Bitcoiner.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to swearyanthony

@ikostar @CheekyGhostApps I congratulate you for inventing “sphincter memory”. It’s a handy concept.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to ikostar

I really don’t want to stoke the “Bob ‘I shared 3 women with Turnbull’ Ellis” fires, but it’s fuckin’ irresistible. ellistabletalk.com/2013/12/07/abb…

via Janetter for Mac

marxculture Just written a browser extension to block blinkered entitlement. Can’t tell if working or Internet down

via Twitter for iPad (retweeted on 7:22 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

Having re-examined the gin bottle, I now understand the witness’ earlier comment about free-pouring.

via Janetter for Mac

@adm_76 @SpaghettiOs @Asher_Wolf The image is a cheerful anthropomorphised SpaghettiO, with a big smile, waving a US flag.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to adm_76

franksting I should put on some pants

via YoruFukurou (retweeted on 7:05 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

RT @SpaghettiOs: Take a moment to remember with us. pic.twitter.com/p6UoNm0Oue [What the actual fuck?]

via Janetter for Mac

@Asher_Wolf @GuardianAus @hannahcommodore Well, Vixen B “incident” wasn’t an “accident”, the plutonium spew was the point of the test.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to Asher_Wolf

@dufussy Oh yes, so it is. So basically mud with a bit of acid (sulphuric?) added. That’s fairly easy to deal with, IIRC.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to dufussy

A variety of weapons made from things bought in an airport AFTER you’ve been through security screening. terminalcornucopia.com

via Janetter for Mac

None that I’m aware of.

via Janetter for Mac

So that RT basically is about mainstream news pointing out that they completely failed to inform their own audience of matters of interest.

via Janetter for Mac

duncanriley Ppl on the news saying “well digital TV is very confusing,”..”we didn’t know about analogue switch off”… meanwhile in news from a cave…

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 6:22 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

Is there a single mainstream journalist in Australia who passed Year 11 physics or chemistry? Let alone anything more?

via Janetter for Mac

It’s not COMPLETELY necessary that you file your brain under “algae” as soon as the n-word “nuclear” is mentioned.

via Janetter for Mac

Consider, dear Media, the Vixen B tests in comparison with some bloody mine tailings. Fucktards. theconversation.com/dig-for-secret…

via Janetter for Mac

Dear Media, a group with no nuclear expertise saying “one of the worst nuclear incidents” is not “this is the worst nuclear incident”.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @nigelcameron: Okey dokey. “You don’t have permission to access “healthcare.gov” on this server.” [So that’s all fixed too!]

via Janetter for Mac

“Martians yet to retaliate after Curiosity’s 100,000th laser strike. Looks like we got them outgunned!” by @ssharwood theregister.co.uk/2013/12/06/cur…

via Janetter for Mac

I have been left alone in charge of the gin and the cheese. So nothing could go wrong, basically.

via Janetter for Mac

Durf “In a video game, there’d definitely be something hidden in this wall.” pic.twitter.com/i70eXUuJuM (via @tatthiy)

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 5:22 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

CarmelTaylor2 I wonder why they call it a pic.twitter.com/XgByckKgG0

via Tweetbot for iOS (retweeted on 5:08 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

Video: “The last horse fishermen of Belgium” youtube.com/watch?v=ZT7WBt… HT @jonseymour

via Janetter for Mac

@gattaca This would explain several things…

via Janetter for Mac in reply to gattaca

“Belgian horseback shrimp fishing”, which is a thing, is now protected by UNESCO. sbs.com.au/news/article/2…

via Janetter for Mac

glengyron A lot of modern media normalizes human on zombie violence.

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 4:22 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

SnarkyPlatypus Something about the English cricket team getting gay married in the group of death.

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 3:52 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

RT @coliwilso @stilgherrian hey, thanks for retweeting that princess story link, best read so far today! [Hey thank @expectproblems!]

via Plume for Android in reply to coliwilso

Drugs organised, finally.

via Plume for Android

bitcoin_txt The bitcoin bubble is to currency freedom as the Sandy Hook shooting was to firearms freedom.

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 2:07 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

expectproblems She’s a product of lots of the parts of society that I hate, her long term goals involve a boob job, and I want to see her fight a dragon.

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 2:06 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

expectproblems I wanted to take a broken, fucked up, drug-addled, angry young woman and have idiotic fairy tale characters try to turn her into a princess.

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 2:06 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

expectproblems My fairy story involves a waitress, dragons, castles, quests, machine guns, illegal narcotics, murder and euthenasia. Also, an Xbox.

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 2:06 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

expectproblems I got angry and wrote a fucking fairytale. Please share if you like it. rohanharris.net/?p=447

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 2:06 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

Being quite a lot less patient.

via Tweetbot for iOS

Being slightly less patient.

via Tweetbot for iOS

Sam_152 OH: If you get out of an Apache configuration file in less than 2 hours, you’re practically a genius.

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 1:22 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

I want my drugs. And gin.

via Tweetbot for iOS

DrPeterThraft Blue semen very often indicates a more serious problem.

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 12:56 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

@jeffsonstein I wouldn’t be surprised if we were doing a good-cop bad-cop double act.

via Tweetbot for iOS in reply to jeffsonstein

“China and Australia dispute over East China Sea escalates”, so there’s that. tinyurl.com/lpafchg

via iOS

Note to self: Poker machines in hospital waiting rooms, a business waiting to happen.

via Tweetbot for iOS

WHERE ARE MY DRUGS?

via Tweetbot for iOS

“Still ahead: Dr Oz’s Underwear Test: 5 questions that will determine your health.”

via Tweetbot for iOS

semibogan Satoshi is Kenny Loggins

via TweetCaster for Android (retweeted on 12:13 PM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

gattaca Fuming at a security company for not having SSL on their corp site is odd. Do we have armed guards protecting tourist pamphlets in a hotel?

via Tweetbot for iOS (retweeted on 11:57 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

BernardKeane with any luck @NewtonMark PVO will do an hysterical “Leave Peta Credlin ALONE” rant on Youtube

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 11:55 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

Vice_Is_Hip “It’s like Drive meets Jaws” - How the Ecuadorian government crowdfunded the most confusing film of 2014

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 11:55 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Tweetbot for iOS)

@ssharwood Oh yes, fun for all the family there.

via Tweetbot for iOS in reply to ssharwood

@ssharwood It most certainly is. One of the narrow EFTPOS-only machines, in fact.

via Tweetbot for iOS in reply to ssharwood

@indigoid Yep, it appears that CityRail EFTPOS ticket machines run Windows XP. So nothing can go wrong there.

via Plume for Android in reply to indigoid

mappingbabel Quick reminder that if you put pictures on Flickr etc bots are probably scraping them and auto-identifying brands theregister.co.uk/2013/12/06/bra…

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 10:07 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

“A Charity Donation was made to you. Contact Russo A Large through his email:russolarge@ca.rr.com”? FFS, at least TRY, people!

via Janetter for Mac

NickRossTech Shout out to the guys at Atomic with their 24-hour charity gaming marathon in aid of the -> ow.ly/28CcaW

via Hootsuite (retweeted on 9:56 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

OH: “Just get to the tazing part!”

via Janetter for Mac

“Bitcoiners rally around a Freeman’s right to not be enslaved by the state to pay his speeding ticket” buttcoin.org/bitcoiners-ral… HT @19bk69

via Janetter for Mac

@juhasaarinen @sylmobile Oh I have already seen the thing that @jeremybank posted, and blame @marcfennell.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to juhasaarinen

What? George Gordon Byron, 6th Baron Byron, later George Gordon Noel, 6th Baron Byron, FRS? Well FFS that’s… creepy.

via Janetter for Mac

Why do I keep ending up in these situations?

via Janetter for Mac

I’m pretty sure arse-candling is not an actual thing.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @GrogsGamut: Bryan Singer announces ‘X-Men: Apocalypse’ will hit theaters in 2016 po.st/pBUgLi via @HitFix [Not Brian Mannix?]

via Janetter for Mac

So glad I’m surrounded by wipeable surfaces right now.

via Janetter for Mac

altmed_txt Pictured above is my cat, Bradley. He is also a Grass-Fed Anarchist.

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 8:47 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

RT @alexismadrigal: Have you seen our tulip-bitcoin live exchange rate calculator? theatlantic.com/technology/arc… [I have. Society is now complete.]

via Janetter for Mac

I’d suggest pinning a sprig of wattle on all these arsehats and shoving them into the lake but, you know, Dr Duncan and “sensibilities”.

via Janetter for Mac

If you think the air pollution has been bad in Shanghai this week, just break out the smug meters in Canberra today.

via Janetter for Mac

Apparently today people can “express their love”. IT’S AS IF HALLMARK AND TARGET-BRAND 5-PACKS OF SOCKS NEVER EXISTED. ARSEHATS.

via Janetter for Mac

Lavender ties. Just what is wrong with these people?

via Janetter for Mac

ACT legalises marriage for smug, middle-class men who wear lavender ties after dark. @abcnews pic.twitter.com/jyIOGeiizh

via Janetter for Mac

expectproblems Today, I’m going to write a fucking story, because I’m fucking pissed off. It’s going to have magic and wizards and shit in it.

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 8:12 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

guardian Picture of the day: a seal swimming down the A149 in Norfolk gu.com/p/3y2he/tw pic.twitter.com/TLedbnMXqN

via Hootsuite (retweeted on 8:01 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Plume for Android)

“Microsoft: US government is an ‘advanced persistent threat’”, writes @violetblue. Feel free to add your own joke. zdnet.com/microsoft-us-g…

via Plume for Android

“Governments planning to control [information] security tech exports”, writes @lseltzer zdnet.com/governments-pl…

via Plume for Android

Sat plan, draft: Struggle to get out of bed; obtain medication ; abandon any further pretence of structure and order.

via Plume for Android

Me at @zdnetaustralia yesterday: “Bitcoin: It’s not just loopy tulip land, it’s worse” zdnet.com/bitcoin-its-no…

via Plume for Android

@Captainturtle @mattdasilva This is the precise issue in a nutshell, Captain. We must have clearly defined categories.

via Plume for Android in reply to Captainturtle

Saturday, sort of. I object in principle.

via Plume for Android

Every newsroom should have a working speargun to deal with that sort of bullshit, as @GuardianAus should know.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @GuardianAus: Tolkien gesture – scientist maps climate of Lord of the Ringbit.ly/1gJQQz0D7 [Whoever did that pun, kill them.]

via Janetter for Mac

Me at @zdnetaustralia: “Bitcoin: It’s not just loopy tulip land, it’s worse” zdnet.com/bitcoin-its-no…

via Janetter for Mac

Actually, no, one last pimp of this week’s column…

via Janetter for Mac

Have I offended enough people today? Can I go to bed now?

via Janetter for Mac

thegrugq If you’ve got nothing to hide then fuck it, lets all sit around have Self Criticism sessions using open surveillance data.

via Tweetbot for iOS (retweeted on 12:50 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

timfdavis @stilgherrian hmm not sure if i trust the widgets data aqicn.org/city/shanghai/

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 12:37 AM, Dec 7th, 2013 via Janetter for Mac)

So in Shanghai the SO2 figure is 103? pic.twitter.com/TveScs4gty HT @timfdavis Is that PPM? Because read this! ccohs.ca/oshanswers/che…

via Janetter for Mac

Is there someone I can stab in the face about now?

via Janetter for Mac

Sometimes, and in fact all too frequently, nuclear weapons are actually how you should just start the “dialog”.

via Janetter for Mac

@milto117 Oh fuck off, you patronising little cunt. Address the arguments posed or GTFO.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to milto117