Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

June 9th, 2015

And I want a cocaine-filled chocolate unicorn, but you know what…twitter.com/troyhunt/statu…JT

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Pollytics Was hoping for some special new fact to finish. “It was when Crean strode into the meeting starkers, singing TISM, that was the catalyst”

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 9:45 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

“How to Become a Motivational Speaker in 15 Easy Steps” seanhamptoncole.wordpress.com/2015/06/06/how…

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GreenJ On. Not of. On

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 9:40 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

“It was like that when I found it,” and other lessons from the kindergarten. twitter.com/Professor_Just…

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RichardTuffin “Nervous sip of water”… pic.twitter.com/Q4xjF1GlD9

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 9:14 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

alex_c_lee “Nope. Perfectly relaxed.” pic.twitter.com/MLDTz67XVg

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 9:14 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Rob_Stott Tfw you just realised where you went wrong pic.twitter.com/gaUsa3CyXd

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 9:07 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

I haven’t got a TV to watch live, but it sounds like Conroy is giving the same speech about Rudd he gave me, but with far less swearing.

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@AGFchairman I do hope, in this one case, that the retweet is an endorsement.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to stilgherrian

And there would be gin carts. So many gin carts.

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I’d delegate the running of the country to Clickhole Polling™.

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glengyron Rudd’s still a cunt though.

via Twitter for iPad (retweeted on 8:57 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

MrGarumph Pretty much. pic.twitter.com/5Isrd9lRL3

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 8:57 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@flabberdacks It’s always hard to beat a good Gwyneth Paltrow story.

via TweetDeck in reply to flabberdacks

“6 Steps To Take Immediately When Your Identity’s Been Stolen” clickhole.com/article/6-step… Ping @Steve_Lockstep pic.twitter.com/AnX6YnTW8h

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“Gwyneth Paltrow Tried To Survive A Week On Food Stamps And She Died” clickhole.com/article/gwynet… pic.twitter.com/1sSS2apN5O

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“Live A Little! Press Your Tongue Against These 10 Pictures Of Tongues” clickhole.com/article/live-l… pic.twitter.com/xXmWYrYsqA

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@oberonsghost @joannejacobs @willozap Oh the broadcast reception apparatus is in pieces on the floor and I really couldn’t give a fuck.

via TweetDeck in reply to oberonsghost

joeheenan As I’m one of Britain’s leading ornithologists, here’s a guide to some birds you might see in your garden this summer pic.twitter.com/SFQ5U0xRM7

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 8:45 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

BuzzFeedOzPol Ready for ? Printed off your bingo card? Why do you own a printer? pic.twitter.com/SOJr6vxVzG

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 8:40 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

I’ve fallen down the Clickhole and I can’t get up.

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“We Asked 22 Meteorologists About The Worst Storm They’ve Ever Created To Punish An Ex-Lover” clickhole.com/article/we-ask… pic.twitter.com/5SQGAm4goi

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“Beautiful: Gay Couple Argues In Parking Lot” clickhole.com/video/beautifu…

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Remember “7 Classic ’90s Toys That Weren’t Fun Anymore After 9/11”? clickhole.com/article/7-clas…

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Remember “Which Hungry Hungry Hippo Are You?”? clickhole.com/quiz/which-hun…

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Remember “16 Pictures Of Beyoncé Where She’s Not Sinking In Quicksand”? clickhole.com/article/16-pic…

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“Wow. ClickHole.”, being a brief history of the brief history of @ClickHole slate.com/articles/arts/…

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@PointZeroOne @petstarr Yeah but @drearyclocks is some weird fuckin’ alien creature.

via TweetDeck in reply to PointZeroOne

petstarr How to make a Buzzfeed food video:
1. Stuff something with cheese
2. Wrap it in bacon
3. Film it.

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 8:21 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@_midofo_ Yeah, as @daniels_den will doubtless recall too, a great network technically, but an incredibly badly-run business.

via TweetDeck in reply to _midofo_

ASPI_ICPC What is Indonesia’s National Cyber Agency? – The Short Answer >@WSJSow.ly/O3s2cI5

via Hootsuite (retweeted on 8:18 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

“Australia, we need your help,” says Samsung. News of their washing machine safety recall needs spreading. samsung.com/au/washingmach…

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@daniels_den Heh. I miss the really high quality internet link (56k dial-up back then) that they never got around to billing me for.

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@Nicholosophy Yeah, he’s in all that PeopleBrowsr stuff. “Social aggregation” and other stuff the SMEGs like.

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No, Jodee. Just, no. This is why we can’t have nice things. pic.twitter.com/jqt94HXnrX

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RT [REDACTED]: Shameless politicking by a Human Rights Commissioner, he must resign immediately. twitter.com/lenoretaylor/s…

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@BlogsofWar We’ve swapped, and I’m back in the Mountains now. But @R_Chirgwin says DETER POSSUM is just a sharp tap in the nose.

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@scott_thewspot @WIRED So you’ve missed an important part of the article. Windows and Android versions by year’s end.

via TweetDeck in reply to scott_thewspot

Well this should certain amuse* the Russians, eh @BlogsofWar? twitter.com/USNavyEurope/s…

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“Everything You Need to Know About Apple Music”, by @WIRED wired.com/2015/06/everyt…

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@SnarkyPlatypus Mind you, I am not a telco analyst, so this is unqualified feelpinion at this stage.

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@SnarkyPlatypus Slow and steady pressure from Optus and Vodafone. I can’t see anyone doing a massive cut, not with the capex costs.

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I did all my Joe Hockey tweets earlier. I’m over it now.

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Thanks, @SkyNews, for referring to the Ohio Incident as an “Aporkalyptic Crash” news.sky.com/story/1498793/… pic.twitter.com/AQbW1KaAZE

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jturner_ibrs I love this. Had to share. pic.twitter.com/YUwc7lwike

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 7:29 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

That said, @mwyres, I rather like the idea of amphibious baseball players.

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mwyres Oh dear, headline writer pic.twitter.com/hx7uu97LJT

via iOS (retweeted on 7:25 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@OaaSvc I’m actually getting close to being able to understand my @Telstra bills. My next step, being able to cross-check them.

via TweetDeck in reply to OaaSvc

A flurry of SMS messages indicates that the @Telstra megamainframeborg has absorbed the change in my mobile data arrangements.

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@shoerust If Optus and Vodafone can keep up the data price pressure on Telstra, I’m all for it.

via TweetDeck in reply to shoerust

@OaaSvc You have to covert your account over. It’s described as a “promotion”, which implies it might be withdrawn.

via TweetDeck in reply to OaaSvc

@mpesce One miracle at a time, eh?

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Thank the gods, @Telstra has dumped that annoying concept of mobile data packs, and now has a flat $10/GB for data outside the base plan.

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@alexkidman I didn’t even know we were meant to be shooting.

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Epigrammist I think you’re all being very unkind to @JoeHockey. He worked very hard to marry a wealthy woman.

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 6:27 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

“Revealed: How the UN told Abbott government to back off on Gillian Triggs”, reports @theage theage.com.au/federal-politi…

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Headlines which are always true, even without the “special”. twitter.com/BuzzFeedOz/sta…

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RobJamesBerry I like that programmers are considered somewhere between pre-school children and people with higher education pic.twitter.com/rV42nafgwR

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 6:16 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@virag064 @R_Chirgwin So, give it a good blow, you reckon?

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Dobbing people in to the media.

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humphriesmark Bolt’s blog looks like the Brady Bunch opening credits if all the Bradys were played by Andrew Bolt. pic.twitter.com/QQUVK9iHkb

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 5:52 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Grease the camel, you say?

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Would you have to pay the camel?

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MrDenmore How about we compare house prices against real incomes? You’re going to need a REALLY good job. pic.twitter.com/8E9rFTs0et

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 5:30 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Me at @zdnetaustralia: “Is cybersecurity moving away from all the military language?” zdnet.com/article/is-cyb…

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“It would be easier to push a camel through the eye of Scott Morrison’s…” Wait, where am I going with this?

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So if I said “anal fissure” at this point…

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Scott Morrison versus Humanity, part 2 of 2. twitter.com/MarkDiStef/sta…

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Scott Morrison versus Humanity, part 1 of 2. twitter.com/GuardianAus/st…

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@monsieurarion Or, more literally, a new stable base for SIGINT in this part of the planet.

via TweetDeck in reply to monsieurarion

5at5 number 194: Two mysteries, time and getting old, a history of passwords, and Apple’s news for news outlets. tinyletter.com/5at5/letters/5…

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@monsieurarion Hence the alliances with the bigger powers.

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@monsieurarion Also, that price is at the low end of the bell curve for a 2-day conference.

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@monsieurarion Well, a “media pass” translates into not having to pay. But it’s still a couple days in a Canberra hotel.

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“Defence science and innovation: an affordable strategic advantage”, from @ASPI_org aspistrategist.org.au/defence-scienc…

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@monsieurarion This one? aspi.org.au/events/armys-f… Looks a bit too Army for me to be able to sell it to editors.

via TweetDeck in reply to monsieurarion

@monsieurarion I have not heard of such a thing. Stand by while I check the dates.

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Tomorrow at this time I’ll be giving my uninformed feelpinion of campgrounded.org and digitaldetox.org on ABC @891adelaide.

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Whenever I see someone tweet “Here is the Vine of <event>” I think “Here is the crayon of Hamlet”.

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Speaking of drugs, it looks like @GizmodoAU’s supply has lasted beyond the long weekend… twitter.com/GizmodoAU/stat…

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neptunecutie i hate people who dress like this…….we get it, you smoke weed pic.twitter.com/CLpUvk32Po

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 4:19 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Column filed for @zdnetaustralia. It contains grandmothers on Skype, and so much cybering it’s starting to chafe.

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OK, back to writing…

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Dear Internet, Mr Hockey needs your advice. You know what to do. (Just tweet, no need to copy me in.) twitter.com/latikambourke/…

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TheDirtySports Kobe Bryant says Shaq’s laziness drove him crazy…Shaq responded: “Kobe missing practice to go to court for rape drove me crazy.”

via Hootsuite (retweeted on 1:51 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@MsLods @BernardKeane @scottamcintyre @Anthony_Caruana All main-room presentations were Livestream’d, should be on YouTube at some point.

via TweetDeck in reply to MsLods

Is it too early to ask “Is it on?”?

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zackster Joe Hockey dashes to the front of the Leaderboard, a nervous Peter Dutton schedules a press conference to regain the lead

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 1:39 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

s_bridges Bole Shuntner has seen heaps of ordinary people in focus group videos.

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 1:38 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Look, @samsonjbutler, how could Hockey possibly understand this? It has both facts AND arithmetic. twitter.com/samsonjbutler/…

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True, @Tim_Beshara. but part of me wants Hockey to be Treasurer forever, just so I can see how hilarious it actually gets.

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Tim_Beshara Either way Senior Cabinet sources will be quoted tomorrow saying how much of a liability Hockey is.

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 1:35 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

conradhackett Blue states have more people in college housing, red states more people in prisons & jails

vox.com/2015/1/21/7865… pic.twitter.com/hNOO7v2wmX

via Sprout Social (retweeted on 1:30 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Meanwhile, in tonight’s episode of “Cabbage Boy and the Invisible Sausage” … pic.twitter.com/4UllPiRmcS

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Meanwhile, what’s Boat Shrimpnet doing? Working up a zinger about marshmallow export quotas?

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I’m meant to be writing, but I’m transfixed. Which Minister will be first to suggest low-paid parents sell their children to an organ bank?

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I say, the front-benchers are truly outdoing themselves in an effort to win tonight’s episode of “The Ankle Factor”.

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Yes, Cabbage Boy, in the same way that some kids get ill-informed out of their lunch money… twitter.com/huwdrury/statu…

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Steve_Lockstep You might think opinion would be divided over choc-coated bacon w Bourbon maple syrup. But no. HT @bmkatz pic.twitter.com/5jOSlmcvU3

via iOS (retweeted on 1:11 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

mumbletwits If don’t have TV go out and buy one. .twitter.com/sabinahusic/st…

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 1:11 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Meanwhile, @cathywilcox1 illustrates not so much the “property ladder” as the property shovel. twitter.com/cathywilcox1/s…

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That thing the banks refer to as the “property ladder”? Joe Hockey just kicks it out from under you.

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The Treasurer bit the head off another whippet, sucked it dry, threw its carcass onto the pile. ‘The low-paid? Let them eat rent,’” he said.

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ThePhilby wowee big boy pic.twitter.com/X0o6AAk5Qg

via Echofon (retweeted on 12:55 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@R_Chirgwin @KetanJ0 That wouldn’t have mattered last night.

via TweetDeck in reply to R_Chirgwin

@KetanJ0 Awww… It’s only 10kW? Mayb@R_Chirgwinin should get a couple.

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@R_Chirgwin @morebento Nah, it’s all OK. “Java application,” it says, so you know it’s going to be secure.

via TweetDeck in reply to R_Chirgwin

MarkDiStef Not a drill: More than 2,000 piglets are on the loose after a truck crash in Ohio buzzfeed.com/mbvd/more-than… pic.twitter.com/UfCQZ974ZY

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 12:29 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

NickEvershed how to buy a house in Sydney:

1) invent time machine
2) become retrospectively wealthy without disrupting the fabric of reality

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 12:28 PM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@R_Chirgwin Don’t tell Joe, he’ll be out there with his 386 trying to do it.

via TweetDeck in reply to R_Chirgwin

@morebento Oh I know what it is (thanks to the Google), I’m lulwutting why the fuck you’d do such a thing. Although I know why. Sigh.

via TweetDeck in reply to morebento

@dannolan Is this VB’s new TV advertising campaign?

via TweetDeck in reply to dannolan

“The XZERES 442SR Wind Turbine has a web-based interface system,” and yeah you can guess how the rest of this goes. ics-cert.us-cert.gov/advisories/ICS…

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ICS-CERT warns of vulnerabilities in XZERES’s 442SR wind turbine generator. Attacker could cause loss of power. ics-cert.us-cert.gov/advisories/ICS…

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drearyclocks “If housing was unaffordable in Sydney nobody would be buying it,” said Hockey as he trod on 1,000 faces on his way to the cigar store.

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 11:46 AM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

I’ve always loved this story. “How These Stoner Kids Landed a $300M Pentagon Arms Contract” motherjones.com/politics/2015/…

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“Government Cracks Down On Public Transport Racism By Banning Trains” sbs.com.au/comedy/article… pic.twitter.com/yeCB3kUXbx

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“We Don’t Need A Crisis To Act Unitedly Against Cyber Threats”, writes @Wharton, but I suspect we probably will do. forbes.com/sites/knowledg…

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johnb78 “yeah he looks a bit Chinese or something, certainly not our sort of bloke” twitter.com/3AW693/status/…

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 11:19 AM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@scottamcintyre @MsLods @Anthony_Caruana I’d kinda read @BernardKeane’s thing piecemeal as his thesis developed. Yes, a good, solid work.

via TweetDeck in reply to scottamcintyre

@BXGD @LiamT That would be the well-known Cultural Cringe, another Australian invention. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cultural_…

via TweetDeck in reply to BXGD

omgitscras Yeah uhh, about that..

cc: @troyhunt pic.twitter.com/1HgKphC2HU

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 11:09 AM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Sometimes I think that @dobes has this tweet on speed dial. twitter.com/dobes/status/6…

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Juices. Flowing juices.

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“The fight for the Internet is not over”, writes @Anthony_Caruana on @BernardKeane’s AusCERT keynote. cso.com.au/article/576947…

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@BXGD @LiamT I’m going to steal some of these lines for my next podcast.

via TweetDeck in reply to BXGD

Tue plan: Write for @zdnetaustralia; late lunch, Katoomba; go through my notes from last week; @5at5daily; quiet evening, I hope

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@david_heath @LiamT That’s both brilliant and terrible all at once!

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@BXGD @LiamT I know. So if we do get a gun, we just stand around, gazing aimlessly, wondering “So, um, what do we do now?”

via TweetDeck in reply to BXGD

erstkate The cat is simultaneously dead, alive, in two places and shooting laser beams into its own eyes pic.twitter.com/ReWhc9xc1e

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 10:09 AM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@ScooterDMC @LiamT Hold on, just calling Certain People about you now…

via TweetDeck in reply to ScooterDMC

“Dangerous minds: Are maths teachers Australia’s newest threat?” writes @LiamT smh.com.au/it-pro/securit…

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Apparently there’s some sort of security problem with the internet.

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ingating The five suburbs where minimum wage workers can afford to rent smh.com.au/nsw/the-sydney… @smh pic.twitter.com/cQd35vEGM0

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 9:24 AM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Is @Steve_Lockstep being difficult again?

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There’s been a lot of Voight-Kampffing going on lately.

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Beheading the Mayor of Geelong? Yeah, I’d not be opposed to that. I did read this correctly, right? twitter.com/mwyres/status/…

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“iiNet investigates alleged theft of customer database”, writes @juhasaarinen, with an update. itnews.com.au/News/404959,ii…

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“iiNet investigates alleged Westnet data breach”, writes @joshgnosis zdnet.com/article/iinet-…

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“Who wrote this amazing mysterious book satirizing tech startup culture?” asks @alexismadrigal fusion.net/story/146648/w… pic.twitter.com/XJHcIvVzsf

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“Of History & Hashes: A Brief History of Password Storage, Transmission, & Cracking” by @isdpodcast trustedsec.com/may-2015/passw…

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@SnarkyPlatypus Everybody wants to be Facebook, because “billions and billions” trumps everything. See also @umairh’s “15 Signs” post.

via TweetDeck in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

Tue plan, draft: Write for @zdnetaustralia, somehow, on some topic or other; late lunch, Katoomba; @5at5daily; quiet evening, I hope.

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GrahamDavidA Today in unfortunate missing spaces pic.twitter.com/AzcJ3GuRUe

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 8:16 AM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

Twitter certainly wants to be a media company rather than a communications company, but a commercial whore rather than a news organisation.

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In which Twitter operates a 1984-like Memory Hole rather than allowing the reporting of facts. Ping @deptofaustralia twitter.com/huwdrury/statu…

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_FloridaMan Florida Man Tries to Kidnap Estranged Wife While Wearing Fake Pregnancy Belly nwfdailynews.com/local/man-wear…

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 8:09 AM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

privacyint In wake of US , we’re taking UK spy agencies to court over bulk domestic spying.
privacyinternational.org/?q=node/594 pic.twitter.com/jkt1PMSc14

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 8:02 AM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

@davispg @NiemanLab One can only hope. Have you MET journalists? Filth, they are. Just filth.

via TweetDeck in reply to davispg

@MLBrook @kcarruthers I like the alliteration too, but @umairh’s US audience wouldn’t know what a “twat” was.

via TweetDeck in reply to MLBrook

iowahawkblog MANSPLAINERS II: THE REVENGENING pic.twitter.com/555bBjzCjc

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 7:54 AM, Jun 9th, 2015 via TweetDeck)

“For news organizations, this was the most important set of Apple announcements in years”, writes @NiemanLab niemanlab.org/2015/06/for-ne…

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@davispg Oh yes, and in 3+ decades of working in the media, I’ve seen some excellent* trash being taken out on days like this.

via TweetDeck in reply to davispg

If you’re still catching up on last week, there’s tons of stuff in my Weekly Wrap. stilgherrian.com/weekly-wrap/26… pic.twitter.com/9vvrDWZgZJ

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Oh that’s right, there was an Apple thing. No need for me to rush then today, there is NO other technology news. Fuckin’ goldfish.

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@andreitaflan @Bitdefender Excellent news, Andrei. I look forward to catching up again.

via TweetDeck in reply to andreitaflan

Tuesday. Why do you even bother? You will fail, and fail badly. And we will laugh so hard. Tuesday.

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