Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

October 1st, 2008

@SnarkyPlatypus Excellent. So, the 6-pack of Smirnoff Blacks tonight, rather than the gym? We need to celebrate the downfall of capitalism.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

@ApostrophePong Yes, just one. Northbridge Hotel isn’t appealing. And I have to face SnarkyPlatypus later. Oh. Maybe just TWO more then…

via Twitter Web Client in reply to ApostrophePong

@mpesce Wow 10,000 tweets. Of course I’m catching up fast, and far sillier. You can keep your “Bubbles” Fisher. ;)

via Twitter Web Client in reply to mpesce

@Fush Maybe I should do “Stilgherrian Live” from your farewell drinks tomorrow night. That’d be scary.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to Fush

Listening to The Veronicas’ quasi-sapphic pleasure while watching Fox Sports 186 and logging my billable hours. With a beer (just one).

via Twitter Web Client

@neerav Yes @gapingvoid’s article “How to be Creative” http://is.gd/7rj is a classic. I’ll even forgive his support of Thatcher for that. ;)

via Twitter Web Client in reply to neerav

OK, going off-grid at Northbridge to concentrate on the client’s little “issue”. Try not to make trouble while I’m gone.

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@oliyoung Earlier this year… 2001… it’s all the same in my mind.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to oliyoung

OK, here’s a failing of Telstra NextG: If you take the card out of your computer, the link breaks. ;)

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@oliyoung I believe someone has actually implemented RFC1149 earlier this year. Ping times were… considerable. ;)

via Twitter Web Client in reply to oliyoung

About to arrive North Sydney. I’ll get a cab to Northbridge and see what the connectivity is like along that route. Stand by, Special Ones!

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@oliyoung Ah yes, good ol’ RFC1149! :) You know how to make an old man very happy. Oh, and RFCs too.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to oliyoung

The question will be whether the Ustream client software can cope with clogged pipes for 80 seconds. On the Harbour Bridge now.

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@michaelmeloni Yes, the “Stilgherrian Live” from the moving train will have to come soon, eh? ;)

via Twitter Web Client in reply to michaelmeloni

Wynyard. Again, the pipe reconnected OK, and the ping packet sequence numbers are unbroken. Very impressive, NextG.

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Yes, lost connectivity in the tunnel, auto-reconnected at Town Hall, with some packets having 76,000ms ping times. ;)

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NextG test: Where will the link drop out in the City Loop? Will it auto-reconnect at Town Hall? Stand by.

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I have been lying. I am not on a moving train any more but sitting at Central awaiting a connection to North Sydney. Which is arriving now.

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@smperris “Is the screen big enough for the creepy guy currently lurking behind you to also watch?” What if I AM the creepy guy lurking?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to smperris

OK, note this, people! I tweet about global economics, I get 2 replies. I tweet about watching pr0n, I get a dozen. Where is the balance?

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@mhawkins1970 If choosing between US streaming pr0n and European, I choose European. I think you’d watch the US pr0n on a Greyhound bus.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to mhawkins1970

Is watching streaming pr0n on a moving train wrong?

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Just saw a bloke reading the “Sydney Morning Herald”. Headline: “Fortress Australia”. Apparently we can disconnect our economy. Uhuh.

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Being online with decent bandwidth and a MacBook Pro from a moving train still feels kinda decadent though.

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@neerav I have no idea how long I have the free NextG for. Until an episode of “Stilgherrian Live” goes TOO far? ;)

via Twitter Web Client in reply to neerav

Mobile. Intermittent connectivity for the rest of the day. Well, we’ll see how many tunnels Telstra NextG works in.

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@LacqueredStudio “How’d you like it if I drowned your minions of sheep and goats?” I’d melt in your arms, like Sarah Brightman.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to LacqueredStudio

@michaelmeloni Welcome to Twitter! Beware, I’m prolific. Everyone, Michael writes cool stuff re censorship & moral panic. http://is.gd/3mac

via Twitter Web Client in reply to michaelmeloni

Wed plan (1150? Yeah, it’s been like that): Off to Northbridge client site that’s fallen off the grid; gym & dinner w@SnarkyPlatypusypus.

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@kcarruthers The dog ate your back door, you say? I think I’ve seen that movie. The OFLC refused classification… ;)

via Twitter Web Client in reply to kcarruthers

My last tweet re Dell for now: Anyone got a POSITIVE tale to relate? Not about “cool gadgets” but about Dell providing good, prompt service.

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I haven’t heard anyone use the word “expedite” since WWII in anything other than a Terry Gilliam movie.

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@jasonwryan Thanks for the “Good luck with your Dell Hell” tweet. ;) David in the Aust/NZ team (the only one?) said he’d “expedite” it.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to jasonwryan

@SnarkyPlatypus In this case the client asked for a specific type of Dell monitor. It was about range of inputs. I was given a model number.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

RT @MissRFTC: “Best Tweet shoulda gone to @lonelysandwich. […] As a consolation, I’m giving him a VIP tour of my vagina later.”

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@bigmac Yes, there was a woman in a parked car failing to fill her pipe. I don’t know that my life is “exciting”, I just pay attention.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to bigmac

@cpanczak Thank you, yes, much better. Please swear at me in UPPER CASE more often. ;)

via Twitter Web Client in reply to cpanczak

Emerges. Forgot to say “[exit]” first last night, but then I have trouble when my batteries run out.

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That skanky woman in a parked car completely FAILed to fill her pipe and it’s mull everywhere. Loser.

via Cloudhopper

@misswired @Nickhodge Like Romper Room’s Miss Michelle, I can see you in my Magic Mirror telephone. And I am not impressed.

via Cloudhopper in reply to misswired

I have no battery left in my ‘puter, so I have to go home now. I had to tweet this from my phone.

via Cloudhopper

@mpesce Are you DARING me to turn on the camera NOW?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to mpesce

@michaelmeloni And what are you doing watching Dr Phil anyway?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to michaelmeloni

@michaelmeloni Well that useless little cunt who doesn’t like “cussing” (how 17th Century!) http://tinyurl.com/376ljv can go fuck himself.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to michaelmeloni

ROFL! Someone just unfollowed me. My followed count went down too. So they committed Twittercide (TM @SnarkyPlatypus) just then? Was it me?

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PAY ATTENTION TO ME YOU PACK OF USELESS CUNTS!

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@mpesce Hey! You get to speak at conferences! Apparently you’re “ACCEPTABLE”! Nyer nyer!

via Twitter Web Client in reply to mpesce

@DenubisX If you think my tweets “resolve into a pseudo-coherent storyline” then I want some of what you’re on.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to DenubisX

@ApostrophePong “Industries based in Cowra include a vegetable processing factory…” Wow their tourism promotion is teh awesomez!

via Twitter Web Client in reply to ApostrophePong

I wonder why no-one invites me to speak at conferences.

via Twitter Web Client

@Alex_Manchester Actually I just tweet the same tweet over and over again. Any variation you think you detect is in your own polluted mind.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to Alex_Manchester

Channel Nine is showing images of old people fondling chickens. Srsly. Kerry, they know not what they do!

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Surprise fucking surprise! Dell did not send to email they promised by the close of business. Useless fuckwit arseholes. With tapeworms.

via Twitter Web Client

@ApostrophePong Look at this! RT @agibson: My contribution to the Melbourne International Arts Festival: http://tinyurl.com/4abst7

via Twitter Web Client in reply to ApostrophePong

@thatgrumguy Speaking of inappropriate, when are you in Sydney?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to thatgrumguy

@JonathanPoh If you think THIS is inappropriate, just wait until you meet me in person! Why does the Concourse Bar’s toilet smell of semen?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to jpoh

@barrysaunders Yes, actually, I said “BIGGER DILDO”. Gosh. Wynyard already.

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@Nickhodge I’d be able to sense the quiet desperation if I had a BIGGER DILDO. No. Wait! Do these tweets appear on the Internet?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to NickHodgeMSFT

I’m on a route 202 bus, about to cross Falcon Street. North Sydney? I can tell you all this thanks to Telstra’s NextG network. Blame Sol.

via Twitter Web Client

For those who follow both me and @SnarkyPlatypus, there was a lovely ironic synchronicity just then.

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@josh909 “Anyone caught on the north shore after dark turns into a Pajero-driving soccer mum.” True? Ace! I can sell the Pajero for drugs.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to josh909

Christ Northbridge is a hole! I’m leaving not a minute too soon.

via Cloudhopper

@SnarkyPlatypus Oi! You’re my moral advisor! What should I do RIGHT NOW?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

FAIR WARNING! It is 5pm and I am still on the North Shore.

via Twitter Web Client

By the way, Dell, you useless cunts, you have 30 mins to deliver the promised explanation by email. Or is lying your default business mode?

via Twitter Web Client

@Nickhodge I bow to your far superior knowledge of female mandibles and their deployment.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to NickHodgeMSFT

@greymatter78 And speaking of Friday, what happened to YOU? We found you on the street and you tagged along and then… vanished.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to greymatter78

RT @transnets: Top 10 YouTube Videos of All Time, 2008 Edition http://is.gd/3mD8

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Friday was an odd evening. @kcarruthers said of me and @viveka: “Those two should have never been allowed to meet. They’re like evil twins.”

via Twitter Web Client

@nicster Are you the dangerous woman I had dinner with on Friday?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to nicster

RT @andrewdotnich: “@stilgherrian and if one of the above won’t solve the problem, try two at once…” Who said home schooling doesn’t work?

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There are NO problems in the world which can’t be solved with either a hammer, a gun, a private-school tie or 6 lines of speed.

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@greymatter78 What’s wrong with being “a poor man’s Howard Stern”? He is, it says here, KING OF ALL MEDIA! http://is.gd/3mCR

via Twitter Web Client in reply to greymatter78

@josh909 Yes! The Oxford Tavern in Petersham! Lingerie waitresses, open late, “exotic dancers”, no coach groups. FULL. OF. WIN!

via Twitter Web Client in reply to josh909

@nicster Is there such a thing as an RSL that does NOT have chicken parma on the menu? Isn’t it compulsory?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to nicster

@ApostrophePong Cowra? Next weekend? COWRA? You are so fucking dumped. Oh hang on, I dumped you last night. What was that for again?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to ApostrophePong

@pixel8ted “How does one uninstall stuff from a blackberry pearl?” A hammer. Any size will do.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to pixel8ted

@barrysaunders Actually the more I think about it, the more I simply MUST bring you all the true, erm, beauty of Sydney. Seven Hills FTW!

via Twitter Web Client

@kcarruthers I am the very special voice in your head, and @viveka and @SnarkyPlatypus are my backing singers. We all love you.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to kcarruthers

Maybe I should do mid-afternoon “Stilgherrian Live” from suburban pubs front bars, RSLs and bowling clubs. Talkback + lingerie waitresses.

via Twitter Web Client

@SnarkyPlatypus “We should do the gym before excessive drinking.” Bah! I thought you were a friend. Or at least that other voice in my head.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

Northbridge Hotel delivers a steady series of fat old men in Hawaiian shirts, overly-large shorts, tennis shoes. Joh Bjelke-Petersen lives.

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@lnassar “Jackboots”? Yes, I like the way you think… ;) Jackboots it is!

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I’m gonna have a (late) breakfast at the Blue Fig then figure out the rest of the day from there. eTA 10 MINS.

via Cloudhopper

@misswired Hmmm… And what image should I use to illustrate “employers that block social networking websites”?

via Twitter Web Client in reply to misswired

@wolfcat Well, “Cnut of the Week” is about futilely resisting the tide of change. A rickroll is just plain cnutful. ;)

via Twitter Web Client in reply to wolfcat

RT @NathanaelB: “What goes into an hourly rate?” http://is.gd/3oSd I did a typo in my comment, matey, plz fix kthxbai. ;)

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@richardatdell People tell me you fix things, so you may like to read my unhappy tale re Dell’s “service”. http://is.gd/3oJY

via Twitter Web Client in reply to SocialatDELL

And in case you didn’t get enough of me ranting about Dell’s shoddy customer “service” yesterday, I wrote this: http://is.gd/3oJY

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Nominations open for this week’s “Cnut of the Week”. We already have one! Who do YOU nominate? http://is.gd/3oJM

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@biz Yep, I agree with @Entregreeneur @andrewsayer and others: Election Bar MUST be optional. Great feature, though, pls offer more like it.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to biz