So this Singularity Summit isn’t the only one? How does that…?
Instructions received instagr.am/p/OTi7nhiFuX/
Observing the Deployment of the Lettuce of Justification. As well as the subsequent stains on clothing.
@NewtonMark Later up I’ll give you the lecture about available items, working machines and casflows, you clueless n00b.
Being besmirched.
I see @MylesPeterson is tweeting some choice extracts with links.
So with all the tinfoil screeching about #NatSecInquiry hypotheticals, are you across the real cybercrime bill in the Senate tomorrow?
Transit instagr.am/p/OTWbN2CFqk/
Yeah, I’d sit next to those kids on a plane, what with those shorts.
No respect.
Disgruntled.
tapbot_paul This is what the guy who is in charge of the Android UI dresses like. A lot of things are suddenly making sense.
images.scribblelive.com/2011/10/18/1a3…
“Dick Smith flares up”? I’m pretty sure Valtrex can fix that.
DO WHAT IT SAYS instagr.am/p/OTLSNhCFne/
Loose.
Crypto-facists are allowed to mix metaphors without restraint. It’s in the rules.
“WILD JUGGERNAUT!”
Hah! Love this CIS event title. “Can we tame the welfare juggernaut?” Not that you’d want to pre-frame the debate or anything…
I wish that annoying creature would hurry up I mean it’s not like all that pointless corporate shit won’t still be there tomorrow.
@RealNickHodge Have you ever read the “dress code” for @VirginAustralia? “Thongs are acceptable”, it says. NO THEY ARE FUCKING WELL NOT.
@julieposetti I think that “jail” is probably better for anything you plan on writing this century. @SnarkyPlatypus
That sort of thing?
If you go to the pool there will be other men in not very much clothing.
There must be a time zone thing in Dallas.
I have just seriously been offered a flight SFO-DFW (5.5h) then DFW-SYD (about 3 days, then swim).
@SnarkyPlatypus @julieposetti @stinginthetail We’ve already been through this “gaol” arsehattery, haven’t we @en_gy? stilgherrian.com/language/presc…
I wonder how many MPs actually understand that their JOB is to scrutinise legislation anTHUD OI FUCK NO STOP HITTING ME OUCH.
RT @poisontofu: If your computer is not running slow enough today, you can always give spinningbeachballofdeath.com a whirl. (cc @clintonduncan)
Stop it you two.
I should stop talking to pentesters. Except that hot one.
@willhughes Right. So change contact address and get them to mail out a list of claims. Can has medical records nao? This is basic stuff.
So, Park St folk, the thing about THE FUCKING LOUD SIREN on THE FUCKING BIG FIRE TRUCK is you don’t try to cross the road in front of it.
As far as I understand it, @jonoabroad, eHealth records are what let anyone look up the STD results of politicians from their home PC.
RT @benpobjie: Gays reproduce by funding public schools
So from 1 July we’ve all been ready to rock’n’roll with eHealth records, right @nibhealthfunds? I. Want. To. Cry. Now.
RT @chrisbrownie: the best part was they don’t give a “invalid characters”, they just give a “too long or too short” warning. [Jesus wept.]
RT @SarahWiley8: Abbott now says he’s not sayng that any member of parliament has blood on his or her hands [Get it in writing, Sarah.]
Also, can a lawyer give me a quick refresher on the law of incitement? Asking for a friend.
Poor Renae.
It would be illegal and unethical to offer a beer to the first person to password-hack @nibhealthfunds so, you know, no beer for you.
BEAM ME UP NOW, SCOTTIE, I’VE SEEN ENOUGH OF THIS PLANET! (Unless there’s more of them easy alien chicks to root.)
@nibhealthfunds Good thing you’re not in an industry with strong security needs like health or finance or… oh wait. @chrisbrownie @mukimu
@nibhealthfunds HAHAHAHA! “Our system deliberately prevents strong passwords because we don’t need strong passwords.” @chrisbrownie @mukimu
nibhealthfunds @chrisbrownie As our security system doesn’t require these additional characters they are not included as options for passwords. Renea
That’s typical. While we’re busy screeching about how long refugees should be in concentration camps, another ill-scrutinised crime bill.
@BernardKeane That’s the Cybercrime Legislation Amendment Bill 2011, which still doesn’t stop info export to death-penalty countries?
BernardKeane For those unaware, govt wants to get the #cybercrime bill passed this session; it is scheduled for the Senate tomorrow: is.gd/AO0HCh
THANK YOU @jeamland THIS CAN BE USED TO REPLACE @mpesce AND THE ENTIRETY OF THIS WEEK’S PODCAST! whatthefuckismymashup.com
courteneyh there’s batshittery in the air this afternoon. can everyone please take a deep breath & calm down? you’re freaking me out a bit.
Possibly my concept of “helping” needs refinement.
So is “abraxas” the Greek word for “forced sodomy” or what? (There, Anonymous, don’t say I don’t ever help.)
From the context of the request I got, @semiboganman, I’m thinking .au and .nz and .hm but YMMV.
@jeamland @crikey_news HAMSTER BENDER! HAMSTER BENDER! HAMSTER BENDER! HAMSTER BENDER! HAMSTER BENDER! HAMSTER BENDER! HAMSTER BENDER!
Paxochka I’m a little scared to have laser bikini line removal because one small slip and my clitoris may become my superpower.
Any infosec types know of an existing reasonably complete calendar of infosec-related events? OR MUST I GET OUT THE WHIP AGAIN?
I’ve just been trolled by an unknown journalist at @amworldtodaypm. I’LL GET YOU!
Do I need to email you my rate card?
I have just been informed that I shall not be required for television today, so MOAR BEER.
OH: “The Wi-Fi guy didn’t come, did he?” Wait. And three huge TV screens were just delivered too. What was that SSID again…?
Yeah this media release is really going to cut through. prweb.com/releases/2012/… HT @ioerror
@bernietb Only the first six words of your tweet are needed there.
RT @semiboganman: Jimojo is totally a honeypot… [Judging by the comments that turn up when you search, yes. Kinda.]
Free Wi-Fi no password yeah sure maybe OK no instagr.am/p/OS4KZwiFv0/
@NewtonMark I presume the ACCC assumes “investment” means “profit”, in some narrow meaning. Like the government investing in our children.
NewtonMark I think this means that innovation in funding models is not welcome in Australia. Run crowdfunding offshore instead. arseh.at/1vds
Tue plan, updated: 1345 pre-record @phildobbie radio spot; record TV spot?; check in; write, write, write and/or drink beer; dinner and so.
According to @whiteswine @jennylmackinnon @corduroy @purserj, outsourcing is the key, @SisterMorphine.
@j_hutch That looks more like @rosbates gave approval over lunch for all those tweets to be tweeted. Then copy. Then paste.
Is the Australian Government slowly waking up to the realisation that running concentration camps isn’t such a good look?
@SnarkyPlatypus Racist.
@fat_asian Look, my opinions ARE your facts.
Weighing up competing requests from commissioning editors and TV journalists, NONE OF WHICH SEEM TO INCLUDE LEAVING ME DRINK MY BEER.
RT @triple5adam: IBM Security Symposium 2012 speakers & presentations #IBMSecSym2012 www-07.ibm.com/events/au/secu…
Everything is factual.
Nippon Club.
Brunch. #IBMSecSym2012
Apparently you can trust IBM because they’ve been “Sarbanes–Oxley’d up the wazoo”#IBMSecSym201212
Surprised that @mjohnson said Apple wouldn’t admit a security vulnerability? cso.com.au/article/425539… #IBMSecSym2012
Audience member talks about “Amazon threatening to build an Australian data centre”. Threatening? #IBMSecSym2012
So @jturner_ibrs just said “Cloud is a scale play” and he wasn’t even struck by lightning or anything. #IBMSecSym2012
RT @SnarkyPlatypus: I think the word “social” has now reached the meaningless prefix stage of its use. [Um, welcome to 2011.]
@darrenpauli Is that anything like that politician they call “The Mattress”?
This may be cruel, but I get the feeling this preso is 1. you need a policy people understand 2. Tivoli. #IBMSecSym2012
RT @danielstone: @stilgherrian COMMA COMMA COMMA COMMALEON [/cc @dobes]
@jeamland On the other hand… flickr.com/photos/stilghe…
Commas are filth.
RT @jeamland: Does it involve chains and padlocks? [It seems to involve, grey hair, beards and pacing.]
SnarkyPlatypus Yes, the trend of showing confusing infographics and associating it with policy depth is somewhat bemusing.
Next up, Matthew Johnson, senior technical staff member, Office of the IBM CIO, on securing mobile devices. #IBMSecSym2012
I am wearing pants, yes.
I often feel like I’m underdressed for these events, and maybe didn’t get enough sleep. And then @darrenpauli arrives. #IBMSecSym2012
RT @triple5adam: Guy … just rocked up with a netbook with sticker that says ‘Do Epic Shit’ lulz #IBMSecSym2012 [That’d be @darrenpauli.]
Next up, Det Supt Brad Marden, Cyber Crime Operations, Aust Federal Police. #IBMSecSym2012
@iain_chalmers @SnarkyPlatypus Why aren’t those children helping out our vital mining industry with its labour shortage problem?
Something something holding Julie Andrews over a barrel what? #IBMSecSym2012
The cloud needs more barrels, to hold people over, says @jturner_ibrs and I am not trolling. #IBMSecSym2012
So @jturner_ibrs is explaining the role of DSD using a photograph of Julie Andrews from “The Sound of Music”. I’m there. #IBMSecSym2012
@0x1C I am confused and a little excited.
@leslienassar She’s Russian, just got sentenced to 40 years, was using the Zeus anti-banking malware toolkit. #IBMSecSym2012
RT @SnarkyPlatypus: There are adults sitting next to children on the train. How is this even allowed?
Michael Montecillo explains the hacker threat #IBMSecSym2012 instagr.am/p/OSVBEWCFl9/
MM: Scanned Fortune 500 plus 178 popular websites, 40% had client-side JavaScript vulnerabilities. Usually 3rd-party code. #IBMSecSym2012
Vulnerability counts are down from last year? So are we counting Android in its entirety as “1”? #IBMSecSym2012
So many muffins, so little time.
Did I mention second breakfast? #IBMSecSym2012
March/April 2011, SQLSlammer attacks suddenly dropped. Did a good guy hacker clean up the systems doing the attacks? #IBMSecSym2012
MM: “Commercial malware kits are a huge problem that most organisations are not equipped to deal with.” #IBMSecSym2012
@commuter_dirge @intrepidfear @techAU @corduroy Thanks, guys. And of course it’s now just finished reindexing after the drive anyway. Sigh.
So the fact that my Android phone just randomly rebooted itself is completely coincidental, right? #IBMSecSym2012
Mr Montecillo’s bio: “Hacking and stuff”. #IBMSecSym2012
Next up, Michael Montecillo, IBM Security Services Threat Research and Intelligence Principal. #IBMSecSym2012
IBM in Chains #IBMSecSym2012 instagr.am/p/OSRwgYCFjs/
Still trying to cope with infosec people with suntans, but then IBM’s lab is on the Gold Coast. It’s still a little creepy. #IBMSecSym2012
davecl42 Q. How many copy editors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Do you mean replace or have sex in? Please clarify.
Dear OS X experts, is there a way to stop Spotlight reindexing while I’m on battery?
Glen Gooding, Dir Institute for Advanced Security, IBM AP, giving an overview of IBM strategy, most of which is familiar. #IBMSecSym2012
@DDrazic But I certainly agree that what I learn about security itself happens elsewhere. You’re not the audience for this. ;)
@DDrazic Part of what I do is decode and comment upon corporate messaging about security. It’s what most people see, not technical facts.
IBM is claiming to have coined BYOD for bring your own device “about five years ago”. Bold. #IBMSecSym2012
There is theming … #IBMSecSym (IBM Sex Symbol?) instagr.am/p/OSNcovCFve/
Crane of Justice instagr.am/p/OSKiGmiFs6/
Well that’s certainly five-star perkiness!
Mobile: Checking out; walk to The Mint, 10 Macquarie St; 0800 IBM Security Symposium #IBMSecSym2012 (“Symposium” is more wank than “cloud”.)
RT @mpesce RT @nytimes: Helen Gurley Brown “was 90, though parts of her were considerably younger.” The NYT obituary: nyti.ms/NvyeXd
@intrepidfear Yes, that conveys the essential concepts of what is unfolding here. @SnarkyPlatypus
@SnarkyPlatypus La croisière est interracial. Le petit déjeuner buffet un peu moins. Cinq étoiles.
@SnarkyPlatypus Bonjour. Je suis intrigué par la croisière interracial à la barre de petit déjeuner continental. Et vous?
RT @miss_shiny: @stilgherrian Please tell me you’re just biting things and not using tongs? [Only the staff. Well, one of the staff.]
Now he cruises the fruit buffet like it’s a pickup bar, swaggering as he passes the freshly sliced kiwifruit. A belch ruins the effect.
He chews his breakfast as if it’s the bones of a mortal enemy and he has but five seconds to live. Milk dribbles from one side of his mouth.
I’m sure there’s a word for blokes who wear a leather jacket over a tracksuit hoodie top and expensive jeans.
Anyone who “includes” me in a cheerful, generic “peeps” or, worse, “tweeps” is putting their lives and those of their entire family at risk.
tomewing Weird ‘happy GB’ trope: “people even talked to strangers on the tube”. What kind of heartless extrovert swine actually wants this?
“The policy that helped Anonymous hack AAPT”, by @ssharwood theregister.co.uk/2012/08/07/how…
@jturner_ibrs I approve of your plan and wish to subscribe to your newsletter. #IBMSecSym2012
MollyMcIsaac I’ve never had a problem remembering to take my birth control, because I log in to Facebook every night and see the babies.
I’m fairly sure that’s not what “visceral” means.
Tue plan: 0800 IBM Security Symposium #IBMSecSym2012; lunch (where?); change hotels; afternoon of writing; evening of you butt right out.
Final plug: “Patch Monday” podcast: “The future of business is Lego” (or APIs) with a lot of @mpesce zdnet.com/au/the-future-…
Already there has been a minor victory this morning, and a major curiosity. This bodes well. I think.
Chewsday. And I’m mentally munching already.