
BBCNewsMagazine ‘Expert’ South African metal thieves make off with 10km of working railway bbc.in/1jP0CWt #NewsfromElsewhere pic.twitter.com/X4PPCksIrI
I’ve had enough Wednesday.

dannolan Lol abc 12 pic.twitter.com/OHELkyOAbq
chrisberg where’s my cake tony - august 27

mrtiedt i.imgur.com/E2HSfRT.gif MT @tobiasziegler: “Corporal punishment has been rejected by many experts…” powerful condemnation there Bill
RT @SnarkyPlatypus: #IgniteSydney - the Passion Pop version of TED. [Smirks.]

Taxi approaching instagram.com/p/qge_RWCFpV/
Again, “Scott Morrison and the Conveniently Comforting Doctrine of Predestination” by @AndrewPStreet is a must-read. kingstribune.com/index.php/week…
Suddenly remember I’ve been up since 0300 or maybe even before, which explains a number of things.
@galendal Wrong word roots.
Curious question that, @OaaSvc, when the government literally turns its citizens’ property into a battleground.
OaaSvc or d) Work out where their malware is sending its data and compromise their system exposing it to the world.
OaaSvc c) Document exactly what was done and publicly expose how they inject malware and what it does.
OaaSvc b) Find out who did it and name them publicly.
OaaSvc a) Congratulate them on “keeping you safe”.
OaaSvc Twitter poll: You find your computer has been compromised by <intelligence agency> under Brandis’s new innocent third party ammendments. 1/5
The word of the moment is “idiolect”.
Solved. [Smirks.]
“Home and Away” is on. That reminds of the time [REDACTED, ALL THE THINGS ARE REDACTED] and it was kinda fun.
And if it’s a crossbow, it’s a “bolt” not an “arrow”. So much for attention to detail.
So much for “last tweet”, apparently. Unreliable turd.
“And a man saved by his laptop from a crossbow attack.” Yeah, this is the stuff we need to know about, @7NewsSydney.
That Jeep TVC is just unadulterated bullshit. Which I suppose properly characterises their target audience.
Maybe I should become a Brony.
Oh look, Harold Scruby is complaining about something.
RT @SnarkyPlatypus: Why not just have a ten minute segment of journalists fellating each other on live television? [I’ve listed some names.]
So some @7NewsSydney stories are strapped “The Australian 50th”, with Seven journos having Oz journos on as talking heads. I see.
Yes, @Skud has written the apology Google+ should have written, had they actually learned. infotrope.net/2014/07/16/mea…
@franksting @Skud Ta. I’ve been a bit busy today to think much about Google+
Beer.
@SnarkyPlatypus Il ya des situations où seulement plein de munitions au standard OTAN est suffisante.

@SnarkyPlatypus Le GAU-17 Minigun est nécessaire. pic.twitter.com/UmbCaaRLH7
@mpesce That’s true. And don’t forget Larry Ellison. One of the holiest of all. (Disclosure: I’ve been to his party pad in San Francisco.)
@SnarkyPlatypus Bonjour. Mon cerveau est une gelée. J’ai besoin de nourriture et de chaleur et d’amour et une arme à feu. Et vous?
@0x1C Well fuck me, you’re right! How could I ever doubt your suggestion?
5at5daily 5at5 number 76: Cool cinemas, the early cool web, modern uncool web, religion, and a special friend for the shower. tinyletter.com/5at5/letters/5…
Thanks for your patience. More formal notification will follow by email before 1800 AEST.
Client websites are largely back up and running now. There’s a few glitches, but we’ll notify the affected people individually.
@dobes Well that certainly adds to the frisson!
@dobes Yeah I know. I should be Attorney-General. I’d cyber the shit out of that thing.
“National Security Legislation Amendment Bill (No. 1) 2014” home page, with more options. parlinfo.aph.gov.au/parlInfo/searc…
RT @FarrellPF: Full text of Brandis’ intelligence reform bill is online now parlinfo.aph.gov.au/parlInfo/searc… [There goes my evening…]
Brandis seems to have democracy backwards. He doesn’t tell us what “The West” will be doing. Us citizens tell him how we want things to be.
@AndrewPStreet @KingsTribune @JaneTribune Thanks for going down that rabbit hole. I’ll include a link in @5at5daily today.
“Scott Morrison and the Conveniently Comforting Doctrine of Predestination”, writes @AndrewPStreet kingstribune.com/index.php/week…
The European Court of Justice is ruling data retention illegal all across Europe. digitalrights.ie/data-retention… (2/2)
“Data retention is ‘the way western nations are going’: Brandis”, writes @joshgnosis zdnet.com/au/data-retent… Except… (1/2)
Stressed. But I can’t do anything until the vendor’s engineer gets back to me. So I might as well whinge about something else.
It’s OK, I’m fairly sure this is a direct message.
@drearyclocks “Silicon Alley:” is the nickname for the New York startup scene.
@0x1C That is the plan, yes, but I can’t randomly move client stuff ‘cos of a feelpinion.
@virag064 Yep, I know about the linker problem, but we just hit a rule syntax problem.
@virag064 It’s a cPanel/CentOS box, and cPanel’s engineer is being excellent, but this configuration is unsupported. Coffee time.
@virag064 Updating an Apache 2.2 install and some custom mod_security rules and causing failures. And next, mod_auth_mysql. Joy.
Annoyed that this annoying technical problem is so annoying.
@semibogan Bah. Cryptographers have caused many CVEs already. Consider it a class action.
In which @firstdogonmoon reports on The Australian’s 50th birthday celebrations. Slightly paraphrased. theguardian.com/commentisfree/…
@natecochrane Electrons spin the other way in the southern hemisphere. And presumably ours have (some) different avionics.
I am finding @tinderfessions far, far too entertaining.
tinderfessions Matched with my stepson on Tinder, family holidays have just got a lot better. #Stepmom. - Julia
tinderfessions Me and my match both loved the Patriots (rare). Mid climax he screamed “for you tom Brady” best sex of my life - Peaches
Yay! The F-35 is flying again. Well, a bit. Not fast. And not a long way over the ocean because, you know, splash. defense.gov/news/newsartic…
SO THIS IS THE WRONGEST THING I HAVE SEEN SO FAR TODAY WHY IS THIS EVEN A THING. lostateminor.com/2014/07/16/wor…
@scottcarson1957 @NuclearAnthro Yes. Yes it is. Also, please don’t let that man near any more nuclear weapons.
@NuclearAnthro Indeed.
But my issue was always that I WAS using my real name and Google’s systems wouldn’t let me enter it. I’m not sure that’s been fixed. (2/2)
Thanks for all the messages to say that Google+ finally dropped its stupid “real names” (or “real to whiteboy engineers”) policy… (1/2)
@NuclearAnthro Generally a daily change, yes. If I can’t be bothered being creative I drop to one of the generic ones on file. Sad.
savagehenry73 1. Put kitten in briefcase.
2. Go to meeting.
3. When kitten starts meowing, say “I have to take this”
4. Talk into kitten like it’s a phone
@NuclearAnthro Thanks. Given that today is the anniversary, it seemed an attractive choice for my avatar of the day.
@gattaca I draw your attention to this modest proposal from @davpope..twitter.com/davpope/status…98

davpope I await the Productivity Commission’s cost-benefit analysis of my #CBR transit plan (via CT goo.gl/oc0BNQ) pic.twitter.com/BoLG4MFTiR
“Soapy QC returns from London and addresses the party room. ‘Me and the guys decided to start smoking bath salts. We’re all doing it.’”
Wed plan, redraft: Fix technical problem; write for @zdnetaustralia; @5at5daily; go somewhere for shopping and dinner; sleep, maybe.
RT @bengrubb: So Opal’s privacy policy isn’t accessible at present. Hmm… [Stop using your Opal cards immediately then.]
Brandis’ “This is the way the West is moving” comment is a rather nasty piece of logic-free persuasion. smh.com.au/federal-politi…
@Andrew_Zammit That’s what I get for reading things straight after returning to consciousness from a blurry nap. Give me a gun.
MT @Andrew_Zammit: Other PJCIS reforms will be proposed today, not data retention, but that data retention might come soon. [Doh!]
Oh well, no shortage of things for me to write about this week.
The same AEC that “lost” more than a thousand votes thanks to bullshit security now reckons it can judge what is and isn’t a hacking risk.
In the one week, the government reckons they must be able to see our every move online, but we can’t see how they count our votes. I see.
“Government blocks AEC source code release on hacking fears”, reports @joshgnosis zdnet.com/au/government-…
Fairfax suggest proposed data retention laws will arrive this week. Today in fact. smh.com.au/federal-politi…
Right.
I feel dreadful.
RT @KevinBankston: Right on: Google finally abandons its G+ real names policy plus.google.com/+AmberYust/pos… [That took stupidly too long.]
Sulking.
Arson, @umairh. Lock everyone in that damn cafe and torch it. It’s the only way to be sure.
umairh “We’re architecting end to end business relationships by leveraging data-driven solutions. Let’s brainstorm!!” - across from me at the cafe
“Mistakes were made.”
LOUDBOT THIS IS AN OPPORTUNITY! STOP BEING SO SHORTSIGHTED AND UNATTRACTIVE
RT @SnarkyPlatypus: Flatmate: My mouth is sore when I eat. Do you think it’s syphilis? [This man so needs his own chat show.]
@jeamland It’s like a penis pump, but completely inside out.
jeamland And kids? If someone comes up to you and offers you thought leadership? Just take drugs.
@darrenpauli Death?
I have escalated it to someone.
@darrenpauli Already onto it. Also, why are you awake?
RT @jeamland: @stilgherrian An Illudium-PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator is what you need. You should totally use one of those. [Yes.]
I am sure I can escalate this to someone.
I love* how when you’re dealing with a problem with X there’ll always be people who help* by telling you “You should be using Y”.
@jeffsonstein @jdub Right now I’m more interested in fixing the immediate problem than “Why don’t they do X?” architecture discussions.
@jdub There’s always someone who whinges when you’re not using their latest hipster thing. ;)
“Recompiling Apache and PHP.” This sentence should not exist in my world. Or anyone’s.
SavedYouAClick Did you know that it’s raining in New York City right now?
Aha. PHP symbol relocation error for libmysqlclient.so, so at least I know what I’m dealing with here. The fix is easy too. Self-lobotomy.
@SnarkyPlatypus Si il existe un moyen d’accélérer le armageddon, je trouve.
Unrelated to what I’m fixing, a machine in Guangdong is trying to get my web server to trust a fake SSL certificate for Wells Fargo Bank.
Right. I need to tackle this problem. If you see a sudden flash of light, just duck and cover. You’ll have six seconds.

guardianworld German sausage cartel caught bangers to rights. It’s a wurst-case scenario etc… gu.com/p/4vxf5/tw pic.twitter.com/ohFOySKu4E
@EnsignR I shan’t ask.
@lelak That’s why we’re all going cyber now. Refrigergeddon FTW!
@SnarkyPlatypus Bonjour. J’ai froid et fatigué et irritable et je suis péter copieusement. Il est merveilleux. Et vous?
@swearyanthony Rails?
@swearyanthony That should also be the name of Mr Hemmes’ next fashionable* bar. Hemmeroid.
@swearyanthony Worse. PHP.
Wed plan, early draft: Fix annoyingly weird PHP library problem; remainder TBA, but there’s plenty to choose from; destroy the Earth.
Since Mistress Insomnia has insisted I be awake before 0330 AEST, I might as well tackle that annoying problem that blipped up overnight.
Happy birthday to the Age of Nuclear Armageddon, born 16 July 1945 and thankfully still with us because we could all use a laugh.
Wednesday. There are parasites of so many kinds in every organ, gnawing away at your very essence. But you are oblivious. Wednesday.