Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

October 30th, 2014

@realist Ah yes, I’d forgotten about that. We’re screwed.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to realist

@jonoabroad Yes it is. It’s perfectly good Norwegian.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to jonoabroad

@humphriesmark Somebody really should have told you it was on.

via Janetter for Mac

sexyma3 Peter Jackson just found a postcard JRR Tolkien wrote his nephew in 1938. He’s turning it into 22 nine-hour films.

via sexyma3 (retweeted on 9:36 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

“Clarke and Dawe - Selections for the Canberra Hack Handicap” youtube.com/watch?v=IEQBiA…

via Janetter for Mac

Just to be clear, Australia’s proposed data retention scheme would not apply to communications using RFC 1149. So use that, not a VPN.

via Janetter for Mac

AndrewBloch Thanks to today’s Daily Mail we now know what a cyber thief looks like so can stay a step ahead…

(via @lukemcgee) pic.twitter.com/EUa21Zd8GU

via Twitter for BlackBerry (retweeted on 9:15 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

@p_np_ Its intent is presumably to pull in anything that can reasonably be called “a communication”, including over-the-top services.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to p_np_

@p_np_ Not quite. It’s part of which services that a “relevant service provider” provides that come under the data retention regime.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to p_np_

@dananimal Either that or a blend of goat shit and turpentine.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to dananimal

“Blue Mountains’ Hydro Majestic hotel rediscovers its former glamour after a $35m restoration”, reports @abcnews abc.net.au/news/2014-10-3…

via Janetter for Mac

I think that’s about as much of the Muskatnøttlovgivning as I can cope with in one sitting.

via Janetter for Mac

netw3rk Because it’s fucking lava RT @BuzzFeedNews: Lava Is About To Engulf A Town In Hawaii, Why Can’t It Be Stopped? pic.twitter.com/oVLdFGVdHa

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 8:59 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

heardatnature “I like a bit of hair on a beetle”

via Hootsuite (retweeted on 8:56 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

@shipw @sylmobile There were clauses after that which set out when an attempt becomes a communication for the purposes of the Act.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to shipw

ISPs have to submit their data retention plans to ACMA, which decides whether they correctly implement requirements. Better than ASIC, tho.

via Janetter for Mac

“an attempt to send a communication by means of a relevant service is taken to be the sending of a communication by means of the service…”

via Janetter for Mac

“(iv) another relevant service relating to a relevant service;”

via Janetter for Mac

“… carrying communications, or enabling communications to be carried, by means of guided or unguided electromagnetic energy or both …”

via Janetter for Mac

I shall now tweet a few choice phrases from our new Nutmeg Law, or Muskatnøttlovgivning. Prepare to be thrilled.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @chrisjrn: @stilgherrian @dobes why stop at nutmeg? [IT’S LIKE A VEIL HAS BEEN LIFTED…]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to chrisjrn

RT @michaelneale: @SnarkyPlatypus @stilgherrian takes a lot of nutmeg to get a buzz. [Yes. Fully one-third of the LD50. Here’s hoping.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to michaelneale

Wondering whether @dobes will let me refer to the Australian Parliament as “a troupe of gibbons high on nutmeg”.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @SnarkyPlatypus: @stilgherrian Gibbons high on nutmeg. [I REMEMBER THAT SITTING OF PARLIAMENT.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

I think I’d successfully suppressed memories of the last time I had to go down this rabbit hole. These laws were drafted by drugged gibbons.

via Janetter for Mac

Modest Proposal #45: Burn down the entire Telecommunications Act 1997 and related legislation and start again. Lawyers, are you with me?

via Janetter for Mac

RT @franksting: If you’re all Leyjonhelm fans today the fucktard in charge must’ve really dropped some weird acid. [I’VE JUST HAD AN IDEA.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to franksting

Sadly the legislation does not use the term “eelectronic web address”. Disappoint.

via Janetter for Mac

@markc @joshgnosis Ah thank you, that was another angle I was going to trawl the legislation for.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to markc

jack_daniel Paraphrased call:
CC fraud guy: We’re sending you a new card because: breach
Me: Which breach?
Him: Like I can keep track of this chaos.

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 8:08 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

JackofKent “In Sweden, it is forbidden by law to be a criminal.” pic.twitter.com/w9bIZYiAeX

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 8:06 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

RT [REDACTED]: “An unmissable Q&A” yeah I will prove you wrong

via Janetter for Mac

RT @domknight: I’m now getting dissed by random UK backpacker hostels. *Sigh* twitter.com/thefortyork/st… [… about ethics in games journalism?]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to domknight

SnarkyPlatypus SUPPRESS ALL THE THINGS

via YoruFukurou (retweeted on 7:58 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

RT @lipporocks: Bandt: my question is to the Minister called the Minister for Environment @SkyNewsAust [Oh well played.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to lipporocks

@semibogan @thegrugq Well sheesh, the solution is obvious. MOAR AND BETTEROR GUNS.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to semibogan

joshgnosis Government MPs keep claiming the parliamentary committee recommended data retention. It didn’t. It said it was a decision for government.

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 7:54 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

johnthelutheran “There’s so much wrong with the world today. For example: did you know people are having conversations tht don’t make money for businesses?”

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 7:52 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

johnthelutheran “Turn conversations into conversions” may be the most depressing sentence I’ve ever read. pic.twitter.com/YBLWrUkSpK

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 7:52 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

I should grab the audio of today’s presser just so I can listen to Brandis say “tranche” again before I go to bed.

via Janetter for Mac

@MsLods It’s not just the word, but I’ll tell you about that another time.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to MsLods

@semibogan @thegrugq This is why the Good Lord invented firearms.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to semibogan

“Australia’s data retention bill - initial reaction”, being a helpful Storify [ugh!] compilation by @MsLods storify.com/MsLods/austral…

via Janetter for Mac

RT @ladyhana: success! I have stuffed the entrails of the computer back in without anything left over :) [Like this? clientsfromhell.net/post/101252604…]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to ladyhana

NewtonMark How great is going to be when goes Federal? Hope none of you MPs have skeletons in your closets, hey?

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 7:25 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

RT @SnarkyPlatypus: The eventual re-education camps are going to be very crowded. [True, but plenty of our friends will be there.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

Wondering how many people the Australian government has working on social media monitoring tonight. Names are added to lists aplenty.

via Janetter for Mac

SnarkyPlatypus To be fair, the ALP doesn’t even need 30 minutes because they’ll just wave them through (feel free to prove me wrong)

via YoruFukurou (retweeted on 7:14 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

RT @oliyoung: @stilgherrian that’s it’s short is a little concerning tbh [Yes, much is left to regulations, which don’t exist yet.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to oliyoung

I love “obtained documents” that are a PDF of a set of crap pictures of sheets of paper pulled from a bin somewhere. images.smh.com.au/file/2014/10/3…

via Janetter for Mac

“Coalition MPs were given just 30 mins to discuss the proposed metadata legislation” before it went to parliament. smh.com.au/federal-politi…

via Janetter for Mac

“Secret government briefing admits metadata law cost and warns of ‘internet tax’ campaign”, writes @jamesmassola smh.com.au/federal-politi…

via Janetter for Mac

kcarruthers So do we think Shorty has worked out how this voting in parliament thing works yet?

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 7:04 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

The PDF of the bill is “only” 51 pages, so this shouldn’t take a huge amount of time.

via Janetter for Mac

@joshgnosis @bengrubb I think my angle will be comparing the rhetoric of what the “intent” of the law is with what it actually says.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to joshgnosis

Explanatory memorandum for “Telecommunications (Interception and Access) Amendment (Data Retention) Bill 2014” parlinfo.aph.gov.au/parlInfo/searc…

via Janetter for Mac

“Telecommunications (Interception and Access) Amendment (Data Retention) Bill 2014” aph.gov.au/Parliamentary_…

via Janetter for Mac

I nearly typed it as “sobpoena” then, @joshgnosis, which would be a good name for them when issued en masse by a rights-holder.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @joshgnosis: Except when a rights holder knows there is a log of every IP address for the past two years… [True, using a subpoena.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to joshgnosis

“Mandatory data retention to be used to fight piracy”, writes @joshgnosis zdnet.com/au/mandatory-d… [AFP said that. Brandis later said no.]

via Janetter for Mac

“Mandatory data retention legislation hits the Australian parliament”, writes @joshgnosis zdnet.com/au/mandatory-d…

via Janetter for Mac

OK, here we go. The metadata legislation. I’ll tweet links to the documents and news reports as I encounter them, plus a few observations.

via Janetter for Mac

I see that there’s already been some Brandisplaining to make things better*.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @MsLods: @stilgherrian this might assist: my collection of resources and reactions to today’s data retention news: storify.com/MsLods/austral…

via Janetter for Mac in reply to MsLods

I have succumbed to certain temptations, namely ginger beer and then chicken to help me survive reading this goddam legislation tonight.

via Janetter for Mac

SwiftOnSecurity How bad is the Australian Prime Minister?
I’m an American and I know his name.

That’s how bad.

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 5:05 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

@SwiftOnSecurity Yeah look much as I love your work, there’s no need to reminds us of that particular Australian arsehattery.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to SwiftOnSecurity

SwiftOnSecurity What the hell YouTube? Do I look like an Australian to you? pic.twitter.com/jfhNwqBAXr

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 4:45 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

@0x1C @semibogan I can resist your temptations. Well, that one for today, anyway. I WILL READ THE LEGISLATION SOBER.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to 0x1C

Returning to writing. I’m on a security-related feature right now. I’m analysing the metadata legislation overnight. Wish me luck. Later.

via Janetter for Mac

zooko Novice engineers have not yet grokked this: the number of modes or options in your system is the *exponent* in how hard it is to maintain.

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 1:39 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

lukehopewell Ugh.

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 1:32 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

RT @SBSNews: New hope of finding Amelia Earhart plane bit.ly/1xEAqPU pic.twitter.com/bWpacMzsHQ [They’re keeping metadata HOW long now?]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to SBSNews

Turnbull introduces data retention legislation. “Excellent,” says Brandis, folding the hood on his cloak. “You are one of us now.”

via Janetter for Mac

ellinghausen The Communications Minister listens as the Attorney-General answers questions on data retention pic.twitter.com/5T1oCramKu

via Twitter for iPad (retweeted on 1:17 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

Kaweechelchen Protester helps police install VLC player pic.twitter.com/rQnl7E5GJo

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 1:15 PM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

@franksting No, but analysing legislation is a commissioned, scheduled story with a payment attached. FireEye’s thingy has come too late.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to franksting

@franksting @paulwallbank In any event, I don’t have time to travel two hours to a thingy when there’s legislation to be analysed.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to franksting

@franksting @paulwallbank What FireEye thingy? I know nothing of this thingy.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to franksting

The writing proceeds adequately. I shall break for lunch, and smile upon the world.

via Janetter for Mac

I am writing now. I won’t be paying much attention to your foolishness.

via Janetter for Mac

Thu plan: Write for @zdnetaustralia, two things to be finished tomorrow; head to a nearby town or village to forage for food.

via Janetter for Mac

franksting It’s about ethics in mandatory detention…sorry retention

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 8:58 AM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

stokely A piece in the Guardian urges people to give up on email & switch to the phone if they want privacy. Also, short skirts are asking for it.

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 8:57 AM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

I seriously picked the wrong week to give up peyote.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @dobes: @stilgherrian you kitten huffing again? [Yes.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to dobes

BRING ME ANOTHER KITTEN.

via Janetter for Mac

So Brandis is on that Question and Answer program Monday? Explaining data retention, I assume? I see.

via Janetter for Mac

RT @joshgnosis: There we go, Turnbull to introduce mandatory data retention today. parlinfo.aph.gov.au/parlInfo/searc… [See, fact checking. Journalism.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to joshgnosis

RT @riskybusiness: Looking forward to seeing this watertight statutory definition of metadata later today. [Ditto. I could use a laugh.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to riskybusiness

Note that the tabling of the Senate report investigating telecommunications interception has been pushed back to 3 December.

via Janetter for Mac

People tweet that @TurnbullMalcolm will introduce Telecommunications (Interception and Access) (Data Retention) Bill 2014 this morning.

via Janetter for Mac

chrisberg australia’s self-wedging opposition

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 8:30 AM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

KazStocks Very clever! RT”@raju: This pic.twitter.com/LolpO4j647 h/t @GINER

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 8:30 AM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

Wait. I’ve got it. RUSSELL BRAND AS LEADER OF THE AUSTRALIAN LABOR PARTY. You know it makes sense.

via Janetter for Mac

“You know those laws that we voted in after three readings in two houses of parliament and a committee review process? Well I’ve just…”

via Janetter for Mac

“Opposition leader writes to Tony Abbott asking the government to review laws, which were passed with Labor support.” theguardian.com/australia-news…

via Janetter for Mac

“Bill Shorten has second thoughts on terrorism laws that could mean jail for journalists”, writes @lenoretaylor theguardian.com/australia-news…

via Janetter for Mac

chrisberg bill are you sure being a legislator is the right career choice

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 8:13 AM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

chrisberg “Bill Shorten has second thoughts on terrorism laws that could mean jail for journalists” bill, mate

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 8:13 AM, Oct 30th, 2014 via Janetter for Mac)

RT @TheMediaTweets: Put the rubber chicken in charge. [I hope the ALP caucus is watching this too.]

via Janetter for Mac in reply to TheMediaTweets

“People trust NSA more than Google, survey says”, writes @ChrisMatyszczyk cnet.com/news/people-tr…

via Janetter for Mac

Wow I’m fixing all the things this morning.

via Janetter for Mac

Secretly hoping that the Australian Labor Party appoints Gwyneth Paltrow as their new leader.

via Janetter for Mac

Secretly hoping that Russell Brand does become Mayor of London.

via Janetter for Mac

Thu plan, draft: Solve every problem on the internet (done); write for @zdnetaustralia. That’s the entire day, just that. Oh, and crying.

via Janetter for Mac

@SnarkyPlatypus Vous êtes un imbécile. Je l’ai résolu l’internet.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

“We Asked A Leading Political Theorist To Look At Russell Brand’s Manifesto And He Wasn’t Happy”, from @BuzzFeedNews buzzfeed.com/jamieross/russ…

via Janetter for Mac

@SnarkyPlatypus Bonjour. Tout est parfait dans tous les sens possible. Et vous?

via Janetter for Mac in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

“Planet of the Brogrammers”, in cinemas 6 November.

via Janetter for Mac

Cut to photograph of the Statue of Liberty half-buried in sand. “Noooooooooo!” Roll credits.

via Janetter for Mac

Neglected plumbing causes your sink to overflow with your own piss. You turn towards the greasy window and shout, BRING ME ANOTHER KITTEN.

via Janetter for Mac

Your credit card statement arrives. It reads: “Unnggh, $16.99. Unnggh, $3.25. Unnggh, $5.99. Unnggh, $699.00. Unnggh, $49.95.”

via Janetter for Mac

Carrot. [Silence.] Helicopter. [Silence.] Piss in sink. “Unnggh!” U2 album. [Silence.] Uber. “Unnggh!” Ebola. [Silence.] Pony. “Unnggh!”

via Janetter for Mac

Then after that, just one app for everything, and one grunt. It shows you random pictures, one per second, and you just grunt at them.

via Janetter for Mac

The next-generation smartphone app interface is just two kinds of grunt. “Errmph” and “Unnggh!”

via Janetter for Mac

So who was it that decided we all now use smartphone apps as if we’re maimed seals? Swipe. “Urrlp!” Swipe. “Urrlp!” Give me a fish now.

via Janetter for Mac

@dobes Then I suppose you won’t be interested in my other startup. It’s called Hoze.

via Janetter for Mac in reply to dobes

“My new startup is called Troff. It’s like Uber, but if you have a sink, then you use the app to swipe right and…”

via Janetter for Mac

@dobes It is excellent and why are you speaking badly of the most intellicleveruptive genius in the world?

via Janetter for Mac in reply to dobes

In even further news surprising no-one, the Australian Labor Party ha… [Thud.] ZZzzzzzzzZzZZzzZZZZZzzzZZZzzzz…

via Janetter for Mac

In further news surprising no-one, Uber continues to be a pack of arseholes. valleywag.gawker.com/the-la-weekly-…

via Janetter for Mac

“Soylent CEO Is Lifehacking Water By Pissing In the Sink”, both today’s best headline and Silicon Valley explained. valleywag.gawker.com/soylent-ceo-is…

via Janetter for Mac