Gorn.
Tonight’s viewing suggestion: “The Mitchell and Webb Situation”, 6 episodes. youtube.com/playlist?list=…
TrendsAustralia #analglands is now trending in Australia trendsmap.com/au
OF COURSE IT’S A THING, @PointZeroOne, I LINKED TO A PAGE ON THE INTERNET.
Unless… Unless this is all part of Richard Branson’s SEKRIT plan to HURL THEM ALL INTO THE SUN.
“List of Virgin Records artists” en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_V… I mean, where do you begin? Where the fuck do you begin?
@semibogan “Who’s ‘we’, white man?”
So the entrepreneur who brought you “Tubular Bells” and King Crimson will oversee your retirement low-orbit holidays. Good luck with that.
semibogan There is only one gun hacker that mattered kids, and his name was Kalashnikov.
So, Twitter, sack ALL the executives and WIN. twitter.com/VentureBeat/st…
YouTube comment on same: “I’ve taken a lot of drugs and watched a comedy thing on netflix which has led me to this and its a good place.”
Tonight’s listening: Robert Fripp’s “God Save the Queen” & “Under Heavy Manners” (1980) youtube.com/watch?v=IXMxcZ… You can thank me later.
@jonoabroad Wot?
@JohnDobbin Look at the faces of cellists. They are troubled people.
@jonoabroad No, you’re possibly thinking of Lemon Party.
How can you be both a cellist and a libertarian? The cello is one of the ultimate regimented cog-in-machine tools of oppression.
@semibogan Oh.
Well here’s a sentence you don’t see every day! twitter.com/7homask/status…
troyhunt Can’t we just go back to connecting lightbulbs?! “Hackers Can Disable a Sniper Rifle—Or Change Its Target”:wired.com/2015/07/hacker…k
@vanOnselenP @GreenJ Hmmm. Twitter may have broken the link to the Wikipedia entry, but I’m sure you’ll be able to work around that.
@vanOnselenP @GreenJ Well, yes, gentleman. It’s the Dunning-Kruger Effect. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning–Kruger_effecyouarenotsosmart.com/2014/11/10/yan…rj
RichardTuffin There’s alot that’s wrong about this photo really. twitter.com/RT_com/status/…
My God, what have you unearthed there, Camel Boy?
@drearyclocks Public urination.
@scott_thewspot @j_hutch Oh well that’s OK* then.

ThePoke 27 creative childhood photo recreations
thepoke.co.uk/2015/07/28/27-… pic.twitter.com/VPEmPtHcjb
@_midofo_ Pretty much. IIRC, the entire Telstra network in WA comes back to Perth before interconnecting.
Hahaha! “Designed for Cortana” microphones. What a crock. twitter.com/waltmossberg/s…
@_midofo_ I know why such “mistakes” happen mainly ‘cos of Telstra’s network architecture, but they always still amuse.
Ah, such maps bring back memories of writing for an energy news site during the first Gulf War! twitter.com/Stratfor/statu…
A brilliant example of a high school student refusing to give in to the authority of a professor they know is wrong. twitter.com/sally_j/status…
sally_j Professor Says “No Irish Need Apply” Signs Never Existed; 17 y.o. Researcher Proved Him Wrong longislandwins.com/columns/detail… cc: @megansmolenyak
I know “arson” is an ugly word, @BernardKeane, but. You know what to do. twitter.com/BernardKeane/s…
@_midofo_ Ah yes. For some reason I thought you were in Perth. Beginner’s mistake. As you were.
j_hutch Windows 10 shares wi-fi passwords with contacts by default. Sure, that’s a great idea that will in no way backfire. forbes.com/sites/amitchow…
@_midofo_ You’re perhaps further north than I’d suspected.
@_midofo_ I would say that you are wrong. I will still take your money, obviously, but you ARE wrong. I will elaborate upon this later.
What this strange Welsh gentleman says is true. twitter.com/BennettArron/s…
@jturner_ibrs @scott_thewspot Ah. That’s standard we-are-greedy-cunts legalese, but no, I wouldn’t have gone of they just want fan footage.
@StanCarey I am a bad person.
@scott_thewspot @jturner_ibrs I said “happy”, not “batshit insane”.
@jturner_ibrs @scott_thewspot I CAN BE HAPPY YOU KNOW I CAN EVEN BE HAPPY WHEN EATING MICROSOFT FOOD AND DRINKING MICROSOFT DRINK.
@StanCarey @JWGrieve Not helped by then going on to produce 4000+ hours of talkback radio for the ABC. Like giving crack to a baby.
@StanCarey @JWGrieve When I did linguistics at Uni of Adelaide, a mad Dutch sociolinguist got me hooked on this stuff…
@StanCarey BTW, I enjoyed the playfulness of your recent double-passives yarn.
@StanCarey @JWGrieve Heh. I’d love to see some AU maps, but we might need to invent some new colours for that.
So apparently the US fucks more on the edges. Or something. Thanks, @StanCarey @JWGrieve! twitter.com/stronglang/sta…
@ozjimbob Yeah look there’s an awfully big amount of quantum physics explained right there in that video, I’d say.
jturner_ibrs These early #Windows10 adopters are so hungry they’re licking the faces of the staff carrying the stripped bare food platters
@expectproblems I have a different amalgam in mind, but I won’t say it here, because They are Listening.
@expectproblems Also, other categories of people.
@mpesce Oh God, I’ve been told that’s dreadfully… persistent.
NASA should’ve gotten Robert Anton Wilson to compile that audio disc. THAT would’ve shown those efffing aliens!
@mpesce Yeah, but you know, Robert Anton Wilson. So swings and roundabouts, right?
@mpesce Yeah, I think that when we ask these sorts of questions that there should be a special exemption for you.
It was all Carl Sagan’s idea, and, well, do you know how much effing weed that man smoked?
In 1977, we sent @NASAVoyager into space with audio to explain Planet Earth. This is what the Aliens will hear. soundcloud.com/nasa/sets/gold…
@Taco_Lad @alex_c_lee Wow. That’s… baroque.
@franksting Goodness me. This gets funnier by the minute.
@_midofo_ I would never call @KeithConlon a “relic”. Not anywhere he could see, anyway.

My second roll with @alex_c_lee’s thingy was… more surrealbuzzfeed.com/alexlee/whats-…kpic.twitter.com/iMtPxfY5RwRw

“What’s YOUR Political Expenses Scandal?” Spin the wheel with @alex_c_lee’s handy thingy! buzzfeed.com/alexlee/whats-… pic.twitter.com/PhCKI5Rv4K
@RanTLaw Oh God, I know what that’s like. I helped renew a cast iron stove once, and the Yelta’s boiler would have been… erk!

A CORRECTED breakdown of the telethon-style Rewards chosen so far, requested by @jeamland. An even split on language. pic.twitter.com/8nqBVCbOji
Oops. There’s an error in that chart. Stand by for a correction.
There’s a Windows 10 launch in Sydney tonight? Heh. Clearly that part of Microsoft still hasn’t moved on from Certain Events. Hilarious.
@RanTLaw Look, it’s just coal. Coal is the future.

This time last night I launched “The 9pm Urgent Hardware Refresh”. We’re at 32% of Target One. pozible.com/edict2 pic.twitter.com/o20LMvBfIz

Well done today, @deptofaustralia @crikey_news, well done. pic.twitter.com/bo8m0BJbQE
Hey Adelaide folks, are you into steamy encounters on a regular basis? Here’s something for you, via @KeithConlon! twitter.com/KeithConlon/st…
@mmccue Hope you have a better one today.
jturner_ibrs Approaching the #Windows10 launch. Botanical gardens. That rat is looking at me funny
@mmccue Anyway, boys and girls, I think we’ve all learned something here today… Sigh. I feel for whoever did it.

@mmccue Well, I’m good, but of course I got it run in today’s @crikey_news … so ~100k AU political/ media wonks. ;pic.twitter.com/NbP1Q1fN2r2r
@mmccue My renown dark sense of humour found it hilarious, of course. How did it happen? Googling for “blocks”, I guess?
@semibogan @paulkidd True. Though my supplies are low, and I’m not sure I can be arsed heading into the village for more. It’d a cold night.

Yeah, probably, @paulkidd… pic.twitter.com/gCAAdGo7ka
Won’t SOMEBODY think of Shannon Noll? twitter.com/paulkidd/statu…
@virag064 @GuardianAus I’m coming from the position that grown-up journalismists don’t use “words” like “Grexit” unless it’s quoted speech.

reesieboi Oh please do. @heraldsunreader pic.twitter.com/RXkkepbXAm
This is an important question, @GuardianAus. It goes to character. Did Merkel’s ally use the word “Grexit”? twitter.com/GuardianAus/st…
More excellence* in transparency and honesty from Uber. twitter.com/jamesrbuk/stat…
@Epigrammist @jodiem @Craig_Harvey Oh indeed!
@Epigrammist @jodiem @Craig_Harvey Mind you, I learned the hard way to NEVER again go drinking with those fuckers. Never. :)
@Epigrammist @jodiem @Craig_Harvey I would like to see this. A mate was in 3RAR, and he just loved doing jumps. Especially HALO, he said.
@benetsc @jodiem @Epigrammist @Craig_Harvey The caption says it’s a C-17. heavyairliftwing.org/en/Pages/Boein…
@benetsc @DeptDefence You can’t fail with a solid transport aircraft. No matter what the missions, you’ll need to move stuff. Lots of stuff.

@jodiem @Epigrammist @Craig_Harvey Here we go. It’s not glamorous. pic.twitter.com/mAnPXVyG5j
@jodiem @Epigrammist @Craig_Harvey You can slide in rows of seats, and the upper deck has fixed seating IIRC.
@Epigrammist @jodiem @Craig_Harvey I was originally scheduled to visit one of those camps in northern Tanzania. They’re… not small.
@jplonie @jodiem Heh. I haven’t used Windows (apart from Windows Phone, which I like a lot) since… the one that started with “V”. A bit.
@jodiem @jplonie And add in having to bun entirely new software, and develop and debug entirely new production workflows.
@jplonie Now look… Where do I even start?
@jodiem @Epigrammist @Craig_Harvey And yes, watched the same aircraft to STOL work. Very, very impressive.
@jodiem @Epigrammist @Craig_Harvey I’ve been in the back of one (on the ground), impressed with the all the cargo-handling gear.
These C-17A military transports are fat little fuckers, aren’t they. twitter.com/DeptDefence/st…
@TristanRayner I think I might be able to save a heap there, though, so thanks for the reminder.
@TristanRayner True. I’ve just never tried getting the prescription by itself. They’ve been integrated optometrist / shops like OPSM.
@TristanRayner Ah, good thinking. I think they’re the people I was thinking of a few weeks back. I have no current prescription though.
Less than 24 hours into “The 9pm Urgent Hardware Refresh” @Pozible and it’s at 31% of Target One. Thanks, all. pozible.com/edict2
@JustJimWillDo @nehadk This would make sense. This is where the Sherrin branding normally sits on the ball.
HOW DO THEY KNOW? IT IS A COMPLEAT MISTARY. twitter.com/NathanJL35/sta…
@nehadk That is, yes. My curiosity is piqued now.
See, I told you that Adelaide radio had gone to the dogs. This is 2100 ACST, for Adelaide folks who can’t do times. twitter.com/nphair/status/…
Said the actress to the bishop… twitter.com/shiftkey/statu…
Or, @nehadk, is it just a transliteration of “Sherrin”?
Orly? I’m sure it’s meant to be Arabic not Farsi, though? (I am out of my depth here.) twitter.com/nehadk/status/…
I’m not sure, however, @firstdogonmoonm that there’s an AFL team called the Mullumbimby Methdealers. Not under that name, anyway.
“He should listen to the white people telling him the correct way to complain about racism,” draws @firstdogonmoon theguardian.com/commentisfree/…
@mattdasilva Do you plan on eating it?

Tell you what, though, we should take a couple of these down to Cronulla for a bit of a kick-around. pic.twitter.com/WqSKgaIS7h
Doesn’t the very fact that the @AFL has a “multicultural round” mean that… I mean… oh why do we even bothtwitter.com/AFL/status/626…sYtb
@piecritic You wash your mouth out.
I probably should have read it back before pressing “Send”. Oops.
Column filed for @zdnetaustralia.
Nearly there.
@jeamland I will provide these figures at the 24-hour mark, I think. This evening, Sydney time.
@ordinarytanya I hadn’t previously heard of those allegations. I’m just reading this one story in the news today.
So Manus Island managers could be charged with perverting the course of justice? That’d go down well, eh.
PNG police threaten to “arrest all managers at the Manus Island detention centre” unless rape accused return to PNG. abc.net.au/news/2015-07-2…
@dobes Don’t let @lukehopewell see that.
TrendsSydney ‘bestiality’ is now trending in #Sydney trendsmap.com/au/sydney
@dobes Give it a few years. Or combine the two instances into the one mental image.
Yeah well I’M turned on… obviously..twitter.com/BBC_Future/sta…7r
@ericscheid This might have been cybering on a sufficient scale as to end up on television.
Cybering my little heart out.
@OaaSvc Yep, this would be it. I’m just starting to read it now.
“Australian Cyber Security Centre uses discredited data to quantify infosec threats”, writes @R_Chirgwin theregister.co.uk/2015/07/29/aus…
“Australian Cyber Security Centre (ACSC) Threat Report 2015” acsc.gov.au/publications/A… (PDF) and press release acsc.gov.au/publications/2… (PDF)
I wanted to see the flags. Sulk.
2. Aust Cyber Security Centre (ACSC) threat report is out, so no Rabbit’n’Flags presser? acsc.gov.au/news.html

1. Almost 18 hours into “The 9pm Urgent Hardware Refresh” and we’ve hit 29% of Target One! pozible.com/edict2 pic.twitter.com/o20LMvBfIz
Oh dear. I seem to have raised too many topics at once. As usual. So, I’ll pull it back to the two biggies for the day.
@timfdavis @SnarkyPlatypus The “Russian gas technique” wasn’t exactly a winner in that regard.
@PollHereford @marcfennell The theme song came up in last month’s episode of “The 9pm Edict” podcast too. Strange world.
Doesn’t that need a comma? Or are you suggesting a new activity we should indulge in? And if so, how do we do it? twitter.com/joshgnosis/sta…
I have never craved vast quantities of hallucinogens as much as I am RIGHT NOW. twitter.com/BadRealtyPhoto…
@PollHereford @marcfennell Obviously.
@freshchilli Oh you’ll see.
HERE IS RATHER MORE IMPORTANT NEWS WHICH I JUST OBTAINED VIA @marcfennell! twitter.com/SBS2/status/62…
@reselsnark @sspencer_63 Depends whether I’ve remembered to use the ointment.
I think I’d better mute that hashtag from Canberra.
@gordonkerry Nah, he’ll want it on both ABC News24 and Sky News, and they can’t do both.
Seriously, PR Practitioners, the things I see your clients getting “excited” about just tells me they seriously need to get out more.
Dear PR Practitioners, your challenge is to go the entire month of August without using “exciting” or “excited” in any press release.

Tony_Burke Online polls have weaknesses but I’ve never seen one like this. #choppergate @latikambourke m.smh.com.au/federal-politi… pic.twitter.com/MfviZYt47r
Getting preschoolers even more “excited” than they already are? Parents everywhere will be thanking* @abckids… twitter.com/ABCTVPublicity…
GreenJ all convivial in the green room …twitter.com/ellinghausen/s…Xa
@jcase @thegrugq A PDF file called “Practical Android Exploitation”, you say? And I just download it, eh? Good-o.
“Microsoft sinks in antivirus tests, as Avira, Bitdefender hit top scores”, writes @zackwhittaker zdnet.com/article/micros… Kaspersky also top.
So no news on when the Rabbit might flag up for the ACSC report presser, assuming that it’ll be him personally. (But why wouldn’t it be?)
Has the Rabbit flagged up yet, or indicated when it might happen?
“Happy Birthday Copyright Bombshell: New Evidence Warner Music Previously Hid Shows Song Is Public Domain” techdirt.com/articles/20150…
And the train is still a train. twitter.com/R_Chirgwin/sta…
@Mick_Peel I think you’ve have to explain this to me live, in between chapters of “Battlelines”.
Note to self, a media idea: Spare weekend; Crusader Rabbit’s “Battlelines”; peyote and/or LSD; live video stream.

peterogburn I’d honestly be more embarrassed about getting engaged at a hibachi restaurant than the whole initials thing tbh pic.twitter.com/F9pzWDyK5f
johnemcintyre AP writers still use “nix.” That takes moxie. #amediting

alex_c_lee Where does Bronny sit on the Political Strife Scale today @ABCnewsIntern? pic.twitter.com/y6IujAHPQv
I think that the wrong thing that I just typed into an email was very wrong.
@scottcarson1957 Well the idea is to make damn sure the job is done and your side comes away unscathed, right?
@scottcarson1957 You could also have weeded them out with an under-powered weapon but, as you say, that’d be unsporting.

Well this looks ideal. [Check calendar.] Oh, what a shame. pic.twitter.com/4e2R8mvtTM
@buddhawilliams That’s a mystery that @Pozible might be able to solve, but gawd, how would it even…? [Confused shrug.]
@buddhawilliams @Pozible Ta.
@buddhawilliams Oh, well, you can add dollars to a “lower” Reward, yes. Anyway, if we’re good, I’ll let that mystery subside. And thanks.
@Pozible Thanks, but @buddhawilliams has kindly said he’ll let it stand.
@buddhawilliams Thanks, that’s most generous, but it still feels like I swiped a 50 from your pocket. I’ve let @Pozible know.
@Pozible, have you heard about this sort of thing happening before? Tongue Lashing is a $50 Reward. twitter.com/buddhawilliams…
@buddhawilliams Oh. That’s a worry. I think it can be reversed, though. You should be able to cancel and re-pledge, IIRC.
@reillystyley Excellent. Great yarn, that. Much enjoyed. Very pert.
Wed plan, redraft: Laundry; prepare for extensive cybering as required; @5at5daily; plug @Pozible campaign. “The 9pm Edict” is now Thursday.
I seriously like some of the TWO MINUTES HATE topics that have been chosen for “The 9pm Urgent Hardware Refresh” special episode.
@will_ock Also, IIRC, the figures in the Norton report have been dropping in recent years as methodology and our defences sharpen up.
@will_ock Sheer laziness.
Oops, forgot to make that @Pozible campaign “public”. But only people I tweet will be interested anyway, I guess. Glitch fixed. We’ll see.

Lyndsay_Kirkham The most popular searches coming out of the PornHub “research data” are fantastic. pic.twitter.com/NhKNSuXmQ8
I heard that this was good TV, but the hashtags are disturbing twitter.com/sarah_mcv/stat…
” … as though my soul has been dipped into a simmering cauldron of Eddie Maguire’s anal leakage.” Ta@JohnBirminghamacheeseburgergothic.com/show/6323Uz
@jodiem I’ll wait until I’ve read the actual report rather than PMO’s spin as filtered through The Australian.
@SnarkyPlatypus Hey, for some of us, online circle jerks is already a business model.
@joshgnosis @will_ock That’s a lot of cybering. I’d better organise a clean shirt.
@SnarkyPlatypus He should just wear a RBG-green safari suit and we can Chromakey anything we like onto him.
The lion probably regrets his actions too. @Colvinius twitter.com/SkyNews/status…
@will_ock Right. I see how this works.
Preparing myself for an afternoon of cybers. This changes the plan somewhat.
Hmmm. A significant report on the threat of the cybers? That’s gonna need Cyber PM Crusader Rabbit and… how many flags?
That ACSC report will be released today, it says. That’d be the one Maj Gen Steve Day mentioned a few weeks back. zdnet.com/article/austra…
“Spies warn: we’re under cyber attack as hacking costs $1bn”, writes @CroweDM, so @australian got the ACSC report. theaustralian.com.au/national-affai…
@SnarkyPlatypus You could build it out of Minecraft, apparently.
“The Onion’s New Vice Parody Kidney Punches You With News” wired.com/2015/07/onion-… wired.com/2015/07/onion-…
So Brinks’ new smart CompuSafe Galileo safes have a USB port, and… well, you know how this endswired.com/2015/07/brinks…jT
@JohnBirmingham The other day a rugby player explained how the Prime Minister could keep your fingers warm. Or something.
“Uber Is Faking Us Out With ‘Ghost Cabs’ on Its Passenger Map,” surprising no-one. “It’s just a screen saver.” Uhuh. gizmodo.com/uber-is-faking…
Wherever you are right now, @andrewjcrook, kill everyone, burn the buildings to the ground, and salt the earth. twitter.com/andrewjcrook/s…
Indeed, @kkfox78 @Marc_IRL @wolfcat @19bk69, it’s such glorious idiocy. Topday’s word, @Flipboard @Minecraft, is “schadenfreude”.
Sigh. @Flipboard, that’s the Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe in Berlin. So rethink the @Minecraft campaign? en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memorial_…

Just in case @Flipboard tries to delete their “@Minecraft resource” arsehattery, here’s a screenshot. pic.twitter.com/gje7EvfLY5
So, um, @Flipboard, this is a “@Minecraft resource”, you say? Or do you mean “Mein Kraft”? You arsehats. twitter.com/Flipboard/stat…
Wed plan, draft: Produce “The 9pm Edict” podcast (part-done); @5at5daily, maybe; deal with a number of annoying loose ends.
@timpoliti No, toads don’t eat custard.
@timpoliti See? They ARE watching.
I’ll review what happened on the @Pozible campaign overnight once my coffee has started to take hold.
@SnarkyPlatypus @sylmobile Nine days. It ends next Thursday 6 August at 2100 AEST. Previous campaigns were 7 and 10 days.
@sylmobile Yes. Without getting over-confident, I think that Target Two might also be possible to achieve. Which opens up possibilities.
In a hurry? “The 9pm Urgent Hardware Refresh, Day 1” is a brief video explainer. pozible.com/edict2 youtube.com/watch?v=QrCsVs…

“The 9pm Urgent Hardware Refresh”, a @Pozible campaign, launched last night. It’s now at 18%. pozible.com/edict2 pic.twitter.com/o20LMvBfIz
Wednesday. You though They might have forgotten you, right? Hah. You are a fool. They have been Watching, as always. Wednesday.