Boost’s (Nameless) Reply

Boost Juice Bars has replied to my complaint that I’m annoyed by being asked for my name. All very polite — but the irony is, the writer hasn’t revealed their name.

Dear Stil,

Thank you for your email.

Everyone at Boost works really hard to create a great all round experience for all customers who step into one of our stores. From the brightly coloured store layout, to the music, to the staff who have fun and enjoy what they do, we really do like to live our motto ‘Love Life’.

Asking people for their name is just one part of this. We rarely receive negative feedback regarding this procedure and more often our customers are appreciative that they are not asked to take a ticket and wait for their assigned number to be called. If you wish to call yourself Amanda, or any other name for that matter please feel absolutely free to do so! What we want most is simply to get the freshest, most delicious, made-while-you-wait juice into your hand promptly and efficiently. And, of course, to serve it to you with a smile!

Thanks again for your letting us know your thoughts as it’s always great to receive customer feedback.

Love Life

Of course the jolly, nameless customer service droid who’s composed this response has missed the point. It’s not that I want to be called Amanda. It’s that I don’t want to be referred to a name at all.

If they were actually “work[ing] really hard to create a great all round experience for all customers,” they’d change their procedures to cope with all customers’ preferences. Instead, they’re saying that most people don’t complain, so the strategy rolls on regardless — while we all have fun and smile and enjoy what we do.

Love life.