Gorn.
So I’ve connected a @stripe account to my soon to be not SEKRIT @Pozible project, which I just submitted for review. Tomorrow, possums…
@sylmobile Typographers, subeditors, and anyone who actually knows anything at all about the world beyond manual typewriters.
Taxi driver comes to wrong door of the pub, realises mistake, comes to meet me. “Sorry, thought you were at the bottle shop buying Grange.”
Returning.
Colvinius I don’t know much about wine, but I can’t remember what I like.
OH, TV in front bar: “This driver truck driver tested positive for cannabis and amphetamines.” Barmaid: “Hah! Lucky cunt!”
I seriously need a flight with @theskywhale_ … “The 9pm Skywhale”!

RT @theskywhale_: Another great photo from this morning! pic.twitter.com/zvmMtoh5A2 [Ping @gattaca]

RT @theskywhale_: A photograph from this mornings flight over Melbs. pic.twitter.com/VRqy6joRA3 [Ping @gattaca]
@yinettesys It’s called a “joke”, son. I’m not playing that far down in the stack.
RT @playswithf1re: be sure to use openssl 1.0.1f for maximum security! [Choice of champions, Sir, choice of champions.]
I should probably not configure the crypto for an online payment gateway after this many beers. BUT WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG? YOLO!
@carolduncan So far there are no bullets but a “successful outcome”. All will be revealed tomorrow.
Wow.
Bingo.
No it’s all good, @carolduncan, it’s just that what I want to do on the internet is requiring me to go down a beta-test rabbit hole.
Uhoh.
mattsta Instead of ending emails with “Thanks” I use “You have 48 hours to respond before I contact the authorities.”
@PitcherJenna I will finish your report if you finish my SEKRIT thing.
@PitcherJenna Pop over, I’ll get you an ale.
RT @franksting: I hope you’re declaring who bought the ale [Yes. I bought the ale. Sadly.]
Working on SEKRIT things, with an ale at hand.
5at5daily “5at5 number 36 | 16 April 2014”: UFOs, Tea Party tie-ins, charts and facts, sinking ships, and miscellaneous maps. tinyletter.com/5at5/letters/5…
“Who Has More Hair, Prince George or Prince William? An Investigation” gawker.com/who-has-more-h… Ping @SnarkyPlatypus
RT @oberonsghost: Help fund my overseas trip! Talk to Gladys! #gladysforpremier redbubble.com/people/oberons… [Hah! Nice quick work!]

newscomauHQ Out now, the O’Farrell 2014 Vintage. Just buy it before 10pm. bit.ly/1iXdqEs pic.twitter.com/BREuCWhOjO
@dobes Fairfax did the wine angle yesterday too.
bengrubb NBN Co’s release of results of FTTN speed tests conducted on *ONE* connection in Umina in NSW is ridiculous. Test 100 and come back to us.

RT @0xAli: People gathering to watch the bomb disarming …. 仕方が無い pic.twitter.com/QjD1i6nXHk [Umm folks? Folks, can you…?]
Nope, won’t be talking Bitcoin on @1395FIVEaa after all today. Oddly enough there were other things in the news.
I’m told I’m talking Bitcoin and ATMs on Adelaide’s 1395 FIVEaa at 1415 ACST / 1445 AEST, and you can listen at fiveaa.com.au
bengrubb Another to add to the #Heartbleed affected list: Realestate.com.au: reuters.com/article/2014/0…
“Talking smartphone (not) privacy on ABC @RNLifeMatters”, 20 min audio from yesterday. stilgherrian.com/conversations/…
“Heartbleed heartache: This was not a drill, people, and you failed”, a replacing the A-G with a cartoon turtle. zdnet.com/heartbleed-hea…
OK, final pluggage for me media stuff from the past couple days, and then I’ll settle into getting this @Pozible thing written up.
“Billionaires Warn Higher Taxes Could Prevent Them From Buying Politicians” newyorker.com/online/blogs/b…

expectproblems Best. Ever. RT @_Jiggsy: This is a Huge #GoT Spoiler. pic.twitter.com/j2kkyELOd7
@franksting It’s getting close to that point, I admit. But good offers arrive too. Sometimes.

andy_park #grangegate #homeonthegrange #bof #nsw #sydney #thuglife #lockout #barryofarrell pic.twitter.com/sR6qJ6Sim4
Email arrives promoting $38 flights to Melbourne. Clicks. Sees it’s Jetstar. Closes web browser. Deletes email.
ssharwood If NSW was a computer, right about now you’d erase the hard drive and install a fresh OS. #grangegate
shiftkey today we are all “utterly honourable”
BREAKING: Toronto’s Rob Ford in preselection race for NSW Premier vacancy.
RT @1petermartin: MT @domknight: ‘Rake’ is looking more like documentary. [Um, you mean it wasn’t?]
RT @scottcarson1957: @dannolan @stilgherrian Good God…those guys look like Sewer Commissioners from Jersey City. [Yep. O’Farrell on left.]
@scottcarson1957 @ArmsControlWonk Indeed. This is a once-in-a-generational clusterbomb of political arsehattery coming undone. Joy.
Now the other day I said to someone about ICAC, “This looks like when it all starts unravelling.” Who was that person?

dannolan “YOLO” - Barry O’Farrell pic.twitter.com/9vhU1SKf0c
latikambourke March 11 2014 the Senate was told “The Prime Minister has not met with Mr Nick Di Girolamo.” Today PM Abbott can’t rule that out.
If @abcnews does put the full unedited pressers from today on their website then when I am at ABC Ultimo tomorrow there will be payback.
You know those scenes in the movies when the secrets have simply been bottled up too long? Will that be Barry O’Farrell at ICAC today?
So, O’Farrell is back giving evidence? Has he got anything to lose now? Is this going to be more memory loss? Or opening the floodgate?
Wait, I’ve missed something. Has Mr Rabbit’s brain imploded again?
@scottcarson1957 @ArmsControlWonk The glorious case of one side of politics trying to take out the other, and gets itself fried by blowback.
@scottcarson1957 @ArmsControlWonk NSW Premier O’Farrell gave evidence yesterday, much memory loss. Today he’s shown a document, resigns.
@scottcarson1957 @ArmsControlWonk But they’re uncovering links between Labor power brokers and state and federal Coalition politicians.
@scottcarson1957 @ArmsControlWonk NSW Independent Commission Against Corruption (ICAC) is investigating Labor, currently in opposition…
@scottcarson1957 @ArmsControlWonk I see. Well, I’ll have to explore that later. We’re currently having a rather amazing day in politics…
@grum I see. Well… I don’t need to say it, do I.
RT [REDACTED]: Why on earth is Abbott strapping himself so tightly to O’Farrell and Sinodinos? [Let’s start drawing possible diagrams…]
macleanbrendan Yes but was he sent the wine before or after 10pm?
RT @mattjpwns: WALKING THE PLONK [OK, people, there’s your headline. You can take it from there.]
Colvinius “Yesterday, All my troubles seemed so far away. Now it seems they’re here to stay” premier.nsw.gov.au/sites/default/… via @ERN_Malleyscrub
SnarkyPlatypus No train to the second airport? O RLY? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
shoerust Oh I see. Tony’s building the airport so MH370 has somewhere to land.
@jeamland @juhasaarinen Here in Australia they’ll insist on a certified instructor training you. In Vegas I can do that for you.
RT @SnarkyPlatypus: Tones’ media minders really need a safe word that shuts down his brain when spoken. [Mr Rabbit’s minders please note!]
RT @Wendycarlisle: Worst advertisement ever for Grange ’59. Totally forgettable #ICAC [Well played, Wendy.]
One bottle of wine is basically a light lunch.
@jeamland @juhasaarinen Sure, there’s a range in Sydney that does intro-to-shooting days, but American Shooters in Las Vegas is the way.
People who admit to having memory loss after just one bottle of wine? Softcocks.
@jeamland Another is a single recorder at 24 bits, set input levels to gunfire with a peak limiter, compress afterwards.
@jeamland @juhasaarinen One is to run two recorders, one with levels set to speech, one to not peak when a weapon fires, fix it in post.
@jeamland @juhasaarinen I’ve recorded gunfire before, semi-automatic and full auto. There’s a couple techniques that you can use…
I assume the O’Farrellogic is that if ICAC has got some random thank-you note then they’ve got whatever else was in that shoebox.
@NewtonMark @gavincostello @jturner_ibrs You’re not pinning this on me! I didn’t even get a bottle of wine!
I don’t know if that @ArmsControlWonk @scottcarson1957 retweet makes sense out of context, but I am literally lolling.

ArmsControlWonk @scottcarson1957 “Da, Volodya. She put model airplane like so …” pic.twitter.com/8ag9GdKEIF
@gavincostello @jturner_ibrs Yeah, @NewtonMark kicked off about CERT Australia last night. Happy days.
RT @juhasaarinen: Why not The 9mm Edict? [Why not indeed! *makes note* Ping @jeamland]
firstdogonmoon At least people are still writing thankyou notes, I think that is nice.
Pollytics Sorry - I come from Qld. I don’t understand how that whole “taking responsibility in politics” thing works. It’s weirdly alluring

GuardianJessica Do you fancy some Greg Hunt erotic fanfic? Me neither theguardian.com/commentisfree/… @firstdogonmoon dares mentioning it tho pic.twitter.com/sIe8j1hqBc

MWhitbourn The thank you note from O’Farrell to Di Girolamo #ICAC pic.twitter.com/iiVJT0v47K
ABCnewsIntern This inquiry was supposed to destroy the ALP for a generation, but brought down the Coalition’s best Premier. Royal Commission will be fun.

See, this is precisely why I am this very moment preparing a @Pozible… pic.twitter.com/3Ui3Ky9Hih
beneltham Wait til they hear about the $1000 wheel of cheese
TerryAustralis Long live the rum corps
glengyron Premier Gladys?
joshgnosis Most expensive gift ever.
SnarkyPlatypus All of these first term LNP governments have been rather special, haven’t they?
BernardKeane we’ve just lost one of the best political leaders in the country over a stupid memory lapse. idiot.
Bye bye Barry.
RT @oberonsghost: Halp! I’m in a room full of strangers, Blend 43, no wi-fi and The Today Show blaring! [PANTS OFF TIME!]
It’s OK, folks, Barry is onto it now. He’s spotted the problem. “Significant memory fail on my part.” He’s leadership material. All good.
latikambourke Premier Barry O’Farrell ‘this has been a significant memory fail on my part.’ #ICAC @abcnews
Kate_McClymont Breaking : card from Premier Barry O’Farrell thanking Mr Di Girolamo for the marvellous gift of the $3000 recovered by #icac
@RealNickHodge If you drill down through the newsletters, you’ll find a map of the underground base itself. It’s HUGE.
@RealNickHodge Yep, the Blue Mountains Triangle and the secret underground US UFO base up here. mysteriousaustralia.com/blue_mountains…
@RealNickHodge Here, this’ll keep you busy for a while. mysteriousaustralia.com
I probably shouldn’t get too shouty while I have this avatar, otherwise they’ll send around The Unmarked Van again.
@RealNickHodge I CANNOT DISAGREE WITH YOU IN FACT I AGREE WITH EVERYTHING YOU SAY WHERE IS MY GREEN BALLPOINT PEN I NEED TO WRITE TO MY MP.

nickbilton A 3-year-old boy in Omaha went missing earlier today. Police just found him inside a Bear Claw vending machine. pic.twitter.com/Jaj38n7gWE
“The 57 Best Conspiracy Theories I Heard At New Jersey’s 55th Annual UFO Conference” buzzfeed.com/katieheaney/th…

@bengrubb @lukehopewell Get an edible hat, Ben, @TheNTNews will win with this headline. bit.ly/1e6YErY pic.twitter.com/Uyq2IWKDkT
In which @GrogsGamut dismantles the bullshit of Australia’s “Age of Entitlement” with facts and charts thereof. abc.net.au/news/2014-04-1…
I will be in Sydney tomorrow, should anyone care to make use of that fact. Also over Easter.
@myrcurial Why thank you. I feel very special now.
realscientists Just don’t stick your finger in the container and you’ll be fine.
jsweeney_ibrs Looks like James Turner’s predictions on phone based biometrics diluting the value of this security came true. ow.ly/3jjkWs
Me at @zdnetaustralia yesterday: “Heartbleed heartache: This was not a drill, people, and you failed” zdnet.com/heartbleed-hea…
@shermozle Yeah, I see your point. Just exploring to make sure this isn’t an over-simplification. I’d like it to be this simple a choice.
“The three possible responses to Heartbleed”, writes @shermozle, with a question added from me. blog.simonrumble.com/the-three-poss…
@jeffsonstein @SnarkyPlatypus How would that compare with, say Boeing 787 or Airbus A380 engineering manuals, I wonder?
“What are the chances that your dad isn’t your father?”, from @ConversationEDU theconversation.com/what-are-the-c…
“[Samsung] Galaxy S5’s fingerprint scanner has already been hacked, PayPal accounts at risk” bgr.com/2014/04/15/gal…
willozap Why don’t we crowdsource reform of the ALP? Submit an idea, vote them up, best ones get stomped on by a homophobic rightwing powerbroker
Wed plan: Chicken (done); finalise the SEKRIT thing; much planning; @5at5daily; evening TBA, but dinner somewhere, certainly.
@SnarkyPlatypus I know bugger all about the US tax system, except that I am now reminded that a US publisher owes me money.
RT @michaelneale: @stilgherrian full of fast flowing water or empty and made from concrete? [I am canal-flexible. Any canal should do.]
@PeteLawler @straczynski Now we are very much back on the same page.
RT @glengyron: Can’t wait for Bullock and Bernardi to be arrested together in Glebe Park. [NO-ONE NEEDS THIS MENTAL IMAGE YOU BASTARD.]
I also wish people would just throw themselves into a canal.
I do wish people would try to engage with the real, complex world, instead of their own cartoon-level caricature of it.
Many situations can be understood by everyone via critical thinking. Many more situations work out better by punching them hard in the face.
@johnthelutheran Yeah, same here. It’s the old “I don’t agree with his war plans, therefore everything his says is stupid” idiocy.
@PeteLawler @RumsfeldOffice Same response to you as to @Surlysimon. Being able to suggest doesn’t mean your suggestion will win out.
@Surlysimon @RumsfeldOffice What information do you have that says he didn’t? Rumsfeld does call it his “annual letter”.
Donald Rumsfeld copped flak for his “known unknowns” stuff, but that taxonomy is precisely what’s need for genuine risk analysis.

RumsfeldOffice That I & most Americans have no idea whether our taxes are accurate tells us something. My annual letter to the #IRS: pic.twitter.com/BFh0AXTvAk
Leave it with me, @Shear_Gold @Bryan_Field15 @BriggsJamie. I am from Adelaide, after all, we know about these things.
Shear_Gold @stilgherrian @Bryan_Field15 @BriggsJamie is there any way we can emulate nature and create crude oil from our unwanted corpses?
Politicians usually get Edifice Complex in their final term, not a mere eight months after being elected for the first time. Poor Mr Rabbit.
Mr Rabbit’s urge to be “the infrastructure prime minister” just means he’s suffering from Edifice Complex. jargondatabase.com/Category/Polit…

moorehn I will never get over how tech companies sound like My Little Ponies. Here, Yahoo’s acquisitions. pic.twitter.com/PAsgAdMGQu
RT @SnarkyPlatypus: People in the Adelaide Hills care about western Sydney? [Not traditionally, no.]
Pro Tip for Coalition MPs (and others): The “21st Century” goes all the way to 2099. So what’s your vision for Australia in, say, 2064?
“Infrastructure for the 21st Century”! Drink! So, @BriggsJamie, decentralised solar and wind power, and fibre? Oh. Coal. Trucks. Yeah OK.
Oh, and @BriggsJamie has just said they’d Stop the Boats! Twice in 30 seconds! Achievement unlocked!
Say “Western Sydney” again, @BriggsJamie MP, it’s good practice for the Member for… Mayo. And it gets me excited. Say “Western Sydney”.
Could Australia’s Attorney-General be replaced with a cartoon turtle? A cyberturtle, as it were? zdnet.com/heartbleed-hea… #heartbleed
I am in a mood to re-pimp my thing quite a bit this morning. So I will.
@PeteLawler @sylmobile The thing that causes you to be found, years later, in a shallow grave.
Here’s a pair of well-written Heartbleed advisories from @Silent_Circle’s @joncallas blog.silentcircle.com/heartbleed-bug/ blog.silentcircle.com/finishing-up-f…
Wed plan, draft: Chicken; finalise the SEKRIT thing; much planning; @5at5daily; evening TBA, but dinner somewhere, certainly.
One good thing may come out of the ICAC hearings: politicians will be scared out of calling for a mandatory data retention regime.
@myrcurial That and the ex-farmboy thing of waking at 0500 anyway. Ah well, it’s a phase I should grow out of in a few decades.
@myrcurial Mistress Insomnia is also a bitch. I’ve been on four or five hours a night for months, apart from once the other day.
@myrcurial Imposter Syndrome is a bitch.
@llament Well that’s getting the passwords/PINs one at a time. Heartbleed lets you get the server’s private key, so you have everything.
@myrcurial I said “specialists” not “experts”. Your incompetence is unquestioned. ;) And thank you. Ranty op-eds breed next-day insecurity.
@myrcurial I’d be interested in your comments on this, since you and accomplices partly inspired it. zdnet.com/heartbleed-hea…

RT @myrcurial: @gattaca @mckeay @krypt3ia More like: pic.twitter.com/R4Rh3vMoEJ [Damn. And I found the internet to be so handy. I’ll miss it.]
MT @jturner_ibrs: It raises a question: if our gov’t is unwilling to help protect us online, then they can’t tell us what to do. [Yup.]
Plenty of agreement overnight with my “Heartbleed heartache: This was not a drill, people, and you failed” zdnet.com/heartbleed-hea… Thanks.
@jturner_ibrs @gavincostello That’s expressed more starkly in a slightly different direction than I’d been thinking, but you’re right.
@Steve_Lockstep Thanks, Steve. And in answer to your emailed question, yes, go for it.
@jameslyne Thanks, James. Listening to you and @MalwareJake and @johullrich in recent days has gotten me thinking.
@SnarkyPlatypus Je suis tout à coup à la normale. L’avatar a été changé.
@SnarkyPlatypus Je pense que je dois être malade. Et vous?
@SnarkyPlatypus Bonjour. e suis confus. Je n’ai pas changé mon avatar parce que je pensais que le choix d’aujourd’hui était trop sans goût.
MT @AndrewPStreet: I stand corrected on the pudenda, @TweetCashmore. [Well there’s a sentence you don’t see every day!]
IT IS WEDNESDAY WEDNESDAY WEDNESDAY WEDNESDAY WEDNESDAY WEDNESDAY WEDNESDAY OK SO START DOING SOMETHING USEFUL.