Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

October 15th, 2016

Also, Bernard Salt’s buttocks. (Another good band name, that.)

via TweetDeck in reply to stilgherrian

Milk crates as intergenerational warfare. twitter.com/swearyanthony/…

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Robbie Swan is a “war horse”? Be nice, @ABCNews24.

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This must all be a great mystery to anyone who doesn’t know the Hare-Clark system. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Single_tr…

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WHO IS THIS MAN AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH HIS NECK. pic.twitter.com/hIjf4XukSJ

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Seriously, the ACT elections are only half a step up from voting on the lunch room dishwashing roster.

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IS IT A SWING OR IS IT A PIVOT MAKE UP YOUR MIND @ABCNews24.

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@SnarkyPlatypus I am concerned that @johnmcternan seems to be speaking out against haggis. I hope I’m mistaken.

via Twitter Web Client in reply to SnarkyPlatypus

Apparently the 3rd Saturday in October is “reserved every four weeks for ACT elections”, according to @ABCNews24, which seems extravagant.

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SHUT UP YOU GODDAM SLUT POSSUMS.

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@gpdawson @corduroy Wait, what? That’s nothing to do with me. I am not @deptofaustralia.

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I WANT TO HEAR MORE ABOUT THE TRAM.

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@corduroy Interesting question. Perhaps it’s about “brand” (yes I know).

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@damonism Goddam government, enforcing democracy.

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Yes, @ABCNews24, please tell this commentator that it’s “a hard row to hoe”, unless the eggcorn is deliberate.

via TweetDeck in reply to stilgherrian

“A hard road to hoe!” (Wait, what?)

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@corduroy No more than a band or a TV show can have a verified account.

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@Mesut_Ausil Look I’m sure it is. Polish Clubs are usually quite good.

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God you could do a Card Against Canberra card deck so easily.

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“Rusted-on Labor voters”!

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“It’a positively raucous here at the Polish Club”!

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@NuclearAnthro The Australian Capital Territory (ACT) has its local election today. It’s not even a state. It’s rubbish.

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How many elected legislators does Canberra need? Why does it need any?

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These are not real places.

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“In the Corflute War our ground game was extraordinary.”

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“We get a lot of love out on the streets of Brindabella,” [Makes note.]

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@davpope So basically I’m an idiot.

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Thank you for this important update on Jeremy Paxman’s sense of self, whoever he is. twitter.com/GuardianAus/st…

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LIVE CROSS TO WODEN I DON’T KNOW IF I CAN CONTAIN MY EXCITEMENT.

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Good God why am I watching this?

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HLMenckenBot The men the American people admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars

via MenckenBot (retweeted on 7:05 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

Latest @ABCNews24 headlines: MDMA, exploding phones, a surfer.

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Oh. Unions guy not Labor party guy. Let me get a microscope to perceive the difference.

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Labor party guy says voters support Labor party policies. Yeah thanks for that.

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Oh I’d forgotten than Canberra has Tram Feels.

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I have turned this on and I feel terrible. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…

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charles_gaba PRESENTING THE NEW OFFICIAL LOGO OF THE REPUBLICAN PARTY: pic.twitter.com/wvSq1BfKDW

via Twitter for iPad (retweeted on 6:13 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@davpope I hadn’t see that one. Lovely.

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davpope Let the counting begin! (cartoon from 2012) pic.twitter.com/VFAG1Kx9Gv

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 6:07 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

And I thought I’d washed carefully… twitter.com/GizmodoAU/stat…

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If you don’t mind it being an election for some place called “ACT”, you can get your @AntonyGreenABC fix on @ABCNews24 tonight.

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Oh THAT @MartinShkreli. What a cunt.

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VirginAustralia From tomorrow, Samsung Galaxy Note 7 devices can no longer be carried on Virgin Australia flights. More here: virg.co/b59H7

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 5:49 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@SnarkyPlatypus The Place of Duck is a quiet achiever in a number of ways.

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Schooners of Young Henry’s Real Ale for $4.50 was not a mistake. It is the current price here.

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@SnarkyPlatypus What you can’t see is the steamed greens they rest on, and the soy, and the sesame seeds. The Duck People do good dumplings.

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@NuclearAnthro @munin Oh man the dumplings would not survive the journey. No freezing here. These are fresh, fresh dumplings.

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Here, @munin, are some previous photos of said dumplings. pic.twitter.com/RHUQt2Fe6v

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@munin They were steamed pork dumplings by these Malaysian-Australian locals and they were, as usual, very good.

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I have been dumplinged.

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peterjblack “Uber’s ad-toting drones are heckling drivers stuck in traffic” pjblack.me/2e1AqIH pic.twitter.com/fPvnYD0Tl0

via Buffer (retweeted on 5:29 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@k_morrissey @semibogan No need to explain the joke there’s a good chap.

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My dumplings have arrived.

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semibogan 😢😢😢 pic.twitter.com/V9DiC24qbh

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 5:22 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

brianwisti I AM A PROGRAMMER

I WILL NOT FIX YOUR COMPUTER

TBH ITS PROBABLY MY FAULT IT BROKE

SORRY

THE CODE WAS CONFUSING

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 5:16 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@Mesut_Ausil You must’ve gone somewhere terrible.

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I seem to have encountered some sort of happy hour. Schooners of Young Henry’s Real Ale for $4.50? Unless it was a mistake.

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WeWantPlates This? Oh, it’s just an orthodontic mould of the restaurant-owner’s mouth from Barcelona.
(Pic: @chris_mandle) pic.twitter.com/ligfCJFuvr

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 5:04 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

deptofaustralia On this day in 1973, Bruce Thickey became the first Australian to walk on the Moon. An unprecedented achievement fo..twitter.com/i/web/status/7…LZ

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 5:03 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

AOCarr I’m just going to assume this is the history of New Zealand as told by a penguin twitter.com/samuelfinch/st…

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 4:59 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

whiteswine Spare a thought for poor Chris Uhlmann.

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 4:58 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

“8am … where four men and a woman were found in a distressed state, swimming in a canal, suffering hallucinations” abc.net.au/news/2016-10-1…

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feed_the_chooks @MattCowgill mate Bernard Salt’s been traded to the Eagles

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 4:50 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

One sign of a good barman: The slightest eye contact and nod from the other side of the room, and your drink is at the bar before you are.

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tobiasziegler is it on twitter.com/TonyAbbottMHR/…

via Tweetbot for iΟS (retweeted on 4:37 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

Cartoon4sale Make America Grope again by Victor Juhasz - political cartoon gallery pic.twitter.com/hT5bKrG2aX

via Twitter for iPad (retweeted on 4:36 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

radtoria My cat learned he could scoop up food with his cone and stole my damn taco when I wasn’t looking 🌮 pic.twitter.com/R75ZNR8QE0

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 4:35 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

Qantas QANTAS GROUP STATEMENT ON SAMSUNG GALAXY NOTE 7 - TOTAL BAN qantasnewsroom.com.au/featured/qanta…

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 4:26 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

barryap1 I don’t read German, what does this say, is it good pic.twitter.com/203KW6Wd5N

via Twitter for Mac (retweeted on 4:22 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@realCoreyEngel @deptofaustralia @peta As former PM Malcolm Fraser said, “Life wasn’t meant to be easy”. en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Malcolm_F…

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@realCoreyEngel @deptofaustralia @peta You really need to bleed them and freeze them live to get the traditional taste, though.

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deptofaustralia It’s a good time to remove your koala from the freezer for Sunday brunch. Share your tips on preparing our national..twitter.com/i/web/status/7…Yb

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 4:00 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

GordyPls wtf pic.twitter.com/USXWYKF1xx

via Tweetbot for Mac (retweeted on 3:56 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

Prof Desmond Ball, one of Australia’s most influential defence and strategic policy experts, passed on Wednesday. anu.edu.au/news/all-news/…

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KeithOlbermann How can it still be “bizarre” when it began in June 2015? twitter.com/politico/statu…

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 3:30 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

“Troopers: Man on LSD saves dog from imaginary fire” wnyt.com/news/michael-o… HT @whassaname

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Are they called “cub reporters” because they turn into bears?

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natecochrane Wise word to cub reporters: Don’t report outside your beat or beyond your subject-matter expertise & you’re less li..twitter.com/i/web/status/7…48

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 3:06 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@z3ndrag0n Depends. Statutory consumer warranties under ACL are two years, despite what many manufacturers try to get away with.

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@RubyMolteno There is no way I’d go to Hornsby without visiting the Famous Hornsby Fountain.

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@juhasaarinen And you also looked like a regional bank manager.

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@ericscheid Couldn’t tell you, sorry. I’ve only used Belkin for an iPhone cable. It did the job.

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david_rees Thank you for posting this totally legitimate invoice from the Clinton Foundation. My friends and I enjoy looking a..twitter.com/i/web/status/7…Oe

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 2:32 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@fivewalls @zackster Are we still talking about cables?

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Meanwhile, I’d like to thank* everyone for their helpful* comments relating to cable care and Apple’s business models.

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An expedition to Hornsby on Tuesday should be fun, anyway.

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Genius Bars are always booked solid after school holidays and during school exam times.

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Given a choice of relatively prompt Genius Bar appointments in Newcastle, Wollongong, Bathurst, and Hornsby, I choose Hornsby.

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@fivewalls @zackster Meh. I’m covered, I’ll just get a new one.

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MichaelRoddan Yesterday we must have made about 200-odd phone calls to make this yarn happen — Westpac Revealed As Rouge Insurer..twitter.com/i/web/status/7…Du

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 2:20 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

johnpodesta 3. I bet the lobster risotto is better than the food at the Ecuadorian Embassy. pic.twitter.com/zyViu1R4UL

via TweetDeck (retweeted on 2:19 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@FakeDanTosello Cyberpossums could be a bad move, long term.

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@michaelmeloni Yeah it took them a while, but it’s a routine replacement now.

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@soundscaper I do a LOT of moving around. They never last longer than this. Apple swaps them without drama.

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@zackster Under ACL I think it has to replaced if it’s under two years, but I always get AppleCare anyway to deal with things out further/.

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patstokes Not many people know this was the original closing line from The Grapes of Wrath: twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 2:02 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

One day Apple will figure out how to make one of these that lasts longer than 15 months. pic.twitter.com/YuS8YxU9oj

via Twitter for iPhone

kenli729 Peasant minstrel twitter.com/DPRK_News/stat…

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 1:58 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@feed_the_chooks Only if they’re working for the Trump campaign.

via TweetDeck in reply to feed_the_chooks

The possums are having sex in the ceiling again. And with a Full Moon tomorrow night it’s only going to get worse.

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RealSexyCyborg Seen today. Yes, that is an Internet enabled PC for dogs. @internetofshit pic.twitter.com/Hi85nwY9eW

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 1:47 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

CerealVelocity How to sell a smartphone:

2015
• 4GB RAM
• QHD display

2016
• 3.5mm headphone jack
• Doesn’t explode

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 1:47 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

@Steve_Lockstep @kcarruthers A cybercrat sounds like someone from Brussels.

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@kcarruthers They let anyone do the cybers these days.

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davpope Exit polling at Tidbinbilla pic.twitter.com/Md7ZfQ493V

via Twitter for Android (retweeted on 1:22 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

PWTooStrong Trying to imagine the series of bad developer decisions that led to this Azure Active Directory password policy… pic.twitter.com/3vzjV4ZNDD

via Link account with KUKU.io (retweeted on 1:20 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

TriciaLockwood so apparently “beautiful caucasian baby chef cooking itself in a pot” is a stock photo category pic.twitter.com/X8BmTBBtYb

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 1:19 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via Twitter Web Client)

Well this will be interesting… twitter.com/USTreasury/sta…

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@AussiemacJ I understand your strategy, but not al would agree.

via TweetDeck in reply to AussiemacJ

@michaelneale @SnarkyPlatypus Would you believe it started as a joke, but they discovered a real demand. military1st.co.uk/clothing-kilts/

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Is it time for pants yet?

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@paulkidd @bkjabour Are you helping, Paul? I don’t think you’re helping.

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Oh yeah I tweeted this earlier but I’m still laughing at the level of special-snowflake sulkage. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…

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Another plug: I’m helping @latrobe doing some free night-time cybers on Wed 26 Oct. latrobe.edu.au/events/all/big…

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bkjabour How many people thought this was an okay idea before it arrived on my desk as a piece of PR pic.twitter.com/7tH37yyqsS

via Twitter for iPhone (retweeted on 12:55 PM, Oct 15th, 2016 via TweetDeck)

… when these are so much more reliable? (2/2pic.twitter.com/7pC3I6kVLQLQ

via TweetDeck in reply to stilgherrian

Why does a hospital need a “celebrity ambassador…” (1/2twitter.com/whereisdaz/sta…ZU

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Just assume they’re Nazis and work back from there.

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@ivovic Which is fair enough. Also, the alleged “joke” was terrible.

via Tweetbot for iΟS in reply to ivovic

SangHeeFLee Archaeologist: “First Humans Used Primitive Samsungs To Start Fires” aboveaverage.com/archaeologist-… via @AboveAverage

via Twitter Web Client (retweeted on 8:42 AM, Oct 15th, 2016 via Tweetbot for iΟS)

First failure for the day. I’m on a roll already.

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@ivovic There was a kind of pun in there, you’re. Sort of an anatomical one. Sadly not funny enough.

via Tweetbot for iΟS in reply to ivovic

@SnarkyPlatypus It’s too early to say. Once there has been coffee then a proper assessment may be possible. Et vous?

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Saturday. It’s like a big concrete cylinder, except it’s not concrete. Saturday.

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