I am on an aeroplane and I will talk to you next from Los Angeles. Thank you. instagr.am/p/OxppWqiFt1/
Oops boarding. Walking briskly from Gate 35 back to Gate 9. Shut up.
The #RI over at the gate for that BKK flight is far better.
Dear Sydney Airport, you can buy this photo if you like instagr.am/p/OxkEzsCFpO/
The Future Looks Like This instagr.am/p/Oxj-aACFpJ/
Can someone please post this at internetcafeorurinal.tumblr.com? instagr.am/p/OxjmIEiFo1/
@juhasaarinen @joshgnosis Oh, God no, I met / interviewed Buzz Aldrin some time in the late 1980s.
“Buzz Aldrin’s Official Statement on the Passing of Neil Armstrong” buzzaldrin.com/buzz-aldrins-o…
@SnarkyPlatypus [blinks] Possibly this conversation need not continue in public. I may be well into the cocktails but there are limits.
@SnarkyPlatypus You could be missing something…
@misswired Oh hello! How are things over the other side of the airport? It was full of arsehats earlier, so I’m fleeing to America.
My strategy to turn all my AUD into Bloody Marys seems to be proceeding to plan.
So there’s a Qantas fight to BKK in final boarding. Perhaps if I rush to that gate and talk fast…
@joshgnosis Oh FFS even I’ve shaken Buzz Aldrin’s hand. See my earlier comments. Gillard’s “tribute” is pathetic. Year 7 essay, D- standard.
@stufromoz SO IT’S A LIZARD AIRLINE! Also, the aircraft is named “Goin’ Scootin’”; I’d be embarrassed. @SnarkyPlatypus @josh909 @omgzam
@mediahunter This tweet reveals all, since your scroll bar seems to have died. ;) twitter.com/stilgherrian/s… @SnarkyPlatypus
Lolwut? Scoot is an actual airline? HAHAHAHAHA! instagr.am/p/Oxd0OdiFjX/
Prime Minister Gillard has a special gift: the ability to turn one of the greatest moments in human history into a sequence of drab clichés.
PM’s tribute says “I’ve never forgotten watching that great moment on television,” but then says nothing about the memories. Rather lame.
My reflections on the Moon landing and the Space Age from last year. stilgherrian.com/50-to-50/09/ and stilgherrian.com/50-to-50/09a/ #RIPNeilArmstrong
@SnarkyPlatypus Oh, in my presentation I also used the phrase “… ending speculation as to whether Prince Harry is a natural ranga.”
@NewtonMark @SnarkyPlatypus Actually I’d love to cross the Pacific in a propellor aircraft. Lockheed Constellation, or PBY Catalina.
When political journalists pour a cup of tea, @SnarkyPlatypus, it’s a maelstrom.
RT @SnarkyPlatypus “Swept from power” “Seized power” - who knew Australian elections were so violent?
Sometimes, just sometimes, a lack of celery can be excused instagr.am/p/OxbhPQiFg3/
Clear.
Checked in. Immigration and security next.
People flying with surfboards. #IceMoonPrison
@SnarkyPlatypus So it turns out that I can speak French without the aid of translation software. Three years of high school not wasted.
@SnarkyPlatypus Oh wait.
@SnarkyPlatypus Bonjour. Je ne parle pas Français aujourd’hui, mais je suis très bien. Et vous?
Enqueued. Resisting an almost overwhelming urge to start bleating.
@garystark *makes note to burn down your house when I return from America* @franksting
@firstdogonmoon Please see my earlier comment about poached eggs. Is there a cartoon in famous but wrong poached eggs? #poachedeggwatch
@franksting I’m sick of you now. I’m getting new friends.
@chrisjrn I didn’t book anything because minions. But separate organisations were involved so coordination wasn’t. Because grammar.
Liftoff! instagr.am/p/OxT-c6iFp9/
Idiocy of the T-Bus, Part 2: People.
Idiocy of the T-Bus, Part 1: $5.50 fare, cash only, so impossible for new arrivals and requiring a huge float of small change.
@franksting Move on. You’re living in the past.
Transition: From Domestic to International, with livestock instagr.am/p/OxSrk8iFom/
Oh. That was quick.
Around and around the carousel goes. When will luggage appear? Nobody knows! instagr.am/p/OxSKedCFoC/
Airlinespeak explained #56: “We’re just re-aligning the aerobridge” really means “Shit! We missed!”
Muppet smuggler exposed! instagr.am/p/OxRKujiFm8/
Moving to our assigned position instagr.am/p/OxQ0PWCFmv/
@michaelneale Kinda almost. Railway block signalling is the thing to look up on Wikipedia.
@franksting Surely you’re not suggesting an airliner captain would lie to us?
Thanks, everyone, for the bon voyage messages. I’ve (almost) completed one leg of three.
We touched down 10 mins early, but there’s no gates free. We wait, along with our friend there. instagr.am/p/OxPi-yiFlr/
Taxiing, 22C at 0920… it’s a long, hot summer ahead for Sydney instagr.am/p/OxPFwIiFlN/
Touchdown Sydney.
So, transmitters off, then see you in Sydney, then Los Angeles, then San Francisco.
YES THE SEAT YOU ARE IN IS THE SAME NUMBER AS ON YOUR BOARDING PASS IT IS AN ENORMOUS MISTARY HOW DID WE EVER GET TO THE MOON I DON’T EVEN.
Embraer 190, seat 23D instagr.am/p/OxD2fWCFpP/
Boarding.
This one, and soon instagr.am/p/OxC-HxiFoA/
All the way to infinity… forever instagr.am/p/OxCe2RCFnQ/
@michaelneale There’s a reason I’m happy to go @QantasAirways SYD-LAX-SFO over @united’s direct SYD-SFO. It’s not just the A380s…
@juhasaarinen No, “our nigga” is an expression of respect. Melanin-deficient me has been called “m’nigga” by African-Americans.
@miss_shiny I ate the hockey puck. :(
It’ll be one like this, but not this one instagr.am/p/Ow_w-wiFkz/
It’s time for Buzz Aldrin to finally man up and hand over that cache of papers documenting the moon landing hoax.
What’s the difference between a poached egg and an ice hockey puck? Here, nothing.
The “big breakfast” at Brisbane airport would not be out of place at a pre-dawn servo in Deniliquin.
“My only regret is having missed the last season of ‘MasterChef’”: no-one on their deathbed, ever.
Sunrise over the approach to Brisbane airport instagr.am/p/Ow59pqCFvT/
In the pre-dawn birdsong there are kookaburras, but also at least two other species I’ve never heard before. Delight.
Right. I’m awake. I’m packed. I’m ready for my 27 hours of travel (with intermittent gaps). Here we go, Possums!
Sun plan, timeline: 0500 limo Coolum-BNE; 0800 DJ824 BNE-SYD; 1305 QF11 SYD-LAX; 1230 PDT AA3217 LAX-SFO; check in; 1700 PDT cocktails.
Sun plan: Travel from Qld’s Sunshine Coast (see next tweet) to San Francisco for #VMworld; produce “Patch Monday” podcast; 2 x blog posts.
My luggage shall be collected in about an hour. The limousine is scheduled to collect me at 0500, to drive me to Brisbane airport.
So here we are then. My day of travel has begin. The 0330 alarm has successfully woken me. Now alkaloids shall turn me human.