@atonymosca @MatthewBevan @NewtonMark You might attract them. Like moths.
An excellent thread from the Australian Parliament’s Head Beekeeper. (Yes, that’s a thing.) twitter.com/jagungal1/stat…
Oh look, @dobes @rohan_p @davidgerard, a proposal for pegging BTC to USD. #freedom twitter.com/LukeDashjr/sta…
GrogsGamut So how was your day social media Lib person?
“Well we had to take down the video of Shorten that ended with a guns..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Ur
@playswithf1re Oh that’s brilliant! Ping @dobes.
stevelord A typical #ICO on #crypto twitter pic.twitter.com/0bLS8lwr6h
Pollytics We are the only country in the world that treats “The Budget” - a document of dubious value that has never lasted 3..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Yk
@jennylmackinnon Sadly the drug trade is only a single digit of billions of dollars, if memory serves.
@tintinaus @arcadiagt5 Or any part of your house, really. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
@micheinnz It won’t last.
So apropos of nothing in particular, I’ve just worked out an easy way to slash $36 billion off the budget. twitter.com/SquigglyRick/s…
kels_316 there have been electric cars since before there were petrol cars you dipshit twitter.com/abcthedrum/sta…
Me at @zdnetaustralia Friday: “Data science, ethics, and the ‘massive scumbags’ problem” zdnet.com/article/data-s…
Today I discovered Twitter Video Downloader, which does what it says on the tin. twittervideodownloader.com
@bigbadave @Pollytics @jonkudelka @liamvhogan Cruel but fair.
@Quicksilveraus He has an attitude, that bird.
@bigbadave @Pollytics @jonkudelka @liamvhogan Or, you know, more than 75% of France’s electricity, and a bunch else..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…O5
@NewtonMark @MatthewBevan Also, nothing warmer than the ambient air temperature.
@Pollytics @jonkudelka @liamvhogan “Atomic Planes Are Closer Than You Think” pic.twitter.com/9dWqusmsxo
@Pollytics @jonkudelka @liamvhogan Be that as it may, a nuke ute could be called the “nute” or maybe the “uke” so that’s a win.
@Nyx2701 Clearly he does good trade there.
@NewtonMark Well I guess that’s the point of these flights. :P
@Pollytics @jonkudelka @liamvhogan What, blocking the cooling air intake?
@Nyx2701 That’s the chap. He has a couple of regular spots, and that’s one of them. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
@jonkudelka @Pollytics @liamvhogan Introducing the 1958 Ford Nucleon! pic.twitter.com/BOK0cIVAEl
@Nyx2701 This specific bird also cons tourists out of their lunch, amongst other things. It’s a real prick.
@dobes If you watch closely, you’ll see that the jerkbird is actually flying to bring up the corner of the flag so..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…L1
This photograph shows the scene. twitter.com/stilgherrian/s…
The Sulphur-Crested Cockatoo is a marvellous thing, unless it gets near any objects that you value. Like your shopp..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…kt
@dobes If this sort of thing happened in The America, the jerkbird would have copped about 200 rounds from the local AR-15 enthusiasts.
Today’s excellent jerkbird action. twitter.com/DRG_physics/st…
@dobes Beautiful work!
@irisherself Kinda cute, yes.
@mattjhatton @NewtonMark I guess we’ll soon find out.
On a related note… twitter.com/NewtonMark/sta…
The F-35 will be flying at night, @NewtonMark. twitter.com/AusAirForce/st…
@BundyB @twiddlekins I guess we’ll find out soon enough.
erstkate I would suck Maggie Beer’s verjuice right from the bottle #makesomethingsoundoff
I am a Taurus and that’s why I am a bad man who had been a bit of a sook about a headbutt or something. @erstkate twitter.com/erstkate/statu…
HAHAHAHAHA! twitter.com/ScottMorrisonM…
Not quite as good was mine on @abcadelaide in the late 1980s, when at 0830 after “AM” we broke the news that to avo..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…MW
This remains one of the most brilliant April Fools Day joke ever. twitter.com/FXMC1957/statu…
@Chrisquirk @FionaPattenMLC Yeah it seems that the reaction today has been… not good. And rightly so. twitter.com/search?f=tweet…
@blasphemybunny @firstdogonmoon That is phenomenally horrible. Thank you, too, for your service.
@jxeeno I’m a big fan of Science…
@NewtonMark Hard things always go soft eventually, Mark.
nigelcameron Said the guy who personally exhumed his dead wife…. twitter.com/AndrewNebus/st…
Beautiful work. twitter.com/Breaking911/st…
SkyNews A study has found a track by dubstep artist Skrillex ‘could protect against mosquitoes’ po.st/OpDCcK
@firstdogonmoon Thank you for your service, Soldier.
“What’s in the new data hosting strategy for the APS?” by @Stevie_Easton themandarin.com.au/106500-whats-i…
PointlessAU Did you know…’Cold Buttocks’ is the Norwegian title of ‘Cool Runnings’?
Also, shoutout to the Douglas Mawson fa..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…pC
@firstdogonmoon So, I would like to believe you, but you have been going every year.
@firstdogonmoon Bah. You love it.
@SoniaCuff @PollHereford Yeah they’re pretty special.
“Canberra believes it’s doing enough to measure government digital competency” by @ashabeeeee zdnet.com/article/canber…
@paulkidd @oberonsghost @reselsnark @dobes @rohan_p @davidgerard THIS IS GETTING TOTALLY OUT OF HAND.
@jpwarren SHOW ME THE DATA! pic.twitter.com/ZpZtLjrTDd
@RealNickHodge Man, recent advances in teledildonics have been amazing.
@reselsnark @paulkidd @dobes @rohan_p @davidgerard BLOCKCHAINMAIL!
I usually don’t retweet police “Can you help?” messages outside my home state, but I reckon we all need to have a s..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Mm
So that speech by Microsoft president Brad Smith at @Sydney_Uni for @USSC on Thursday night, the one what I tweeted..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…EW
glengyron Powerful gun control message from My President. twitter.com/paulsef/status…
@paulkidd Mate. This just has to be a thing. Attn: @dobes @rohan_p @davidgerard.
@johnthelutheran Yeah maybe I haven’t thought this through.
Cromulentwords Maggie Beer has been verjuice signaling for years and no one is calling her out
Thanks for the update, @TrainLinkWest. This looks like difficult and dangerous work. twitter.com/TrainLinkWest/…
@SoniaCuff We could make it into a seniority thing. First level hackers wear a hoodie. Then they get to move to the..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…4n
@FlatL1ne True enough. :)
I always thought you had to wear a black hoodie to be a hacker but apparently these days it’s a hacking harness. twitter.com/FlatL1ne/statu…
@elronxenu So, Mission Accomplished!
“Researchers Find Google Play Store Apps Were Actually Government Malware” motherboard.vice.com/amp/en_us/arti…
joshgnosis When the substitute teacher arrives with a lesson plan. pic.twitter.com/DvruRk74oL
@tshanahan83 A decision with bipartisan support.
@tshanahan83 I’m trying to think of someone who’d be worse.
HAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHA! HAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHA! twitter.com/bradesposito/s…
For me it’s the hand gestures explaining how the plastic vagina works. pic.twitter.com/VtkWAil7W8
“It is wonderful technology. It can regulate everything.” Which do you prefer? The sniffling or the hand gestures? twitter.com/fired4smart/st…
@dobes This… this is the greatest honour I have ever received. [Sheds tear]
@dobes I’m pushing things here, aren’t I.
@dobes No, last week you complimented me on it, but Sierra’s tweet certainly complements that.
See, @dobes? “Entertaining”! twitter.com/SierraHirt/sta…
@AndrewPStreet @TheGrimRecapper You’re the hero we need in these troubled times, Andrew.
OzKitsch Her Majesty the Queen inspects sheep’s arses at Dubbo, 1954
dubbophotonews.com.au/news/general-n… pic.twitter.com/ohZ1lWnLM7
@D_Keating Nah, it’s too subtle to be a Cop Twitter joke.
@erstkate @juhasaarinen Beautiful.
@BundyB Line dancing can do that to you.
@juhasaarinen I reckon Jenex would be a good given name.
“Fraudulent activity relating to line dancing events” is an interesting category of crime. Watch out for it, appare..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…GW
QldPolice Have you been a victim of this fraudulent activity relating to line dancing events including overseas and domestic..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…JJ
rhysam Nothing I love more than comedy police. 🙄 twitter.com/lets_stop_here…
@TheGrimRecapper Toto-ly.
To be fair, I would like to hear a lot more of Ozzy Osbourne’s opinions about almost anything.
EXACTLY WE NEED TO KNOW THESE THINGS. twitter.com/TheGrimRecappe…
What does Bananarama think about Russian aggression in Ukraine? Has Ozzy Osbourne spoken out about corporate tax po..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…FO
DO YOU KNOW WHAT WE NEED MORE OF? WE NEED MORE RANDOM PEOPLE FROM 1980s BANDS GIVING US THEIR OPINIONS ON THINGS. T..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…jv
Mon plan, confirmed: Traditional start-of-month administrivia (mostly done); disco nap (momentarily); write for..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Jw
tom_tanuki Lots of talk comparing ISIS and white supremacists. And I agree, but I’d add that ISIS were forged in the fires of..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…ww
@erstkate Thank you for helping.
jonkudelka Pretty shocked Andrew Bolt didn’t enjoy the last episode of Get Krackin. It’s the way he keeps people guessing that..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…6M
@erkpod Please keep us informed on how #purpletrain school is going. When do they let you fly solo?
@erstkate Except it’s, you know, not.
I’m a big fan of reflecting realty. How about you, @SnarkyPlatypus? twitter.com/ASPI_org/statu…
I really do appreciate @GenMhayden’s directness these days, even if I am a foreigner. pic.twitter.com/tR6QRiajRt
@AUSFestivus @bastardsheep @dobes Tada!
@BundyB That’d be a beachside photo op.
@crgentle Well that’s just blatant, that is.
@Arash_Mohebbi And the problem with that would be…?
Why does Scott Morrison keep hanging around swimming pools? Is this a solidarity with George Pell thing?
MikeCarlton01 This is quite true. I’m also saving huge amounts of money by not paying for saddlery, oats, grooms, coachmen, ostl..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Da
HEY @dobes THERE IS A DRONE ANGLE TO THE GLENBROOK BIG ROCK STORY. twitter.com/TrainsInfo/sta…
Shorono This is the most cursed faceswap i have ever seen. pic.twitter.com/4EgMaMQS6x
@crgentle I dunno, he was OK with the gay lions. pic.twitter.com/Qai27mxIPW
Birds have a cloaca so all bird sex is sodomy.
@NuclearAnthro To be fair, though, Rick Perry has probably never sodomised a turkey.
@RealNickHodge You have just been added to a List.
Noon.
@RealNickHodge HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
@jpwarren “ANAO notes Defence has not evaluated the regime over the decade it has been in place, nor set criteria for assessing success.”
“Defence is not applying its special process for troubled projects with ‘rigour’, and is more interested in maintai..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…ST
nehadk .@NBN_Australia had an opportunity for a great April Fool’s gag - Announcing that everyone gets FTTH as part of the..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…XW
NuclearAnthro @JasonKirell @pwnallthethings Rick Perry, current Secretary of Nukes, also got Ds in Feeds and Feeding and Writing..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…nC
jason_a_w someone tell the boys upstairs that the simulation is glitching again twitter.com/FFRAFAction/st…
MatthewBevan Twitter after anyone suggests some aspect of ALP policy is perhaps a little half-baked pic.twitter.com/aqsmv24cLS
antifatwa But when is men’s fools day…?
In further Facebook coincidence news…
Screenshot from today’s @ASPI_ICPC Cyber Digest. Subscribe at..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Bf
To be fair I would watch this movie. twitter.com/paulwiggins/st…
TCC_News Recently, regular Magnetic Isalnd ferry users contacted Townsville City Council and claimed that Magnetic Island se..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…ib
@jxeeno And rightly so.
@aggerchez I can understand their confusion. Declassifying this kind of information is unprecedented, and very, ver..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…eG
@OreganoJowns @jmacmullin Good point. Here’s the equivalent paragraph from Burgess’ speech last week, though he was..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Dg
This is the best comment on @ASDGovAu recruitment ever. twitter.com/jmacmullin/sta…
@jxeeno Beautiful work, Ken.
jxeeno Dear Google, there’s a joke of an event that happens three times a year called Senate Estimates you should 100% mak..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…H9
@garystark @gths I’ve decided to ignore as much politics today as I can, because tomorrow will be busy enough.
@jmacmullin HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Yeah nah. Secret City is no Top Gun.
@aggerchez Wow. That’s the operator I and others wrote about last week. We really do live in a different age!
@DavidRDHeath Don’t worry, there’s still plenty of fans out there.
gths April Fools Day is basically cancelled because nothing is plausible anymore
@jmacmullin ASD now has a solid comms and PR team, and since recruitment is a continuing problem they’re obviously..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Gp
dobes There’s likely to be estimates on Thursday and Friday, and as you can see, everyone is well prepared for this compl..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…aU
@dobes I think that’s just sending unsolicited dick pics.
@liamvhogan Is this about Moon Nazis again?
So that story of an ASD “Offensive Cyber Covert Online Operator” I posted last week? zdnet.com/article/austra… By “co..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…In
WIRED Odds are, if you’ve seen The Matrix, the image of green characters cascading down a black screen is cemented in you..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Mb
classiclib3ral Government transparency group Wikileaks will back whatever candidate that promises to give them girlfriends pic.twitter.com/5upEXLUVpi
ABARES The temperature outlook for April - June 2019 indicates that daytime temperatures are more likely to be warmer than..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Jc
@dobes @darrenpauli @rohan_p @SnarkyPlatypus “Here’s to my Sweet Satan.”
FFRAFAction Jim Carrey has upset Mussolini’s granddaughter
(Not something I was expecting to write today) pic.twitter.com/j16shFsZej
@Idealaw @rohan_p @R_Chirgwin Ah yes. Thanks for the reminder. Now please stop making me cry.
sentantiq #SundayEvening #BigMood
“I hate living for no reason and not being drunk.”
μισῶ ζῆν ἐς κενὸν οὐ μεθύων.
#Hedylus
@jetztgibtshaue @TrainLinkWest I like your thinking.
@erkpod @evcricket @TrainLinkWest @lithgowmercury @TrainsInfo Fortunately in Australia we only get this problem on..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…ur
_cingraham Oh also: 18-30 year olds are nearly *twice* as likely to report past-year celibacy as 50-somethings, which is frank..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…uZ
@davidgerard It’s some time now since Wright’s home and offices were searched under warrant by the Australian Feder..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…f8
davidgerard According to a recently filed court document in the Kleiman-Wright case, it appears that Craig Wright is (or was) u..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…a7
beneltham Bwa Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha ha ha ha twitter.com/theheraldsun/s…
VirginAustralia Australian foodies rejoice because Virgin Australia is now delivering food from your favourite interstate restauran..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…ZN
@dobes @darrenpauli @rohan_p @SnarkyPlatypus Also, I just saw that that story is from 2014, so I assume that Darren..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…Qp
@dobes @darrenpauli @rohan_p @SnarkyPlatypus What I really like, @dobes, is Westpac giving all the kids the opportu..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…7e
As usual, the Weekly Wrap has more alleged plans, links to the Excellent Things I Wrote Last Week, and for some rea..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…kB
Mon plan, draft: It’s the start of a new month, so I have some traditional-for-me tasks to get through. No, you can..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…ow
@dobes @darrenpauli @rohan_p @SnarkyPlatypus This explainer on pay pigs is quite good. independent.co.uk/life-style/lov…
@darrenpauli @dobes @rohan_p No. I won’t. But I know @SnarkyPlatypus will be amused. (I think he and I were amused..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…rE
@erkpod @evcricket @TrainLinkWest @lithgowmercury @TrainsInfo I don’t think that “dangle” is the right verb here, t..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…WL
Remember_Sarah I saw the Apollo 11 documentary the other day and cannot get over the fact that we put men on the moon YEARS before..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…1e
@rohan_p @R_Chirgwin My energy levels haven’t quite reached “rejoice” standards yet.
@rohan_p @R_Chirgwin I haven’t got a single one. I’m not sure whether to feel sad about that or not.
It’s good to see @CARROT_app getting into the spirit of things. pic.twitter.com/yS5FrU4JcS
@jetztgibtshaue @TrainLinkWest Just quietly, 20 tonnes of gelignite would be slightly too much. Actually 20kg would..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…gS
@burgotastic @TrainLinkWest Oh if only that were possible.
@TrainLinkWest Does the Rock of Concern aka the Glenbrook Big Rock have its own Twitter account yet? pic.twitter.com/USFz9FkpUt
@TrainLinkWest Also, part of me wants to see it all go just slightly wrong and the rock ending up squashing one of those 4wd utes.
These photos of the Rock of Concern seem to indicate that they’re going to push it so it falls down onto the tracks..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…ef
TrainLinkWest Geotechnical engineers are working hard to secure & remove the 20 tonne rock above the tracks at Glenbrook.
Until..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…GG
@erkpod @evcricket @TrainLinkWest Ah! The @lithgowmercury has some better photos that @TrainLinkWest or @TrainsInfo..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…e5
@erkpod @evcricket I agree that the rock is big. I hope that @TrainLinkWest can post some more photos of the rock,..twitter.com/i/web/status/1…HH
@JustJimWillDo @Twitter @TweetDeck @BetterTDeck It’s @BetterTDeck. I just checked.
JustJimWillDo The best April Fools Day jokes are the subtle ones.
Well played by one of @Twitter, @TweetDeck, or @BetterTDeck. pic.twitter.com/9zm1u4R2b3
Monday. What IS that creaking sound? You’d better find out! Monday.