Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

December 21st, 2015

hannahcommodore Internet hole pic.twitter.com/ZPSBKj4F9i

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 8:48 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

“STAR WARS: A Bad Lip Reading” youtube.com/watch?v=1w8Z0U…

via TweetDeck

“Britain Explodes Atom Bomb” (1952) youtube.com/watch?v=MUTS-6…

via TweetDeck

NickatFP Americans’ current terror level at something like orange pic.twitter.com/Sz3SlTcFZ1

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 6:19 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Wait. It’s only 1740 AEDT?

via TweetDeck

paulkidd All the trigger warnings. pic.twitter.com/P43yc3QaTI

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 5:27 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via Tweetbot for iΟS)

@RealNickHodge Look, the emu was obviously lonely, and they’re not the brightest crayons in the box.

via Tweetbot for iΟS in reply to RealNickHodge

This reminds me of when I had to… I mean the emu… Um… Look, I’ll tell you another time.

via Tweetbot for iΟS

Well I must say, “emu semen” isn’t a phrase I expected to hear today. Or a thing I expected to see. So there’s that.

via Tweetbot for iΟS

“I just came here to take photos of goats, and there’s an emu having sex with my camera bag.” twitter.com/RealNickHodge/…

via Tweetbot for iΟS

People should stop calling it comfort food and face up to the fact that it’s sulk food. Food for sulking.

via Tweetbot for iΟS

Oh. It is rainier than I thought, and I am sulkier than I thought, so I just got some unhealthy things from the corner shop.

via Tweetbot for iΟS

I might go for a wander and see what I can discover to eat.

via TweetDeck

@CatfishStory @SnarkyPlatypus Let’s cheer ourselves up by burning down some public building or other.

via TweetDeck in reply to CatfishStory

Well today has been utterly unproductive. What a win.

via TweetDeck

WarWraith It’s only a small change, but I think it’s far more accurate now..pic.twitter.com/EODTV5MoB5B5

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 4:23 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

humphriesmark There are beautiful chocolate names like Ferrero Rocher, and then there’s… pic.twitter.com/KnfYulVdjx

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 4:22 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Gawd, you can’t even wander down to the servo for milk and fags any more. twitter.com/cosmicpinot/st…

via TweetDeck

jeamland WOW!!!!! pic.twitter.com/DnS36drc1x

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 4:14 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

joshgnosis I missed this on Friday: the PM just really likes tea. pic.twitter.com/E8pHAeUwaq

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 4:13 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@werefox08 @banas51 This will have to remain one of life’s little mysteries.

via TweetDeck in reply to werefox08

@werefox08 @banas51 Oh you’re yearning for a hug. You need to feel the warmth of someone’s arms around you. And a biscuit it always good.

via TweetDeck in reply to werefox08

@jdub Pish tosh! Live a little!

via TweetDeck in reply to jdub

@werefox08 @banas51 Would you like a hug? It sounds like you would like a hug. Or maybe a biscuit first?

via TweetDeck in reply to werefox08

@rosieryan @ConnorParker That would make sense. I can’t be bothered trawling back through the images just now. The humidity is killing me.

via TweetDeck in reply to rosieryan

Dear Media Reporters, @ConnorParker and I need to know why @theage added in a welder. theage.com.au/comment/rankin… pic.twitter.com/Vq9Kh8il0N

via TweetDeck

Apparently no-one has ever noticed that humans anthropomorphise non-human things until just now.

via TweetDeck

I was about to say “Where the fuck is this rain”, but I’ve found it. pic.twitter.com/tWwKHW02nH

via Twitter for iPhone

So in summary, @ConnorParker @AOCarr, I have solved your mystery but opened another.

via TweetDeck

… and in this Fairfax story, under the same credit, Rob Young, but no welder to be seensmh.com.au/national/educa…Gpic.twitter.com/BFxUt8L6xvxv

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… leads me to discover this image on a number of news stories elsewhere..@ConnorParkere@AOCarrrpic.twitter.com/mtccrf7zXaXa

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heyschoolgirl What a steal! pic.twitter.com/WaOImw6ALp

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 2:58 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@SnarkyPlatypus Yep, Apex clubs, and at that time they were strong in Gawler and the Barossa Valley.

via TweetDeck in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

Earlier I should have said “an evergreen” not “a evergreen”. Sorry, everyone.

via TweetDeck

rpy the light rail operator examines patronage numbers after the Opal travel reward loophole is removed pic.twitter.com/fOwanhbRo6

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 2:44 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@SnarkyPlatypus Why do you remember this? Also, I’m sure they did, they have much community spirit.

via TweetDeck in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

@NicholasFryer Your earlier message was understood complete.

via TweetDeck

@RealNickHodge Excellent. Everything is going to plan.

via TweetDeck in reply to RealNickHodge

ajobbins The AC is dead in Target Highpoint and chocolate Darth Vader has melted in the heat pic.twitter.com/E1u9TjWlD4

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 2:20 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

QueerDiscOx I love how Hermione being black is somehow more implausible to some people than a universe where the entire postal system depends on owls

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 2:16 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Deciduous what I did there? Huh? Huh? twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…

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Yeah, @JazzTwemlow is right. A movie like this would be a evergreen. twitter.com/JazzTwemlow/st…

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People who want it all to make sense.

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TheFix Just an amazing quote. twitter.com/rickklein/stat…

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 2:00 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

semibogan FOR FUCK SAKE. twitter.com/SingletaryM/st…

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 12:55 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@k8alexandra @mpesce Should anyone need another party at this time of year… ;)

via TweetDeck in reply to k8alexandra

@0x1C Sounds a bit Muslim to me. Can he be trusted?

via TweetDeck in reply to 0x1C

Note to self: Those constant hand gestures must’ve been the “signals desire” part. twitter.com/Mumbrellanews/…

via TweetDeck

@k8alexandra @mpesce Solstice isn’t until 1548 AEDT tomorrow.

via TweetDeck in reply to k8alexandra

jeffsonstein Mom has done a good job twitter.com/jennspiller/st…

via Twitter for iPad (retweeted on 12:43 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Just reviewing my Twitter mute filters. These all stay. instagram.com/p/_iSF_viFsv/

via Instagram

@BXGD Perhaps, but Fred Nile MLC is a special case. I couldn’t fit suitably comprehensive bile into a single tweet.

via TweetDeck in reply to BXGD

@Freed0m_machine That’s it, is it? That’s the depth of your understanding? God, how pathetic.

via TweetDeck in reply to Freed0m_machine

rainbowrowell Also my mom saw Star Wars. “The best part was that little old lady who looked like a tangerine. The whole movie should have been about her.”

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 12:13 PM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

What an odd coincidence. The people who reckon they know the “truth” about Islam are all tedious old white bigots. twitter.com/frednile/statu…

via TweetDeck

In NSW it’s only illegal to leave a kid unattended in a motor vehicle. slatergordon.com.au/blog/unattende… Refrigerators, ovens, little cages, all good.

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@jeffsonstein @Asher_Wolf This is clearly a looming child safety issue.

via TweetDeck in reply to jeffsonstein

@Asher_Wolf Well, we’ve got a generation of resilient people on the way, eh?

via TweetDeck in reply to Asher_Wolf

SBS2 Mike Baird Admits He Was Inside The Costume: sbs.com.au/comedy/article… @SBSComedy pic.twitter.com/xTObyzhMHc

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 11:57 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Mashing my face into the desk repeatedly, as per @firstdogonmoon’s helpful diagram. pic.twitter.com/Dgx70L23Ge

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So I have been waiting for the cleaners to arrive at the new time of “1100”, having failed to see the second word in the message, “Tuesday”.

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@AbstractCode So what you’re saying is that they were terrible teachers. Got it.

via TweetDeck in reply to AbstractCode

@AbstractCode No, tell me more about your parents.

via TweetDeck in reply to AbstractCode

“Parents been ‘lectured’ by police for letting their children walk to the shops or catch a bus on their own” (2012) smh.com.au/nsw/police-thr…

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“How children lost the right to roam in four generations” (2007). Radius of action down from 6 miles to 300 yards. dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4…

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Were parents always such gullible paranoid dipshits?

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giphz pic.twitter.com/F1XFdENp2o

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 11:40 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

C_NyaKundiH A farmer in Uttar Pradesh released 3 sacks full of 40 snakes in a gvt office after the officials asked for bribe. pic.twitter.com/TIeNb83bEg

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 11:38 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

FFS, parents, you do remember that your kids can even talk to each other without using the internet at all? MY GOD THEY COULD SAY ANYTHING.

via TweetDeck

Where “safe place” is defined at “a place were what humans say to each other is monitored constantly”. twitter.com/Idealaw/status…

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rohan_p SMH story related to the IGIS report: Australia’s bungling spies dialled wrong numbers and bugged wrong phones smh.com.au/national/wrong…

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 11:31 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@hughstephens @rpy I asked Opal if they had plans to make CSV files available, but no, they can only do PDFs of your statements. Arsehats.

via TweetDeck in reply to hughstephens

LiveTrafficNSW MACKSVILLE: Heavy holiday traffic northbound on the . 2km queue. Allow additional travel time and

via Hootsuite (retweeted on 11:27 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

thegrugq Juniper’s source code review process. pic.twitter.com/a92lDsC3f3

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 11:26 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Right. So let’s make Opal even more difficult to understand. “Just trust us, and we’ll deduct the right money.” twitter.com/rpy/status/678…

via TweetDeck

rohan_p Quite disturbing (from the Inspector-General of Intelligence and Security annual report igis.gov.au/node/7 ) pic.twitter.com/NVIvZ911HM

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 11:21 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

thegrugq There will be cyber.

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 11:20 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

A nice new gig for @unsungsongs, this. Congratulations, Sir! artshub.com.au/news-article/n…

via TweetDeck

No, not a world first. Politician have been incredibly stupid in the past too. twitter.com/jondonnisonbbc…

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@evcricket Virtual Assistants already exist as a thing, but these one-offs are an Airtasker / TaskRabbit thing already?

via TweetDeck in reply to evcricket

@scott_thewspot This is not the same thing. My card got breached; the Bad Guys were trying to rack up PSN transactions.

via TweetDeck in reply to scott_thewspot

blowdart “I took some ketamine stolen from a vet and I didn’t get the right high. Can I sue?” Oh Reddit. reddit.com/r/legaladvice/…

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 10:52 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@DDsD @ABCNews24 I can’t answer that. It’s a call-back to a line from The Thick of It.

via TweetDeck in reply to DDsD

@BXGD Bit of a long bow, that. It’s a comment on TV presentation technique that I’d hit a man with just as hard.

via TweetDeck in reply to BXGD

AAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!1!@!

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“… as opposed to sticking coat-hanger wire in my ears and forgetting everything.” Good plan, Ms Guthrie. J’approvetwitter.com/nicchristensen…dS

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Watching the new ABC managing director Michelle Guthrie on @ABCNews24 right now. She needs to stop the constant invisible-boobs gesture.

via TweetDeck

SethBoster_Star Star Wars spoilers threatened in the newsroom. @TLockette_Star steps in: “This is where free speech ends.” @OHnewsroom

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 10:34 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@danilic @R_Chirgwin It might be safer, or at least more gentle, to start with the Edict tomorrow, with the Public House Forum #2 episode.

via TweetDeck in reply to danilic

@danilic @R_Chirgwin Corrupted Nerds should ramp up again soon. corruptednerds.com The 9pm Edict is just wrong. stilgherrian.com/category/edict/

via TweetDeck in reply to danilic

@danilic @R_Chirgwin Through some oversight by the authorities, I have two podcasts. Something should be done.

via TweetDeck in reply to danilic

joshgnosis Happy third anniversary for that time @dannolan got yelled at by PJK. theaustralian.com.au/opinion/strewt…

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 10:01 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

I gather from the news that a car salesman did something atrocious. Wow.

via TweetDeck

@R_Chirgwin No Richard. @danilic is already well aware of me.

via TweetDeck in reply to R_Chirgwin

@intelwire True. Now I’m trying to work out what word to use instead of “secret”. Having trouble.

via TweetDeck in reply to intelwire

Maybe I should just start drinking now and avoid the rush.

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“Secret hashtag”. Let’s just think that through, shall we? twitter.com/intelwire/stat…

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Wow, this is a tough one. How long have I got until I have to lock in my answer? twitter.com/RollingStone/s…

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I’m not sure that so-called “lexicographer” @bgzimmer understands how linguistics works any more. twitter.com/bgzimmer/statu…

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Right, well, having kicked off the working week with a hearty round of card fraud, I will now have a shower and shave and try to start work.

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Thankfully, Westpac has cardless withdrawals from ATMs using their app and SMS auth codes, so I can get that happening. YAY FOR THE FUTURE.

via TweetDeck

@MatthewBevan Indeed there was. “Hit” also works, and is two syllables shorter. Nice try, mate. :P

via TweetDeck in reply to MatthewBevan

@ChazFH I use neither of those things That’s not where the problem lay.

via TweetDeck in reply to ChazFH

@mccartm1 Yeah, this is where I’m sulking a bit, because this is a debit card, and also the only account that I have.

via TweetDeck in reply to mccartm1

@SnarkyPlatypus Indeed. This is why card details alone aren’t worth much on the black market any more.

via TweetDeck in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

“Impacted”, @MatthewBevan? FFS! They “hit” the wall. “Smashed” the wall. “Buggered up” thew all. twitter.com/MatthewBevan/s…

via TweetDeck

Mind you, in that time, there were four transactions out to PSN, each for $104.85. I’d like that back before the holidays.

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First potential bad transaction detected at 0823. All dealt with and off the phone by 0828. Elapsed time 25 minutes.

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The Westpac fraud team person says they’ve been seeing a lot of fraudulent transactions out to the Playstation Network recently. Gamers, eh?

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@Westpac Thanks, Niki, the call is done, and now I just have to hope you can get this sorted before Christmas Eve. Have a good one.

via TweetDeck in reply to Westpac

So, nominally five working days to get a replacement card, it’s a 4-day week, and the post is clogged with Christmas. SUCH WIN.

via TweetDeck

Yep, my @Westpac card is compromised. A whole series of transactions out to the Playstation Network. Talking to fraud control now.

via TweetDeck

alpaca4Sale Lois is a very special alpaca. $2300 pic.twitter.com/ClFkiARQca

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 8:28 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@Westpac Hi, is the mobile number ending 739 sending me card fraud alerts genuinely yours?

via TweetDeck

Though I’m still rather proud of Cocaine Cockatoo.

via TweetDeck

Yes, in further Stoner Sloth fail, no-one involved in the NSW campaign seems to have looked on the internet first. twitter.com/danilic/status…

via TweetDeck

danilic Will be speaking with the owner of medical marijuana vendor StonerSloth. Com later on this hour on @702sydney pic.twitter.com/zqvKjFDFDK

via Fenix for Android (retweeted on 8:16 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

BernardKeane Proud to have been able to draw attention to this crisis. twitter.com/currentlyUK/st…

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 8:15 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@loupascale @mumbrella She grabbed a frisbee off the shelf, “Here, would you like a frisbee to play with?” And the creatives scampered off.

via TweetDeck in reply to loupascale

@loupascale @mumbrella I had a major ad agency as a client once, meetings with the IT manager kept being interrupted by creatives…

via TweetDeck in reply to loupascale

bernietb “Resiliance; determination; an even keel; and drinking my own piss” twitter.com/johnccmay/stat…

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 8:00 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@loupascale Saatchi & Saatchi, I’m told. And agreed about the award-chasing. @mumbrella has written on this quite a bit.

via TweetDeck in reply to loupascale

jayrosen_nyu “Column” is when you give your personal opinion. “Analysis” is when you give your professional peer group’s opinion. twitter.com/CharlieHavilan…

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 7:54 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@loupascale Well, in most cases, the aim is to tell Laura Norder voters that the govt is “taking action”, not to actually help anyone.

via TweetDeck in reply to loupascale

Well I would take up this offer immediately, and reach for the waxer. twitter.com/Idealaw/status…

via TweetDeck

fifimadrid I asked this man what drove him to come to PP HQ and he said: “I sell flags” pic.twitter.com/2DYh1Wfth6

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 7:50 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Still, if we didn’t govern by listening to the expertise of bitter, ignorant old men on talkback radio, how would we govern? It’s a puzzle.

via TweetDeck

The public health goal gets forgotten, and the sociological knowledge of those who work in public health gets ignored. (2/2)

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This is the idiocy that emerges when politicians want to “send a message” and ad agencies get “creative”. (1/2) twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…

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“Stoner Sloth is a bizarre campaign that misses the main target in the war on drugs”, writes @venessb smh.com.au/comment/stoner…

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“But it would be in all our interests…” Haha yeah like this will happen@GrogsGamututtheguardian.com/business/grogo…Ypic.twitter.com/9YQkxNd0kvkv

via TweetDeck

C_and_H pic.twitter.com/ftScFDV2Zd

via Buffer (retweeted on 7:12 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

That spa bath doesn’t look very comfortable. twitter.com/BreakfastNews/…

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Huh? What would Voltaren Viper actually do? Ache slightly less than previously? twitter.com/bubbiting/stat…

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USE PROPER PUNCTUATION OR I WILL HIT YOU.

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I love how people work under the assumption that ad agencies know what they’re doing.

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Mon plan, draft: Progress the weekly plan in various ways, details TBA. stilgherrian.com/weekly-wrap/28…

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OK, I’m bored with all that now.

via TweetDeck

alexkidman @stilgherrian How about Quaalude Quokka? Or the not-quite-as-effective-as-advertised Nurofen Numbat?

via Twitter for Mac (retweeted on 6:56 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Just quietly, I think Cocaine Cockatoo would be a hoot to hang around with. They’re crazy to start with.

via TweetDeck

beejeebus @stilgherrian Jungle Juice Jabba pic.twitter.com/U6DcQId0ex

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 6:54 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

R_Chirgwin @stilgherrian Potaroo

via YoruFukurou (retweeted on 6:54 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

JaneAlcorn @dikkii @stilgherrian Nicotine nightingale.

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 6:54 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

BonnieWildie @stilgherrian Kiddies will bloody love the Adventures of Pinger Python and High Horse.

via Twitter for Mac (retweeted on 6:53 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

terry_legg @stilgherrian @no_filter_Yamba Laughing Gas Jackass

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 6:53 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

I should’ve hashtagged this shit.

via TweetDeck

JaneAlcorn @astudentnow @stilgherrian @leslienassar Alcohol alligator.

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 6:53 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

alexkidman @stilgherrian He’s not as motivated as the others, but don’t forget Wacky Tobaccy Wombat!

via Twitter for Mac (retweeted on 6:52 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

dikkii @stilgherrian armed robbery armadillo.

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 6:52 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Chilp @stilgherrian Speed Snake it is then ;-)

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 6:52 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

astudentnow @leslienassar @stilgherrian Codeine Crocodile

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 6:51 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

bubbiting @stilgherrian Heroin Horse

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 6:51 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

leslienassar Oxy, the Blue-Ringed, Blue-Lipped, Overdosing Octopus twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 6:49 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Yeah, the kiddies would love Ritalin Roo. twitter.com/GordyPls/statu…

via TweetDeck

GordyPls @stilgherrian the Ice Ibis and the Ritalin Roo

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 6:47 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

SnarkyPlatypus @stilgherrian Pinger Platypus?

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 6:47 AM, Dec 21st, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@Chilp What sort of animal, though? It has to be an animal.

via TweetDeck in reply to Chilp

Who’s your favourite superhero?
Ketamine Koala.
Cocaine Cockatoo.
Stoner Sloth.
Eccie Echidna.
Who else?

via TweetDeck

Monday. Push it all the way in, until you hear a click. Monday.

via TweetDeck