Stilgherrian (@stilgherrian)

Wentworth Falls NSW AU

The below is an off-site archive of all tweets posted by @stilgherrian ever

April 28th, 2010

RT @jasonlangenauer: I am disappointed by the apparent lack of interest in .

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RT @renailemay: LOL I am about to publish an article from @iDarryl using the word “enema” [Mate, want me to better that? Piss easy!]

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Oh @sylmobile now THAT is a suitable change for … !

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I fear that will never be as popular as http://bit.ly/17vaH7

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That is going viral at the ABC is an example of everything that is wrong with our national broadcaster, @garykemble

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Well earlier I was thinking about jelly wrestling, @jonoabroad, so ponder a @LaurieOakes and Christopher Pyne match!

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Yes @sonieee it was classic ambulance-chaser lawyer stuff. Afternoon radio has ALL the best advertising! WS-FM FTW!

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RT @LaurieOakes: Abbott says Rudd “has gutlessed out”. Abbot has grammared out. [Sorry, Laurie, stick with politics not linguistics.]

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I just heard an advert on the radio for compensation lawyers which came SO close to saying they’d always win. Classy.

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Does anyone care that “Cats” is returning to Sydney “for three weeks only”? No, me neither.

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I just thought of another good kitten joke but I’m on the wrong side of this whole argument to use it. Consistency FTL.

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Oh now @erkpod Humpr is an AWESOME app name!

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You know, there’s a little part of me which thinks that publicly berating my editors is not necessarily a strategy for success… [shrugs]

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I was dumped for WORLD CHAMPION CHESS? http://is.gd/bKS8w There’s another six fucked kittens right there!

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Did I mention that on the weekend I thought up an iPhone app like Grindr, but even moar betteror?

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We’ve a LONG way to go before is a trend, @Debichan!

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Oh. Hang on. No-one reads Twitter, do they?

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Christ, @gabewong, I don’t want my clients at my birthday party! Having half my bloody so-called friends there will be burden enough!

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“I speak not merely of that malignant tumour on the face of Australian policy debate, The Australian” http://bit.ly/beFuxS Oh @BernardKeane!

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Just so you know, @sophblack and @thetowncrier support the torture of kittens.

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Decisions decisions… Do something of value for a client? Or plan my birthday party?

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Dear North Americans, a decade+ back a local cable TV news channel did without a news set, just shot from reporters’ desks. Who was it?

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“Virgin sale”?

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Well let’s just hope, @jasonlangenauer, that enough people support

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RT @todayspolitics: Jon Stewart: Arizona is the meth lab of democracy http://bit.ly/aH3P2m HT @KteeJ

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@jasonlangenauer Where does a tapeworm grow a moustache, exactly?

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Reality does indeed suck, @Nickhodge @Yin_Izanami which is why I prefer surreality. Addictions also help, I’m told.

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Mobile: Enmore Rd; lunch; local errands, possibly as far afield as King St.

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Getting up someone’s nose, apparently. There’s a surprise.

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Is that a suggestion for this afternoon, @SnarkyPlatypus?

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Wondering whether subsequent tweets should continue further along this downhill path or not.

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Women’s minister Tanya Plibersek and her shadow Sharman Stone, you say @jamesmassola? Can my question involve jelly wrestling?

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Thanks @benbarberhays I’m not negative for the sake of it. I genuinely question the increasing artifice and gimmickry of TV news.

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Creativity, why do you elude me today? Must I continue reading disturbing feature articles instead?

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I’ve just given my opinion of the ABC News 24 set. It’s not positive. http://bit.ly/d7hB4y

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Hey @abcnews, the US Senate has its own firing squads now, eh? http://bit.ly/c116il Idiot hyperbole FTL.

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Persecution of those seeking to consume content on their own terms has a long, long history. http://bit.ly/ddOVsZ)

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Young people do more things with sexual connotations than middle-aged politicians. Who knew? http://bit.ly/cNLJTJ

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It appears that “raunch culture” originates in this book http://bit.ly/a8Emlw @chrisberg @NewtonMark Appears to be modish pop-feminism.

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Advice for everyone using Twitter: http://bit.ly/bKJjzk

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Advice for freelance writers: You get to write more stuff for money if you pitch stories more often.

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@simontsmall Crikey work varies according to, well, how often I pitch stories. Long-term average is more than weekly. http://bit.ly/fTcQ1

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Not quite emerges.

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I’m not sure this is working.

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You can’t argue with this kind of prophecy. http://bit.ly/aSSQqS HT @Nickhodge

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@megpickard WTF is a “usability theatre”? And does it hurt?

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Is Thailand Going the Way of 1936 Spain? http://bit.ly/dgavPA HT @Colvinius Ping @ApostrophePong

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Being harrassed by anonymous passive-aggressive tweets.

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It appears that is a failure, and so am I.

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I think I might have to leave the SEO conversation until the morning. The cats are far more interested in Full Moon activities.

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My batteries are failing, even the spare ones. I shall now head home and continue the cuntery from there.

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The BIG SEKRIT in this release is that if you’re a big global company and spend shitloads on advertising then people will have heard of you.

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“You have been sent this email as you have indicated an interest in receiving material on this subject.” No I didn’t.

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“Our research shows brand has become increasingly important to Australian consumers” is another amazing SEKRIT.

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“Use of social media was a key trend across many of the successful brands this year,” that’s a SEKRIT apparently.

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Exactly @renailemay @imtimhanlon! SEO is about making your website work for some idiot machine rather than your customers. Arsehats.

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I wouldn’t soil my website with this bullshit.

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RT @adavid: If you break the embargo, that means they never send you a release again. Downside is? [Precisely.]

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No @NewtonMark @PointZeroOne it’s just “World’s Most Valuable Brands”. Like who gives a fuck?

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Like the world will implode if the meejuh says “Strong brands prove their resilience to economic downturn” in the next 70 minutes.

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Giggles! Just got emailed “EMBARGOED Media Release NOT FOR PUBLICATION BEFORE 6pm AEST” and it’s just some lame corporate pimpage. Losers.

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“45 years of hits live with Glenn Shorrock at the State Theatre”? Kill me. Kill me now.

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RT @grantshow: I love fucking mouse pads! [Well each to their own, I suppose. And they’re easy to clean.]

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Well, @BradDeLuca, I’d categorise that story with “Sun rises in East”.

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RT @BradDeLuca: What about if the story went: “a spokesperson today said if you sign up to Facebook you forego the right to privacy”?

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RT @latikambourke Who is your favourite Australian politician and why? Best answer gets a Workchoices mousepad (sadly not signed by Gillard)

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RT @jasonjordan: Some mad woman keeps smsing me. Any tips on how to deal with it? ;-) [File for divorce? [ducks]]

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You know, I really can’t see any news story with “Facebook” and “privacy” in the same sentence without laughing my head off.

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Oh well played @iDarryl! “Five reasons the iPad needs to succeed in Australia” http://bit.ly/9DLyvH

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RT @garthk: Which is less toxic? My view project referring to my view model project, or vice versa? [What does this even mean?]

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I am listening to WS-FM, @zerogeewhiz, because it’s coming p0ut of a speaker nearby. And one does need to stay in touch with the proles.

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On WS-FM, Jonno and Danno spend too much time on really obvious jokes about the death of the 3.5” floppy.

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Still sneezing.

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“Grindr’s coffee”? WTF?

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Erm, not that I’m drinking. Shoosh.

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Red wine makes me sneeze.

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At this point I should probably mention that my tweets are not necessarily professional advice.

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Cocaine, @grantshow. Cocaine is the answer to all your problems. Apparently.

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I suspect this is not historically accurate http://bit.ly/c8vBjc HT @rod3000

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Oh yes, @Reemski, Dali AND a kitten!

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“Wil Anderson and Robert de Castella join Robbo and Danno”, they said. Gawd, I… can… hardly… wait… [thud]

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I’ll get back to you on who might be a good example, @simontsmall, ‘cos I have to pretend to start writing now. ;)

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Any potential editors reading my last tweet should insert the word “be” where appropriate, and be reassured that I can write grammatically.

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Yes, my previous tweet also implies that I’d happy to receive commissions from editors… ;)

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But all that said @simontsmall I’m not a good example. I’d get a LOT morre writing gigs if I pulled my finger out and pitched more.

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Well @simontsmall my own blog doesn’t pay. ;) I choose who to pitch a story to on gut feeling for likelihood for success.

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Thu plan: Morning Crikeywriting; audio edits; afternoon other writing, probably; evening gym & dinner w@SnarkyPlatypusypus, probably.

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Nope @glengyron I can’t remember the US/CA TV station that dumped news sets entirely. It was early 1990s so falls into the pre-web gap.

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I’ll add that line to my bio. Goes nicely with having written the most unworthy article Crikey has ever published” http://bit.ly/byRJax

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RT @BernardKeane: “If complaining on the internet was an Olympic sport you would get a gold medal.” Well that’s you pwned. [So true.]

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Astounded at the level of personal abuse Stanley is giving me over my ABC News 24 set design comments. http://bit.ly/9tu52T

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Well @BaneAu the best pitch is the one in the form the editor prefers. Just ask! Being sarcastic only seems to work for Crikey.

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Gosh @BaneAu for short news/comment pieces the pitch is just a few sentences outlining what you’d write. I can send, but not much use?

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